


The Everyday Heroes Alliance

by toastycatty



Series: The Everyday Heroes Alliance [1]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Comedy, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Psychological Trauma, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-15 18:20:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 44,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29193705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toastycatty/pseuds/toastycatty
Summary: After the Miracle Queen debacle, the former Miraculous wielders get together as the MHA (Miraculous Holder Alliance) to hold each other up and try to help Paris heroes any way they can. As Heroes' Day is fast approaching, they decide to tackle a major project involving all of Mme Bustier's class. Lots of civilian shenanigans will ensue. Can a bunch of teenagers help a city heal? Which ships will sail?
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Kagami Tsurugi, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe, Chloe Bourgeois/theraphy, Chloé Bourgeois & Sabrina Raincomprix, Chloé Bourgeois/Luka Couffaine, Ivan Bruel/Mylène Haprèle, Juleka Couffaine/Rose Lavillant, Luka Couffaine/Kagami Tsurugi, Luka Couffaine/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Lê Chiến Kim & Ondine, Marc Anciel/Nathaniel Kurtzberg, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug/Kagami Tsurugi, Max Kanté & Markov
Series: The Everyday Heroes Alliance [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2190816
Comments: 66
Kudos: 137





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So, you'll not see everyone here. This is more to give context to the main story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually recorded myself reading it aloud. you can check it in youtube.

[audiobook](https://youtu.be/QBCvFAQp3_I)

As Heroes’ Day was approaching again, the Miraculous Holder Alliance (MHA) came up with an idea for their class. Well, not everyone in MHA attended 4th year B at College Francoise Dupont, but Luka’s twin sister did, and all of Kagami’s friends did, so Luka and Kagami felt like honorary members of Mme Bustier’s homeroom. There was another reason for MHA to want to tackle a group project with the students in 4th year B at Francoise Dupont: Almost everyone in that class had been akumatized, some of them, repeatedly.

“Let me see if I follow, you propose we enlist all class, the 15 of us, to do some massive event and raise lots of funds...?” Alya shot Nino an inquisitive look.

“And donate that money to something that helps fight Hawkmoth!” Nino elaborated, adding a fistpump for extra flare.

Kim scrunched his face, “Like the police department?”

“I don’t see how that can help, but we can give the funds to Chat Noir and Ladybug,” Kagami added. “They are children, like us, and I’m sure they need support for their heroics they can’t turn to their families to get.”

“If you look at it from a process perspective,” Max interjected, as he pushed his glasses up his nose, “what would relieve Ladybug and Cat Noir would be to make the system more fault tolerant.”

There was a beat, after which, he elaborated. “We need to make the general public more resilient, so that they won’t become akuma targets when the smallest inconvenience comes their way.”

“Like hearing some news they don’t like,” pointed out Alya.

“Like being told off by the police when they are at fault,” snickered Luka.

“Like having some romantic misunderstanding,” added Kim.

“I like the way you think,” agreed Kagami. 

Max continued, “According to our research, most people get akumatized over trivial matters, rather than situations with high stakes.” 

“People need a healthier relationship with their emotions and thoughts,” Luka said.

Nino wasn’t convinced, “But there have been people akumatized over losing their jobs, and other serious stuff.”

Alya was scrolling through the Ladyblog as she replied, “but they have been few, Max is onto something. If we can help cut down the temper tantrums, we’ll be helping Ladybug and Chat Noir.”

“Maybe some money can go to kitchen soups, or wellfare too, to help the other ones...” said Chloe.

Everyone stared at her for the longest time. Yes, she has been very publicly the Bee holder, and yes, even though she played a key role in outing all of their secret identities, they had repeatedly invited her to the MHA meetings, but actually, no one had expected her to come. And no one had heard her. She must have been listening for the longest time, not daring to make herself known.

“Your mother let me in, Max,” Chloe said in an uncharacteristically small voice.

“Come, have a seat,” Kagami said at last, while flashing a rather awkward smile.

“So,” Alya took the reins again, “We agree? We enlist the whole class to do some amazing gig or something and try to give the money to NGOs that will help people chill out and not lash out? Some mental health awareness campaign, or some free mindfulness course in a zen garden?”

“If the issue is getting the money, I could get my dad to make a fat donation, Adrien could probably pull something like that too, we don’t need to enlist the whole bunch of los... licé students to get money,” Chloe said, flipping her hair.

It was Kim’s turn to say something, “Well, we should definitely do that, if we can get a lot of cash... but we still need to enlist everyone. I don’t think... It’s not only about the money, right?”

“You’re right,” seconded Nino. “A big part of the plan is about helping the dudes to help! We’ve all been there, guys. Almost everyone in this class has been akumatized multiple times.”

“Thirty-nine and a half akumatizations so far, to be exact,” contributed Max. “And Hawkmoth tends to re-akumatize people.” He actually produced a tally chart for everyone to see. It was rather impressive.

_Agreste, Adrien_

_Bourgeoise, Chloe 4 (Antibug, Queen Wasp, Heroes’day incident, Miracle Queen )._

_Bruel, Ivan 3 (Stoneheart x2, Red Hawkmoth incident)_

_Cesaire, Alya 4 ( Lady Wifi, Heroes’day incident, Oblivio, Felix incident )_

_Couffaine, Juleka 4 ( Reflekta, Reflecta+Reflekdoll, Felix incident, Marinette’s expulsion)_

_Dupain-Cheng, Marinette 1/2 ( expulsion incident)_

_Haprele, Mylene 2 ( Horrificator, Red Hawkmoth incident)_

_Kante, Max 2 ( Gamer, Heroes’ day incident, Gamer 2.0 ),_

_Kurtzberg, Nathaniel 1( Evillustrator )_

_Kubdel, Alix 2 ( Timebreaker, Red Hawkmoth incident)_

_Lahiffe, Nino 3 ( Bubbler, Heroes’ day incident, Oblivio ),_

_Lavillant, Rose 5 ( Princess Fragrance, Red Hawkmoth incident, Heroes’day incident, Felix incident, Marinette’s expulsion incident)._

_Le Chien, Kim 2 ( Dark Cupid, Red Hawkmoth incident)_

_Raincomprix, Sabrina 3 ( Antibug, Red Hawkmoth incident, Miraculer )_

_Rossi, Lila 4 ( Volpina, Red Hawkmoth incident, Heroes’day incident, Chameleon ),_

They looked at it silently for a while. It was sobering. 

“So really only Adrien has not been akumatized yet?” Kagami said.

“He’s a sunshine boy alright,” Alya smiled. “He's under a lot of pressure all the time, and his dad makes his life so hard...”

“And yet, he has the upper hand on all of us,” finished Kim. He made a competition out of anything.

“What about Marinette?” asked Luka. “Why has she got half an akumatization?”

Max explained, “You weren’t there of course. The day she was unfairly expelled, she was possessed by an akuma. Many of us were too, as you can see.” He circled in pink marker the instances of _Marinette’s expulsion incident_. “It was about to be a second Red Hawkmoth incident. But something must’ve happened, because he let go of all of us.” 

There was another pregnant pause.

“So, we recruit Mme Bustier’s homeroom, we help them deal with the guilt, and make themselves less of a target too,” reasoned Luka. "And in doing that, we cut LB and Chat some slack.”

“Hey, you two,” Chloe said, pointing at Luka and Kagami, “don’t act so high and mighty! You have been akumatized too! You were akumatized twice, Kagami!”

“Yes,” replied Kagami matter-of-factically. “Add three more to the count then.” 

Nino, true to his Carapace self, interceded. “Well, we can also recruit other 4th year students that have been akumatized, many of them are super talented too, and can surely help, like Marc, Nathaniel’s friend, you know...

“Oh! There is Aurore Boreal too! I picked on her until she got akumatized for the second time,” Chloe added, oddly proud.

They continued planning for half an hour more and decided to present their plan to the class the following day in homeroom, and maybe talk to the other candidates throughout the day. Night had already fallen, and the MHA left the Kante residence to make way to their own homes. Kim and Luka started walking south together. Nino and Alya waved goodbye and set course east, holding hands. Kagami and Chloe were waiting for their drives to pick them up. It was very awkward for some time.

“You know, this project is not only about helping Ladybug and Chat Noir, or the general public, or even Mme Bustier’s class,” Kagami said, looking ahead.

“What do you mean?”

“Everyone here feels responsible for not being available to help anymore. Everyone feels useless and guilty. MHA is about helping each other too.”

At that, Chloe’s shoes became immensely interesting. She simple couldn't look up.

“I’m glad you came. Come again,” Kagami said. She briefly patted Chloe’s shoulder before climbing onto her car. 


	2. The one about how they all got SONY Vegas pirate version installed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The MHA talks with class 4B and they bounce lots of ideas. Which one will be chosen? Who says they need to choose? I give myself a star for giving dialogue to all kids except Lila.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter read aloud by me is available in Youtube!

[audiobook](https://youtu.be/PnOwXH6w09Q)

Homeroom was buzzing that morning. Most of them were there (Marinette was running late, as usual; Lila claimed she needed to run some errands and fled), they sat or stood in a horseshoe, voicing their opinions not in the most orderly fashion.

“I totally think we can organise something awesome, I do, but what is it going to be?” Alix asked. 

“I can totally race you again and settle once and for all who’s the fastest!” Kim supplied.

“As much as I’d like to see you bite the dust, it’s a bit of a niche interest. That won’t gather the masses!” the petite girl replied.

“What about a musical event?” Adrien suggested, “We have a lot of talent here! Kitty section, Nino. I could even play the piano a bit too...”

“Statistically,” Max said, “more people are into music than teenagers racing, but it may be off-putting that your styles are so different. Kitty Section is...” he looked at Rose for confirmation, “unicorn-punk-core?”

Rose nodded with the biggest grin. Max continued, “Nino’s work is more Lo-fi beats, and Adrien, you play classical music. No algorithm would put all of you in the same playlist.”

“What about...” Mylene started. Ivan coughed loudly with his booming voice and grabbed the others’attention. Mylene pressed on, “What about doing something hero-related, for Heroes’ Day? Nath and Marc’s comics are awesome! And we have some great cosplayers in the class too,” she pointed out, as she dedicated a smile to Sabrina.

“Like, hosting a convention?” Ivan asked.

“I love the idea,” Sabrina said. “But it would be super costly, small conventions do it out of love, but they don’t actually make a profit.”

“This is about making money, not losing it!” Chloe said simply. 

Juleka mumbled something indistinct. Rose seemed to catch on and engaged in whisper-conversation with her.

At that point, Marinette came sprinting, clashing head on with Kim’s back, and landing squarely on her butt. Alya had told her the previous night about the MHA’s plans, so a quick briefing was more than enough to get her up to date.

“Juleka has an idea,” Rose announced.

“It’s silly, really,” Juleka said, fixing her bangs. 

“I think it’s awesome!” Rose pressed.

“Do tell us, Juleka!” Marinette beamed, as she marched towards her friend and squished her shoulder warmly. “As class representative, I insist on hearing it out. Liberté, égalité, fraternité! Your words are important!”

Juleka blushed, took a deep breath and started, “You know the platform Patreon, right? We could set up a class patreon, and do all of this stuff, and put it up there, and, you know, get people to pay per post, or monthly.”

“I like it, it’s a lot less face-threatening too,” Nathaniel said, “I can work better if I’m not thinking also of managing social interaction.”

Juleka nodded emphatically. 

“It’s amazing! We don’t need to choose one thing to do! And among all of us, we can create a lot of content, and get a lot of people on board! And there’ll be something to appeal to everyone’s tastes!” Mari approved.

“And you can engage people with polls, and take requests, and keep them engaged. Or hooking them up to higher tiers to pay more for more exclusive content!” Chloe relished.

“And,” said Alya, “there’s something else we can do like that. Hear me out: This project is about supporting akuma victims and preventing akumatization. D'you know what we all have that can help with that? Akuma experience.”

For the first time in the morning, there was silence.

“I was akumatized first, and I felt so alone, and guilty. Good things came out of it,” Ivan said, as he pressed Mylene’s hand on his own, “but it was awful, and I was very scared. And it happened twice in a row, I was afraid it’ll continue happening on and on, and I’ll become a villain’s minion permanently, against my will.” He paused for a moment, to gather his thoughts. Everyone was listening intently. “But I wasn’t re-akumatized again, mostly. Because you guys went through the same experience, and we talked it out, and you reassured me it wasn’t my fault, and made sure I felt less lonely.” At this Mylene hugged him and he could not elaborate any more. 

Nino said, “We can do that for other people, share our testimonies, to help them understand how it was, and what were the motivations. And reassure them if they have already been akumatized.”

“Or help them identify the signs and seek help, if they are at risk,” said Rose.

“Or even help them deal with loved ones being akumatized,” said Adrien. “I haven’t been targeted yet, but I was an akuma vinctim's target more than once. And I’ve seen all my friends and family get possessed by Hawkmoth. That can be a trigger too.”

“We can also share how we cope. That can be helpful too. And we all have very different strategies,”added Alix. “This idiot and I,” she said pointing at Kim (“hey!”), “like to exercise and race. But Rose and Mylene have happy songs to keep them calm, and Mme Bustier taught us a lot of cool exercises to cool down.”

“I’m glad you’ve found them useful,” the teacher said, entering the classroom, “and I’m sorry to interrupt, but it’s time to start work. Shall we?”

“Can I say one more thing?” Alya asked. The teacher nodded. “OK, everyone. Take time to think what content you’d like to produce for our Patreon, and tell me at the end of the day, so we can make a list, get sorted out at start work!”

***

Later that day, Alya, Nino and Marinette flipped through the class's ideas, as they videocalled Adrien and munched on yesterday’s pastries in Marinette’s room. 

“Thif if grea’!” Alya said through a mouthful of croissant. She swallowed. “Everyone has great ideas and most people are willing to share their akuma experience!”

“Max says,” Nino said looking at his phone, “that if everyone can get their people to be patrons, you know, family, friends, fellow fandom, followers, etc... we can get a big base of patrons and actually make good money!”

“We can start recording the videos of the akuma testimonies and release them once every few days. And everyone can start working on their series and each can update biweekly,” said Marinette.

“Why biweekly? Isn’t that a lot of time without content?”Adrien wondered.

“Not at all!””answered Alya, highlighter in hand. “We have sixteen series so there will be content everyday!”

“And it will be quality content, because everyone will have two weeks to prepare!” Nino beamed, signature fistpump for flare and all.

“How about the setup? I can work my baking from the bakery, and Kitty section records from Anarka’s boat. Marc and Nath’s are making a comic series,” Marinette continued listing, “Adrien has his grand piano in his amazing room, and looks so good and I’m sure everything he does looks excellent... eep!” She blushed hard and resumed,”Nino won’t show his face because he’s making playlists and mixes and you have your vlongging setup of the Ladyblog. But what about the others? And the akuma victim videos?” she pressed. 

“I have good news!” said Nino scrolling his phone, “The school agreed to lend us the art room and their video setup, and Chloe says she’s donating light circles for everyone recording from home. And Max says he’s installing video editing software in everyone’s laptops!”

“Can you send me a copy of the list of what everyone’s doing? I can contact everyone to see when they’d be ready to first deliver their series, and work out a posting schedule from there,” said Adrien.

“I’m on it!” Alya replied.

Nino continued texting people to confirm what they were doing and what resources they had managed to secure, while the girls continued browsing at the list, to work out what else they might need.

“Chloe is so Chloe. But her idea is good. She is always getting expensive stuff, and unboxing videos are very popular. And so are the so-called _satisfying videos._ ” Alya made a grimace.

“You mean like, slime, and cutting soap and that sort of thing? She certainly has the fake nails to do it!” Marinette laughed. 

“Well, you are very you, baker girl. Recipes, and cooking videos, and cake auctions... you sure you don't want to talk about it?” Alya asked.

Marinette shook her head. She was indeed embarrassed that Lila the liar had played her like a fiddle, but also, she didn’t want to risk compromising her secret identity. She knew too many things an ordinary civilian wasn’t supposed to.

“No pressure, girl,” Alya reassured her, and continued reading the list of Everyday Heroes. She really liked the nickname she scribbled at the top of the page, and hoped it would stick. “It’s great that Mylene wants to overcome her stage fright, and if her dad is coaching her, I’m sure her impersonations will be hilarious.”

“Also, she can start with her strongest one, and then we can carry a poll so patrons vote who she’ll be impersonating next!” Mari said.

“Oi, guys!” Adrien's metallic voice came in, “Kagami says she can make her origami tutorial in a couple of days, so that can be our first video!”

“Awesome,” Alya said, as she checked the fencer’s name in the list. “Origami with a cute native Japanese, I’m loving it already.”

“I think that Alix and Kim’s idea of making challenges can be dangerous. They should tell us beforehand, so we can veto eating hot chillis or climbing the Eiffel tower, or crazy stuff that could get them killed.”

“True that, but I think mostly they’ll be doing silly things like fitting marshmallows on their mouths and running in each other shoes. Oh! They could have a running gag of having a security team!”

They cackled unattractively. Either nervous or whizzing in anticipation with their friends shenanigans, they weren’t very sure.

“Max and the Couffaines are setting up a Patreon page,” Nino updated.

“Sweet,” acknowledged Mari. “Luka wanted to make a series teaching how to play songs in the guitar, right? That’s very sweet of him! On top of collaborating with Kitty Section too! And this, he’s really invested in helping us, he shouldn’t have!”

Alya put her hand on her friend’s lap and shuffled closer for confidentiality. “The thing is,” she said, “this project is every bit his own as it is ours. He’s part of the MHA, along with Nino, Max, Kim, Kagami and yours truly.”

Marinette looked at the brunette quizzically. Her friend elaborated, “We all were temp miraculous holders, helping LB and CN. But we can’t anymore, so we are trying to find ways to make ourselves useful.”

Marinette was at a loss for words. “That’s... that’s... Wow, Alya.”

“Everyday Heroes, right?” Alya smiled, “so Rose’s scrapbooking can be very popular too, I’ve seen tons of videos like that on insta. And stream gaming with you, Max and Adrien? That’s sweet, epic content. Are you sure you can juggle it all girl?”

“Yeah,” Mari answered, “that’s just scheduled playtime with friends, I’m sure it will do me some good. What about you? You are running the Patreon, your Ladyblog extra content and polls for this project, and hosting the Q&As with Aurore and Myrelle. On top of everything else you usually do. Is it going to work out for you?”

“Don’t worry about me, I’ve juggled worse,” Alya huffed. 

“Sabrina says,” Nino announced then, “that her friends are going to help her cosplay all of Paris' heroes. And they want to visit children’s hospitals when they are done.”

“Well, that sounds like uwu material to me. Extra points if they continue doing genderbent cosplay,” Alya said, making finger hearts. 

“I think,” Nino said, “that everyone should decide where they want to shoot their akuma victim video. It’s super important that they are comfortable and feel supported, and also that it is, as my bright girlfriend said, uwu material.”

“I’ll text everyone so they can give that a thought,” Adrien offered. “I have a diffusion list going on anyway.”

“No news of Lila?” it was hard for Marinette to keep the derisive tone out of her voice.

“Nope,” Nino finger gunned at her.

“It’s better that way,” Mari said under her breath.

“Guys,” there came Adrien’s voice again, “I only need you to confirm your content, and our posting schedule will be ready.”

And so that day, the MWA project became something bigger, wackier and more precious. It became the Everyday Heroes’ Alliance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The aforementioned list:
> 
> Agreste, Adrien: make piano covers (patrons can suggest songs), teach Chinese. Tell about father’s, bodyguard’s and Wayhem’s akumatizations.  
> Bourgeoise, Chloe: make satisfying videos (cut soap, slime, unboxing, etc). Wants to tell about Mayor’s Bourgeois’akuma but not her own.  
> Bruel, Ivan: Kitty Section. Tell about Stoneheart and lyrics writing.  
> Cesaire, Alya: Polls for future Ladyblog articles. Tell about her akumas, and journaling.  
> Couffaine, Juleka: Kitty Section. ???  
> Dupain-Cheng, Marinette: Baking (recipes, cooking videos, auction resulting cakes, etc). Doesn’t wanna talk about expulsion.  
> Haprele, Mylene: Impersonations. Tell about akuma. Roleplay for confidence  
> Kante, Max: stream gaming w/ Mari and Adrien. Poll for ideas and create an app. Tells about akuma.  
> Kurtzberg, Nathaniel: Comic collab with Mark. Doesn’t wanna tell.  
> Kubdel, Alix + Le Chien, Kim: challenges. Tell about akumas.  
> Lahiffe, Nino: playlists and mixes. Tells about akumas.  
> Lavillant, Rose: Kitty Section. Scrapbooking. Tells about akuma.  
> Raincomprix, Sabrina: cosplay. Tells about akuma.  
> Rossi, Lila: ????  
> Tsurugi, Kagami: origami. Tells about akuma.  
> Couffaine, Luka: teach to play songs (poll). Kitty section. Tells about akuma.  
> Aurore Boreal: Tells about akuma. Willing to make Q&A and bring Myrelle.


	3. The one where the world learned Kitty Section are dorks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Everyday Heroes alliance makes their first post. How will the world receive them?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I updating like mad? Yes. Do I beta any of this? No. Should we be happy this is how I use my holiday time? I think so. Please enjoy, and leave coments! Your feedback is greatly appreciated!

In the end, they decided that the first thing they should post would be Ivan’s testimony and a video from Kitty Section's series. Nath, Alya, Nino, Mylene and Rose were looking at the former now, to see if they’d approve the final version. It was important that the akuma victim videos, especially the first one they’d upload, would do good. They sat on the floor at the school library and Nino connected his laptop to the TV set and pressed play.

On the screen, there appeared Ivan. He was sitting on a bench in the shade of his grandma’s house’s garden, Mylene by his right, and Luka by his left. Alya was sitting on a stool opposite to them.

_ “My name is Ivan Bruel,” he started, “I’m 15 years old, and I attend 4th year at College Francoise Dupont. This is my girlfriend, Mylene,” she squished his hand reassuringly, “this is my friend and bandmate Luka, and that’s our friend Alya. I want to tell you about how I was the first person ever to become akumatized.” _

_ “That was last year, right, Ivan?” Luka asked. _

_ “Yeah, it was in September, when classes started. Mylene and I had been chatting a lot during the summer holidays, and I got the biggest crush on her.” _

_ “Oh, Ivan. I really enjoyed that summer too, and I was nervous about seeing you face to face again.” _

_ “Exactly! Me too. What if we weren’t put in the same homeroom this year?” _

_ “But you were! You are the cute couple in our class!” said Alya with a wink. _

_ “The thing is, I was very insecure, and a friend made jokes about my crush, and I found it hard to handle. I was ashamed, and angry, and scared that Mylene wouldn’t want to hang out with me. Then I was sent to the principal’s office, and one thing piled up on top of the other.” _

_ “And that’s when you were akumatized?” _

_ “Yeah, actually I don’t remember anything between that and when I regained consciousness at the football stadium. It was very confusing. Remember, no one had experienced anything like that before, it was even before Hawkmoth introduced himself.” _

_ “I remember that I walked with you back to school,” Alya said, “I was super excited to have seen real heroes with my very two own eyes, and have footage of it on top!” _

_ “Yeah, when you showed me the video I was really shocked, these cool guys battling a huge rock monster. But nothing could’ve prepared me to see the monster transform back into...” _

_ “...into you,” Mylene finished. _

_ “I’m sorry, Ivan. I was so starry-eyed, fangirling over Ladybug and Chat Noir that I never stopped to consider your feelings properly.” _

_ “It’s OK Alya. It was good that I heard from you before I went back to school, or saw my family.” _

_ “But that’s not the end of the story, right?” Luka offered. _

_ “No,” Ivan chuckled. “So, the next day at school, first thing everyone does is drill me with questions. I had no answers. Was I getting insane? Was I becoming the Hulk? So I became scared, angry and humiliated all over again, only now I had more reasons.” _

_ “I was so worried about you, but I didn’t know what to do,” Mylene said softly. “I’m sorry I wasn’t brave enough to reach out back then.” _

_ “Thanks, Mylie,” Ivan smiled. “I went to the locker room and put me headphones on. Music always helps me cool down,” she said as he looked at Luka. _

_ “That was a good move, buddy. Music goes directly to the feelings and is very powerful,” Luka offered his fist to pump. _

There was a whimper, and Nino paused the video there. 

“Is everything alright, Rose?”

“It’s just that, their interactions are so cute!” Rose wailed, “I really love my band! I love you too guys!” she said, as she tackled Mylene and Alya into a bear hug.

“Shall we continue?” Nino said.

“Yeah, I want to see the rest. I’ve never heard Ivan tell the story,” Nath said.

“What do you think of the aesthetic so far?” Alya asked the ginger.

“I like the lightning, it’s very soft and warm, and the different camera angles work well, the transitions are smooth, and they keep the video interesting. Now press play, Nino!”

_ “Did music work?” Mylene asked. _

_ “Yeah, but what really helped me was Marinette. She’s another friend of ours, and the class representative. She must have followed me, and she was very sweet and gave me some advice.” _

_ “What did Mari tell you Ivan?” Alya inquired. _

_ “Well, she seemed to know I liked Mylene, and she encouraged me to talk to her. I said I was no good with words, but she suggested I express myself in some other way. So I decided to write Mylene a song. I got super excited, because I have a hard time expressing myself, but I’ve always written lyrics, and I had told Mylene about that before.” _

_ “One thing I hadn’t told Ivan before,” Mylene said, “is that I get sensory overload. I was very self-conscious. So it was rather unfortunate.” _

_ “Yeah, we laughed about it now, but it was... not good at the time. I played a track on my phone, at full volume and sang my lyrics at the top of my lungs. Poor Mylene just covered her ears and ran away.” _

_ “No way!” Alya said. _

_ “That’s when you became re-akumatized, right?” Luka asked. _

_ “And all the other stone beings came to life!” Mylene supplied.  _

_ ‘Apparently, it was a rookie mistake from our heroes. They hadn’t captured the akuma, and it multiplied. Remember this was their first fight ever!“ Alya pointed out. _

_ “That’s the Ladyblogger for you,” Luka said as he smiled to Alya, “They must have been confused and scared too,” he pondered.  _

_ “I know for a fact I was,” Mylene said. “Seeing Ivan like that again broke my heart. And roleplaying Betty Ross was never my kink, so...” _

“Mylene, you’re so bold!” Rose marvelled.

“I thought I better said it myself rather than let people say it behind my back,” Mylene replied with dignity.

__

_ “I don’t remember much, that is, before suddenly free-falling, head first, from the Eiffel Tower,” Ivan was saying, scratching his neck. _

_ “Oh, yes, did it once, not doing it again,” Mylene agreed emphatically. _

_ “How did you two talk things out after that?” Alya asked. _

_ “Yes, I mean, Ladybug showed Mylen the lyrics I wrote, and things cleared out.” _

_ “I’m happy for you too. Clear communication is so important,” Luka said, “Ivan, do you want to tell us more about writing lyrics? You and Rose are the main lyricists in the band.” _

_ “Well, I like putting down what’s in my head, or in my heart. I think that if they are honest, they are really powerful, and can help get ideas across.” _

_ “I agree, and you have a knack for meter and rhyme, Ivan,” Luka complimented. _

_ “I still like Rose’s lyrics better, but I know my lyrics are honest, and they express stuff that... Stuff that’s not so easy to say to me, but sometimes lyrics find a way, and that makes me feel better.” _

_ ”I like your lyrics,” Mylene said. _

_ “Art heals, and it’s really powerful,” Alya commented, “do you have any advice for people who don’t like their own art?” _

_ “Well, they should keep on doing it all the same,” Ivan said slowly, “if they do it a lot, they’ll like it better eventually. But just getting stuff off your chest is good enough.” _

_ “This is all for today, thanks everybody!”Alya addressed the camera, “Especially, thanks to you Ivan, for sharing your story!” Ivan blushed, and all friends waved at the camera. _

.

“That was really cute!” Rose said.

“Myvan is my OTP,” agreed Nath.

“I still ship Ladynoir the hardest, but you guys are in my top 5,” Alya giggled.

“Luka was really good, I’m glad he was there,”Mylene said, “he’s such a good friend to Ivan, and his presence is very calming.”

They all agreed Ivan’s akuma victim video was good to go. They took a bathroom break, and Rose brought some drinks from the cafeteria. Half an hour later they settled again to look at the second video, the one about Kitty Section’s series. It was going to be dubbed “Kitty section: behind the scenes”, and feature clips from the band’s rehearsals and their songs. Again, Nino pressed play and they started watching. Rose’s face came in the foreground. You could see in the background that they were in Anarka’s boat. Ivan was drumming and the Couffaines were tuning their instruments.

_ “Hello! I’m Rose Lavillant and I’m the lead singer of Kitty Section, your neighbourly unicorn-punk-core band!” She then panned the camera to show the others. _

_ “Say ‘hi’, Kitty Section,” she indicated. They waved and greeted. _

_ “We wanted to sing a song to you, but we haven’t made up our minds yet!” she confided in the camera. _

_ “I still think we should do a punk classic,” Ivan was saying. _

_ Juleka mumbled something, and Luka answered, “Yeah, but that song’s not ready yet. What about..?” _

_ As they continued arguing, Rose panned the camera again at her, shook her head, and placed it in the tripod. She stood in a power stance and started singing. _

_ “I'm so dumb, I should have just told you / What I l wanted to sing was about unicorns / Now the moment’s gone forever / But I guess what does it matter / When I just, just had all of you there / Oh I just had all of you there with me, my friends / If you're even my friends,” Rose sang, holding her hand to her chest, and putting dramatic faces. They all started laughing, but Juleka started playing the bass riff, and soon Luka followed. Ivan joined with an epic drum break before the next stanza. _

“Girl, is that the Adventure time song?”Alya asked.

“It is!” Nath interjected happily

_ Rose sang on, “What am I to you? / Do you look down on me cause I'm small? / Do you think that I don't understand? / I just wanted us together and to play as a band / Last night was the most fun I've ever had / Even liked it when the two of you would get mad at each other,” Rose kept on singing as she pointed at the sibling duo. _

_ “Oh, you are my best friends in the world,” Rose sang as she twirled around, “You are my best friends in the world / That's right, I'm talking about the two of you guys, / And you Ivan / I wanna sing a song to you and I refuse to make it fake!” _

_ Then Luka launched in an epic guitar solo for 4 bars, then he nodded to Juleka and she did a solo too. Then it was Ivan's turn and he dished some break magic music of his own. _

_ “My best friends in the world!” Rose sang in a guttural voice. At that, Juleka started laughing so hard she fell off, and they stopped playing. Rose ran to her. _

_ “I’m fine!” Juleka said as Rose helped her up. _

_ “My best friends in the world!” Luka sang. _

_ “My best friends in the world!” Ivan choired.  _

_ The girls laughed. Then the screen went blank. _

Everyone was laughing.

“Rose, you have mad impro skills. Did you guys rehearse the song beforehand?” Mylene asked.

“No, we didn’t! They just made it up as we went. Those guys are so talented!” Rose beamed. ”We actually recorded some other songs after that, but we liked this bit best.”

“That’s a good call,” Nath said. “You can tell it’s honest and not scripted. And it’s hilarious.”

So it was settled. 

***

Later that day, their first patrons, mostly family and friends, had access to this material. There was a really good response. Max’s alert system was flooded with all the activity, so he had to write to Alya, who was acting as a moderator, so she could browse through the comments.

Marinette’s phone rang at around 4a.m. She jumped awake, akuma alerts drilled into her being. But it was Alya calling. She had the worst bed head ever, but she was glowing.

“Mari! Were you sleeping? Of course you were sleeping! I’m so sorry! But I’m so happy! We had 47 patrons yesterday afternoon, right? We have 103 patrons now! And there is the longest comment thread in the videos! Did you know Jagged Stone is one of our patrons? He pledged 100 euros per post”

“Yeah, I wrote to his assistant, Penny Rolling, yesterday,” Marinette slurred, ‘looks like she got Jagged on board. I’m happy!“

“Happy? Girl! Be thrilled! Jagged posted about our Patreon on social media! And patrons are flooding our gates!”

Marinette rolled in bed and snuggled into a comfortable position, “Wow! That’s so cool! Read to me your favourite comments.”

“I like this one a lot,” Alya said, “A user called princessbubbline says: ‘OMG, Kitty Section in my new favourite band! They are so talented?! And absolute dorks?! And so attractive?! Did I already say talented?! They erradicated akumas in a 100-mile radius around my house! Can’t wait for their next update!’ That’s so wholesome! Can you imagine that? There’s another... wait a sec... here! Another user called croissantnoir says: ‘I was actually turned into one stone being! I never talked about it with anybody. Thanks for sharing Ivan! You’re such a sweet kid, I’m so sad something like this happened to you! It comes to show Hawkmoth is a heartless villain. You are truly a victim, and not a villain or a minion. And if that’s true for you, it must be true from me! Oddly, I feel a way off my chest writing this. I’m looking forward to seeing your content, Everyday Heroes!’ Isn’t that sweet? What were the chances of having that person become one of our patrons? I mean...”

On gushed Alya, until she had to acknowledge her friend had fallen asleep, and that she should follow suit. She laid in bed, closed her eyes and smiled, a warmth in her chest from knowing they were doing good. 


	4. The one when Kagami unwittingly made Adrien cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New content is up, and the Everyday Heroes Alliance (EHA) 's Patreon is flooded. Managing the information becomes important, and worn out-heroes wear their heart on their sleeves. Some djwifi, adrino, adrigami and adriennete for the soul.

The school day was about to finish, and golden light bathed the city’s skyline. Some members of the EHA were at the art room, updating on their page the information about the NGOs shortlisted to be recipients of the funds they’d raise. Kim and Kagami had been visiting their facilities--Tomoe Tsurugi’s car lurking in the corner--and Max had been cross referencing their online activity. Patrons were invited to vote which ones they considered most useful, appealing, closer to their hearts--still working on the wording. Alix had suggested that they open a thread for patrons to point to other NGOs that EHA should take into consideration and they were juggling with the wording of that part too.They were also debating whether to tell their patrons that they would feed that info to and algorithm that also considered geographic location of akuma attack to distribute the funds proportionally. Someone suggested using linktree too. 

Yet another point of discussion was whether to upload that information before or after the next video scheduled. Which would be more engaging? What mood would they be in? There were four videos up by now, including Kagami’s origami tutorial and Nino’s testimony about the Bubbler. Marinette hadn’t had time to watch either, because she had spent the night chasing an akuma that turned out to be a little girl whose dog had been run over and had very graphic nightmares. She had nightmares too after that. _That heartless Hawkmoth and his penchant for profiting from people’s pain and robbing her of her sleeping time...._

“Whose video is scheduled next, anyway?”Alix asked.

“Let me check,” Max replied, “it’s... Adrien’s piano cover” 

“Wasn’t he at school still? We could ask him his opinion. He has a lot of experience at managing the audience,” Chloe pointed out, “with his professional social media and all.”

That brought Marinette out of her sleepless stupor. “I’ll go fetch him.” She was feeling quite useless, the gears of her brain not turning fast enough to meaningfully engage in the debate. She could run errands alright, though.

But Adrien had already left the locker room, she was told. M. D'Argencourt hadn’t seen him. He was not in the cafeteria, or in homeroom. Marinette was climbing the stairs, on the off chance that he’d decided to go to the terrace or to see M. Damocles. And there he was sitting alone in a nook under the staircase.

“Hey, Adrien!” she called. He jumped like a scaredy cat, and almost dropped his phone. “Oh, I’m sorry I’ve startled you! I was looking for you.”

“It’s OK, what’s the matter?”

“The guys wanted your opinion about something. What are you up to? Is.. everything alright?”

He scratched his neck. “It’s fine, it’s just... I haven’t seen the last videos, and I didn’t wanna watch them at home, so I figured..”

“Oh, yeah, sure. I haven’t seen them either,” she said. She could think of a number of reasons why he wouldn’t want to see the video about the Bubbler incident at home, where the events had taken place, under the watch of his father, who incited the incident. But, why not watch it with the others, sure, they were busy... would they make comments about him and Kagami...?

“D’you wanna watch it with me?” he offered, interrupting her train of thought.

“I’d love to,” she replied, as she plummeted next to him. “Cozy,”she joked.

He held his phone in front of them and reopened the video player tab. He pressed play.

Nino was in his room, sitting on the bed and hugging a pillow. Alya was lounging by his side, and Adrien was sitting in the computer chair, squishy ball in one hand. Kagami was sitting on an elegant rug on the floor, her legs elegantly folded underneath her. Marinette assumed she was there in the role of ‘the one that didn’t experience the episode’, and to give Adrien extra support. The composition was dynamic and some soft Lo-fi tune was playing.

_“I’m Nino Lahiffe,” he started, “and I turned 15 years old in July. My family and I moved to France when I was very little. This lovely lady here’s my girlfriend Alya. That handsome dude over there’s my best bud Adrien. And our fearless friend Kagami is here with us today. I want to tell you about how I became akumatized as the Bubbler.”_

_“I hadn’t moved to France yet,” Kagami said, “but I remember seeing photos on TV, back in Japan. There were these big floating bubbles with people inside them. You were one of the first akuma victims, weren’t you?”_

_“Yes, it was the 4th of September, barely a few days into the school year,” Nino confirmed._

_“Isn’t that your birthday, Adrien?” she asked, puzzled._

_“Kagami, you’re sharp! I should enlist your journalistic talents!”Alya beamed, “These two events are interconnected, in fact.”_

_“You see, I had started school for the first time ever that year. I’ve always been homeschooled before, and I didn’t have many friends my age. Only one, as a matter of fact. Nino was my benchmate, and he decided he should take matters in his own hands and become a good friend to me. I’m really lucky.”_

_Nino threw his pillow at Adrien, “You’ll make me blush, dude,” he said, covering his face._

_Adrien threw his squishy ball at Nino, “You’re the best friend I could ever hope for. Own it!”_

_“Isn’t it a bromance for the ages?” Alya shot at Kagami, who just tilted her head confused._

_“The thing is, I found out Adrien's b-day was that very same week,” Nino continued, “You know the dude’s got his own wiki, so you cannot enlist my journalistic talents, Alya.”_

_They all laughed. “I imagined he’d throw a lavish party or something, be really busy, you know, but as his new friend I wanted to say hi. I was shocked when he told me his dad wouldn’t let him celebrate in any way!”_

_“I see,” Kagami nodded._

_“And overprotective boy here wouldn’t let his sunshine friend’s birthday go unsung without putting up a fight,” Alya commented._

_“What did you do?” Kagami wanted to know._

_“I confronted Gabriel Agreste and asked him to let us celebrate.”_

_“He just marched up to THE Gabriel Agreste and demanded he be chill,” Alya said, hugging her boyfriend._

_“You are a fearless friend, Nino,” Kagami said with reverence._

_“Of course he wasn’t chill, and kicked me out,” Nino resumed. “I was working myself up, and I was akumatized. Next thing I know, I’m with everyone at Adrien’s and there are Ladybug and Chat Noir, comforting me over something I didn’t remember.”_

_“Hawkmoth targets people who are experiencing strong emotions. Nino was angry and frustrated on my behalf, and Hawkmoth preyed on that. His akuma just wanted to throw a party for me!”_

_“What about the bubbles?” Kagami asked._

_“Well,” Alya said, “the other thing the Bubbler did was to send away adults, so that they didn’t oppress the children. Hence the bubbles.”_

_“I didn’t know that last part at the time, actually,” Adrien added, “so at first I actually enjoyed the party. Even as an akuma, Nino makes the best mixes.”_

_“I’m not owning up that compliment,” Nino said._

_“Then I noticed how nobody was actually happy,” Adrien told them, “ I didn’t have a lot of social skills, but even I knew you don’t coerce people to be your friends and enjoy your birthday party.”_

“I didn’t know you felt like that,” Marinette said. She patted tentatively his shoulder.

“Yeah,” he said. They didn’t know what else to say, so they turned their attention to the screen again.

_“What happened then?” Kagami asked._

_“Ladybug and Chat Noir saved the day!” Alya said. Nino made a fist pump, though it somewhat lacked flare. “So what do you think we can learn from your experience, babe?”_

_“I think that is unrealistic to try and not experience strong stuff. Injustice and tragedies happen no matter what. And it’s not OK not to care. We should care. We should respond, and act. But it’s not OK to simmer in anger, or, you know, get worked up and caught up in any challenging emotion. You just make it bigger, and it makes you sloppy, clumsy, and prone to hurt others. And now, that also attracts a terrorist’s attention, there’s an ax-crazy dude out there, weaponizing those feelings.” Nino paused for breath. And then he pressed on, “What I’m saying, my dudes, it’s that we need to get more emotionally intelligent, as well as kind, and humble. There’s people out there who know about this stuff, and we want to help them to get to you, through EHA. But talk to your people too, vent out. Work it out. If you can look at your own feelings and thoughts from a quieter place, things work out better.”_

_“That’s very insightful, Nino,” Kagami said, “very buddhist too. It resonates with me.”_

_Nino offered a fist for her to bump, which she did some moments too late. It was cute._

_“I think this is all for today,” Alya said, “thank you all, guys, and thanks to Nino for opening up to us!” They all waved at the camera, and the image faded out, Lo-fi tune persisting a little longer._

“That was a nice video,” Marinette said. “It was a good idea to bring Kagami, I think.”

“Yeah, she is great,” he grinned.

“Shall we watch her tutorial?” she asked, “I’m sure she’s eager to hear your feedback!”

Adrien tapped his phone and opened the other video. The aesthetics were very different. There was a Japanese garden, with cherry trees in bloom, and a pond with koi fish and a little red bridge. Kagami came in shuffling from one side, in a red kimono. She did a courtesy and sat in front of a low table. They knew that she recorded from home with a green screen background, but the lights and the editing were very well-done, so it was easy to buy into the illusion.

_“Hello. I’m Kagami Tsurugi. I’m 16 years old, and I’m from Japan. I’m part of the Everyday Heroes Alliance, and I’m very thankful for my friends. I’m very happy to be here today, and share with you a traditional Japanese artform. Origami is the art of creating sculptures out of folded paper. It can be as simple as a paper plane,” she said holding up a tiny one and sending it flying off, ”or as complex as the human imagination allows,” then she grabbed something from under the table. It was a dragon, with detailed scales, facial expression and whiskers._

‘“Did she make that one?” Marinette wondered.

“I think her cousin made it for her. It’s usually sitting around in their living room.”

“Still, wow,” she marvelled.

_“Today,” Kagami said, “I teach you a simple, elegant and meaningful origami. The crane,” she lifted a little crane with both her hands and showed it to the camera, “Shall we get started?”_

__

_Then the camera angle changed, so that you could see Kagami’s hands, as if it was filmed from above her._

_“We start with a paper square. I’m using origami paper, which has a colourful print on one side. First, we fold it in half, print-side out.”_

_She continued explaining slowly and patiently the steps, making sure her hands didn’t obstruct the view._

“She really does a good job explaining,” Adrien said.

“And even her hands are so pretty,” Marinette sighed, “I wish I had a piece of paper on me right now. So that I could fold a crane.”

_“Finally,” Kagami was saying, “you flip it like this. These long pieces are the neck, and the tail. You just have to fold them, like this. These bigger flaps are the wings, you fold them up, like this.”The camera angle changed again, so that Kagami was facing it. “Congratulations! You’ve folded a crane. Shall we fold some more, for practice?” The screen then divided into two cameras, one showing Kagami’s hands, and the other facing the front. “In the meantime, I’ll tell you a story.”_

_“Origami cranes are well-known all around the world as a symbol for peace. There’s the real-life story of Sadako Sasaki, and the legend of the 1000 cranes. Sadako was a baby at the time of the nuclear bombings, and she fell ill with leukemia when she was a teen. With her friends and family, she folded cranes, because the legend says, if you fold one thousand cranes, you can make a wish. Ask for a miracle.” She had just finished a crane, and picked up a new paper square.“ It would be lovely had Sadako not died a little later. Did they really believe the legend? That we may never know. But I think this,” her hands stopped moving for a little while, “I think,” she resumed, ”this is a story about patience, and resilience. We are told that the brave ones fight hard. We are told, ‘Be proactive!’But sometimes you cannot do anything but wait. Sadako had to sit in the hospital, follow the treatment, and be patient. Folding cranes helped, I’m sure. It’s a form of meditation. Waiting requires a different type of bravery. More subtle, but just as difficult. Sometimes that’s how you fight, being patient, keeping busy, doing what you have to do, biding your time.” Another crane was finished. “My great-grandfather was an abusive parent. He would hit my grandmother, and get drunk. She came home from school and locked her bedroom door, she studied, she kept busy, and she got a job and moved out as soon as she could. I think she was a very brave girl, just as Sadako.”_

_There was another camera change, so that only the front-facing angle was on screen. “I have a few cranes now. You can sew them together on a string,” she said as she started to do so, “like this.” She smiled at the camera. “People in Japan hang crane threads in Sadako’s peace memorial. You can hang them in a public place or at home, Maybe they will remind you to be patient, and stay brave.”_

At that point, Adrien started sobbing hard. Marinette put her arms around his shoulders gingerly. They missed the end of the video, but they could catch up later.

“Hey, I’m here with you OK,” she whispered softly, “It’s OK... or maybe, it’s not? It’s OK if it's not OK...” she could curse herself, but plowed on “What I mean is, I’m your friend, and I’m here, you are not alone. And I’m not letting go of you, at least, until you want me to!”

He may have wanted to say something, but he was sobbing very hard. He returned her embrace, and they stayed like that for a while. At some point, Alix came up the stairs looking for them, but she saw the scene, and after exchanging some quick hand gestures with Marinette, she went down. Eventually, the sobbing subsided,

“I’m sorry... about this,” Adrien said in a hoarse voice.

“You have nothing to apologise about, OK? Those videos were packed with feels.”

“Overkill,” he chuckled.

“You can tell me about it, you know. If you want, when you are ready. I’m here,” she reassured him softly. They separated.

“What do you say,” she offered, “shall we walk it out?”

He looked around, night had already fallen. “It’s late, shall I walk you home? I can ask my bodyguard to pick me up there...”

“Awesome!”

So they walked in comfortable silence, side by side. There was a cool breeze blowing, and that somehow made things better. Put things in perspective. Soon enough, they arrived at Tom and Sabine’s patisserie.

“Ehmm, Adrien,” Marinette started tentatively, "I’m recording my baking video this weekend, if nothing untowards comes our way...“ she shrugged her shoulders, “do you wanna come along? I’ll be needing some... quality testers!”

“Will you need any batter-bowl-cleaners?” he smiled.

“Definitely,” she said in mock seriousness, “that’s the most important position!”

They laughed.

“Can I count on you?” she asked.

“You can count on me,” he said.

His bodyguard then honked, and Adrien hurried onto the car. Feeling a little low, and tired, but thinking of cranes and cookies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can tell Headspace's Andy Puddicombe has been my rock at hard times. Thank you, Andy! I was going to give more detailed crane instructions, but that might have been too cumbersome. I want to draw a "screenshot"from Kagami's video, so, I might add that here later, or else, stay tuned to my IG @miraculous.lady.drawing where I dump lots of doodles almost daile. Thanks for stopping by! Input and feedback are greatly appreciated!


	5. The one when Adrien made Ladybug yearn for macarrons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patrol turns into a session of video watching for the weary heroes of Paris. Also, Adrien is a dork, and I love him at his most socially awkward.

Monday afternoon found the heroes of Paris patrolling. After parading around Montparnasse, they took a stroll along Champs-Elysées. It was deliberate to show themselves. To wave their hands at passers-by with a smile and their backs straightened. To reassure citizens that Ladybug and Chat Noir were looking after them. The general public’s trust was so critical to their success and so fragile. They raced to the top of the Eiffel tower, and then rested there, perched on the ledge, not exerted by the exercise but strained by the eyes on them, eyes that luckily wouldn’t follow them so high. They were hidden in the heart of Paris.

“What a week!” Ladybug sighed, as she plopped by Chat Noir’s side.

“You tell me, in between our heroics and my civilian responsibilities and… well, I can’t have slept more than 4hs on any one day,” Chat said wistfully.

“You holding up? Please take care of yourself, take a break if you need one!” she urged.

“I’ll be fine, my friends have been… very supportive, don’t worry about me,” he reassured her. “What about you?”

“Well, that akuma/amok combo on Saturday was very untoward, but stuff got re-scheduled, friends covered for me, and I don’t think it looked particularly suspicious, so…” she shrugged.

They looked down at the city they protected. Tribulations and trials seem to fade from their vantage point. Everything looked so tiny and serene. And yet, it was also the battle for the little stuff that they were fighting, not only whatever Hawkmoth wanted on the grand scheme of things. Because those were interconnected. So many fronts to cover.

“Hey, wanna hear something cool?” he said.

“Sure, I could do with a pick-me-up,” she smiled.

“Well, I dunno if you heard about’em, but there’s a group of kids, from a local school, and they’ve been seriously targeted by Hawkmoth,” he said, “like, their whole class has been akumatized at least once, even their teachers!”

“Really?” Ladybug played dumb, “that’s very unlucky!”

“The thing is they have this project to raise funds for mental health NGOs, and they are making nice content, and videos telling their akuma experience.”

“Oh, yes, the Ladyblogger is part of it, right?” Ladybug said, deciding that it was safer to exhibit some knowledge rather than feigning ignorance she didn’t actually possess. It was a leitmotif in her life, really. “I saw it advertised on the Ladyblog, now that you mention it.”

“I didn’t know you were a ladyblog browser, m’lady,” he said.

“I try to stay on top of things,” she said in mock seriousness.

“That’s why we gather here, m’lady,” he snickered.

Maybe he was really very seriously sleep deprived after all. His sense of humour and her sanity were suffering. Ladybug resisted the urge to facepalm. Instead she asked, “So, are you a patron?” She instantly regretted it.

He seemed to catch on, “I don’t think I can tell you, but I’ve been watching their content, and it’s very wholesome.”

“Yeah, me too! I think they are doing a good job, and they had the right idea, too. It’s something civilians like them can actually do without endangering anyone, and that’s actually helpful,” she offered.

“So, have you seen the latest video? It’s the model boy, Adrien Agreste, playing the piano,” he said eagerly, “what did you think about it?”

“Oh, is it up already? I haven’t seen it yet. Busy, you know...” she lamented.

‘Do you wanna watch it? I happen to have access to it,“ he bragged.

“I’d love to!” she beamed, “I admire his.. Work a lot! And I’ve... never seen him play! The piano!” she laughed nervously.

Chat opened his baton and tapped the keys for some time. _Maybe he IS a patron,_ it occurred to her, but decided not to pursue that line of thought.

He scurried closer and held his baton in front of them, she leaned over his shoulder and the video started playing. 

Adrien was in his bedroom straddling the piano stool. Warm sunlight flooded the room from the big windows behind him, making the grand piano shine. He waved at the camera.

_ “Hello, everyone! I’m Adrien and I’m a student in 4th year at College Francoise Dupont. Attending school has changed my life for the better, and I’m super happy to be part of Everyday Heroes alongside my friends. I’ve started playing piano at a very young age, mostly classical music. But through my friends I came in contact with and started to love lots of other styles, and I started playing them too!” he smiled, and scratched the back of his neck. _

_ Putting his index finger up, he continued, “So, what I’d like to share with you is that! They joy of mixing stuff we like! I want to play piano covers of music we love. I’m starting today with one of my personal favourites, but I want you to help me pick the next one, will you?” he said as he winked at the camera. He directed a rapid glance over his shoulder and made a grimace.  _

_ “Without further ado, this is ‘A town with an ocean view’ by musical genius Joe Hisaishi. It’s part of the soundtrack for Kiki’s delivery service. Awesome movie my... Kagami made me watch. Recommend it. 10/10,” he turned to sit properly at the piano and placed his fingers on the keys.  _

_ Screen splitted in two cameras, adding one showing a close-up of Adrien’s hands playing. _

“Even his hands are pretty!” Ladybug murmured.

“D’you think he’s pretty?” he huffed.

“Well, he IS a model.”

“But, will his playing be good?” Chat taunted.

She shushed him. “Let me hear!”

[ _ listen to the song _ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-tsFbF9qoY&ab_channel=ThePandaTooth)

_ The song started with the intro, rather slowly, and then jumped into a faster, upbeat theme. Adrien’s fingers danced expertly along the length of the piano. The music repeated the theme a second time, before launching with strength in a second part, more melancholy. It repeated the first theme but on a higher pitch, and then presented another upbeat theme, though there was something rather sour sweet to it. It slowed down to a stop, and surged with a strong happy new part, it soared up and up, before becoming slow and melancholy again, only to como back tothe second happy theme. And then, it playfully came to a stop.  _

“That was so beautiful!” Ladybug wailed, ‘It made me... yearn for something.. It’s like my heart broke and healed during the song! I need a macarron now!“

“I take it’s not only his face you like, then,” Chat Noir prodded.

“C’mon he could be a professional player! That boy won the talent lottery! Is there anything he doesn’t excel at?”

Ladybug focused on the video again, and Chat’s ears--the real ones--turned red.

_ “I hope you like it! This song gives me a roller coaster of feelings, and always cheers me up. What about you? Are you a Ghibli fan? Do you listen to soundtracks? Who are your favourite artists? I’ll be reading your comments, and suggestions, and we’ll carry a poll to see what I’ll be playing next time,” he finger gunned at the camera. “Thanks for helping us help our fellow citizens, and by extension, the heroes of Paris. Take care, and remember to ask for help if you are going through challenging feelings. Thanks for stopping by, it’s been my pleasure playing for you! Stay safe, and stay strong!” _

“Should I go punch him, for breaking your heart, or rather, stealing it?” Chat said, half joking, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Pfff,” she pushed his shoulder, “I’ll race you to Notre Dame,” she challenged him, and jumped off the ledge. Chat Noir jumped after her, a broad smile plastered on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now do I have a crush on ThePandaTooth? I absolutely do. Go watch their cover, because that's what I imagine Adrien's second camera would be like. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-tsFbF9qoY&ab_channel=ThePandaTooth


	6. The one when anonymous heroes did not go unsung

_On Saturday_

Marinette had sent a short text to the group chat saying that she had got caught up in the akuma attack, so the shooting of her baking video would have to be delayed for the following weekend, and pleading on her knees whoever was scheduled next if they could push their own projects forward and cover for her, she was so sorry, PLEASE. Luckily for her, Marc and Nath were up to the challenge. Mylene, Sabrina and Kim rushed to get everything ready at the school's art room while the creative duo cracked their heads trying to figure out what to do. Because of course their comic wasn't ready.

Two hours later, the impromptu technical team had successfully localised M. Damocles, got the school keys and the janitor's selfless promise to stay with them acting as responsible adult--blessed be his soul--they had also set up the lighting and a whiteboard, and procured a projector and art supplies. The writer/artist duo sat down, they gave a thumbs up, the camera started rolling.

"I'm Mark Anciel," waved the dark-haired boy to the camera. "And this is Nath Klutzberg," he said, pointing to his ginger partner.

"Chances are you haven't heard of us before. We are just two 15-year-olds attending College Francoise Dupont," Nath went on, bravely looking at the camera. "But maybe you've heard about our moderately popular webtoon, _'The adventures of Ladybug and Chat Noir_ '. If you had, thanks for reading!" There was a short but seemingly endless stretch of silence.

"How did you two start working on that?" Kim yelled helpfully.

"Well," Marc said, "Marinette set us up."

"Yeah," Nath smiled fondly, "she knew I did lots of fanart of LB and CN, and that Marc wrote fanfics, and she decided we should partner up."

"It's been a good partnership," Marc told Nath. "Maybe it didn't start as planned, but it turned out unexpectedly great!"

"Totally!" Nath agreed, offering his hand to Marc, and they started doing their secret hand jive.

"Will you do 'adventures' for us?" Sabrina yelled expectantly.

"We actually haven't got much to offer to you today," Marc apologised, "because of Marinette." He stopped, "That didn't come out right," he amended.

"We are covering for her, so our plans flew out the window," Nath said. "But it might turn out for the better," he added philosophically.

"Typical Marinette style," Marc commented.

"Typical Marinette style," Nath agreed. "So, what have we got today, my friend?"

"Well, we usually watch footage of Paris' heroes to get ideas for our webtoon. And we found something very interesting recently," Nath confided to the camera.

"When they fought Feast, for the first part, they couldn't or wouldn't transform. And they raced the akuma dressed in a banana suit, and like, a delivery guy suit," Marc gushed.

"I mean, you couldn't really tell who they were, but who else is crazy enough to chase a monster by bike…" Nath remarked as he grabbed some markers and began doodling very fast.

"And scooter!" Marc added.

"Chasing a monster by bike AND scooter," the ginger amended. "There is footage of Banana Noir and delivery Lady in other instances, too, so it's not they first time either of them had done that."

"It comes to show how awesome those guys are. They have no magical immunity, or superstrength, but that won't stop them," Marc said in a reverie. "We owe them big time," he added as an afterthought.

"Sure thing we do," Nath agreed. He put his doodles of the depowered heroes on the projector, so they were casted on the whiteboard behind them.

“That looks great!” Marc said appreciatively. Nath grinned and continued sketching at full speed.

Marc marched on, "So we came up with a concept for an exclusive series, for our Everyday Heroes Alliance's patrons."

Mylene, Sabrina and Kim cheered and clapped.

"The series is about the adventures of Bananaman and Lady Delivery,” said Marc, as Nath put the next set of doodles on the projector. 

Marc explained, “They are normal dudes fighting everyday evil." He continued, "A guy in a banana costume, maybe he does street advertising, or works in children's parties, or something like that. A girl who works with Glovo, delivering goods on her bike.”

“Probably we need to come up with some bland brand name.”

“True that,” Marc said, taking down notes. “So, no superpowers. Their enemies are like, the lady who won't restrain her biting dog at the park, and the rude guy who mistreats their family on the street."

Nath looked at his friend, "Or like neglectful people who let their baby cry at the cinema.” 

“Who take their baby to the cinema in the first place,” complained Marc, “what’s on their minds? I dunno. Pure evil.”

“It’s a Monty Pythonesque concept, you know, like, the Life of Brian,” added Nath.

“Yeah, Bananaman and Glovo Lady’s fights against everyday evil would mirror Chat Noir and Ladybug's exploits against Hawkmoth, that are like, background events in this comic.”

Nath put a different set of doodles in the projector. In some, the heroes of Paris were fighting panther!Animan, while Bananaman and Glovogirl were being chased by a poodle. In another set, Ladybug and Chat Noir confronted Gigantitan, while their counterparts dealt with a kid throwing a temper tantrum. 

Marc continued his exposition, “We are the Everyday Heroes Alliance, both us and our patrons are normal people, doing small stuff that makes a difference, a grain of sand at a time. So it makes sense to develop a story about everyday people fighting everyday evil. We want to weave into the plot how that can help the heroes' fight against big evil--of course, in a comedic and unexpected way...” 

They continued dishing out some headcanons about the dynamics of their characters, and showing the doodles that Nath made as they talked about their new series. They imagined that Bananaman and Glovo Girl (they kept changing her name) develop a friendship in costume, but are embarrassed of being seen in their outlandish work suits, so they don’t tell each other their real names. 

“Oh! Maybe Glovo Girl is a rich socialite, but she wants to see the world or become independent, like, you know, just interact with people? Because her parents have her cooped up?” Marc ventured.

“A Disney princess sort of dilemma,” Nath offered.

“Yes,” Marc nodded, “and that’s why she doesn’t want to take off her helmet, or tell him her real name!”

“And of course,” Nath said with a devilish grin, “they unwittingly have a relationship as their ‘civilian’ selves on top of that.”

Marc explained to the camera, “You may know that we like to play with the _love square_. In our story, Ladybug likes Chat in costume, but he doesn’t like her back, because his civilian self has a hopeless crush on HER civilian self.”

“For extra drama,” interjected Nath.

“Of course,” admitted Marc, “the real heroes have a very solid relationship, and we don’t know for sure if they are dating, but I don’t believe their real life is as ridiculous as that. This is fiction. Wacky fiction, for fun. Really, what are the chances?”

Mylene, Kim and Sabrina--especially Sabrina, who was a big fan of Nath and Marc’s webtoon--were fascinated with the new concept. 

“That was hilarious,” said Mylene as they were putting away the equipment, “we couldn’t stop laughing. I’m sure it was caught on video. Do you think that’ll be a problem?”

“Well,” Nath considered it, as he scratched his chin, ”it didn’t sound so loud, and the mics were oriented toward us. Alya and Nino have the final say in it, but, maybe it works like a laugh track, and the sound quality is OK, so it’s OK.”

“And your drawings are amazing,” beamed Sabrina, “I’m itching to bag them and take them home. Do you need them for working on the comic?” 

“Maybe we can auction them later,” suggested Marc, “after the character sheets and all of that is down.”

“Can I keep the Ladynoir one?” Sabrina asked, making puppy eyes.

***

On Sunday morning, Nino met Alya very early, and they checked the material Nath and Marc had sent. They had argued a little bit--not much, as Nino didn’t want to upset Alya. She insisted she should go to his place, so he didn’t need to move his expensive laptop and headset around, and he insisted he should go to her place, so she didn’t move around alone in the dangerous hours of the early morning. They finally agreed that he would pick her up early and they would go together to his place.

“Is any of this really necessary?” she complained in lieu of a greeting, after kissing his cheek.

“I feel better this way, let me have this OK?” he huffed. He grabbed her hand and they started walking at a leisurely pace. They were both quite sleepy.

“I really could have done this alone, after we shoot my video,” she insisted.

“On the one hand, they said there might be an issue with the audio, and I’m a bit more knowledgeable with that,” Nino said diplomatically. “On the other, I’m really curious about Nath and Marc’s new series, so...”

“You want the scoop!” Alya joked. “You sneaky, nosey turtle..!” she said, as she bopped his nose.

They felt silent for a bit. Nino changed the topic quickly.

“I like spending time with my beautiful, talented and kind girlfriend, OK, don’t judge me,” and kissed her cheek.

In the end, they cropped the video a little bit--extracting Kim’s yelling, mostly, and some silent bits, but not much more--and decided the video was good to go. 

“That was so much fun! Even if I really don’t buy into the _love square_ dynamic,” Alya scoffed, “Marc and Nath are well known for delivering good slapstick comedy and quality, varied, puns and wordplay. I really hate when fanfics stick to purrfect and cat-astrophic, ad nauseum.”

“Yeah, I think it looks promising!” Nino seconded, cheered to see Alya cheering up. “And the auction idea can work well too. After Adrien’s video, patrons are engaging in polls and threads a lot, right?

“Bravo for Adrien’s fangirls! If only they knew not to spam post comments I just have to take down!”

“What did that one say...?” Nino asked with a smirk.

“Well, I dunno which one you mean, but they tend to be different variations of keysmash, keymash, I want him to push my buttons, keysmash,” she said.

“Poor sunshine,” Nino laughed, half joking, half serious. “Anyhow, It’s a good moment to launch an auction, even if it’s drawings and not Marinette’s goodies...”

“Oh! I’d kill for a salted caramel macaron now!” Alya sighed.

‘We can go to Tom and Sabine’s on our way to the zoo!,“ he suggested. “I’ll text Mari. We can pick her up and go together, and she can get some treats ready!”

So after e-mailing some notes on the editing of the “Adventures of Bananaman and Glovo Girl (title in progress)” they headed to their friend’s home. Marinette was up and about, a bag with macarons, quiches and drinks ready. Nino thought her uncharacteristic wakefulness might be put down to her akuma experience the previous day, as Marinette claimed, but it probably also had a lot to do with worrying about her best-friend’s turn to share her akumatization experience with their ever-growing number of patrons. He had heard his girlfriend voice her concerns on the phone to Mari, “ _I wasn't clueless like Ivan, or selfless like Nino. What if there’s backlash over my story?_ ”

They soon arrived at the spot where they’d film. As Alya’s father worked in the zoo, it hadn’t been as hard to get a permit, and the little pergola in the shady groove was very cozy, the serene ambiance enhanced by the mid-morning sunshine and the birdsong all around. Rose and Juleka were already there and had prepared the camera, lights and seats. Soon enough, Juleka was ready to operate as today’s camerawoman, and today’s special host, Rose, was sitting alongside Alya, with Mari and Nino each on one side.

“Whenever you are ready,” Juleka said. 

Rose smiled encouragement at Alya, giving her the thumbs up. Alya sighed and started.

“Hello! My name is Alya Cesaire, and I’m 16 years old. You may know me because I run the Ladyblog, one of the best sources of information on everything concerning the heroes of Paris, if I may say so myself,” she smiled. 

“My family and I moved to Paris last year... we are originally from Martinique. I love Paris, it’s so interesting, with so many people and so much to do. It also made me happy to start a new school, and meet my current BFF, the one and only @marinettedesigned here!” said Alya making jazz hands at Marinette. Her friend smiled and did a little courtesy. “And my beautiful boyfriend Nino, who should get an IG asap. I made a lot of good friends, among them you Rose, thank you for hosting today,” she told Rose graciously, “ I’m sure our patrons know you already, because of your amazing work with Kitty Section!”

“Thanks, Alya!” Rose said, “I’m really happy that fate brought us together, and that we all became such good friends.”

“Me too,” said Alya, “I’m grateful to have you all with me everyday, but especially today, because I want to do something that’s hard for me: I want to tell about the first time I became akumatized.”

“You were one of the first people to become akumatized too, Al. Like me and Ivan, right?” Nino offered.

“That’s right,” Alya confirmed. “I had witnessed and got footage of Ladybug and Chat Noir’s first appearance, and I started the Ladyblog immediately after. I had always been a huge fan of superheroes, like Majestia, and having a first-hand experience like that... blew my mind! I was ecstatic, and that made me do a lot of dumb stuff.”

“You still do, babe, like chasing after an akuma, to get footage of the fight,” commented Nino.

“Or trying to map Chat and Ladybug’s patrol route, and patrol it yourself, to try to run into them and get to interview them,” added Marinette.

“Whether that’s dumb is up for debate, but I think we can all agree that I was a lot more... careless back them,” Alya said.

“Can you tell us what was going on the day you were first akumatized, Alya?” Rose asked.

“At that time... oh, this is hard,” Alya false-started, “OK, I’m ashamed of this. But I’ll tell you, because it’s important. I was obsessed with finding out Ladybug’s secret identity. I knew it couldn’t be made public, of course.”

“That’s standard comic-book hero procedure,” nodded Rose.

“Exactly!” agreed Alya, ‘but all the same, I wanted to know. I wanted to know more about this new hero. I felt a special connection, you see. She had saved me, I had seen her rise and conquer. I felt entitled, in a way, to her friendship.“ She made a pause, and sighed. “I mean, of course I wasn’t, but I couldn’t get the idea out of my head.”

“I’m sure Ladybug appreciates your efforts to do good, Alya,” Marinette reassured her friend, giving her a side hug, “and you’ve managed to interview her, and get to know her better since then.”

“Yeah, still. Secret identities are secret for a reason. I know that very well, believe me,” Alya said, as Nino squished her hand. “And I knew it back then, but I chose to ignore it.”

Rose gasped, “Alya, don’t tell me you managed to learn Ladybug’s true identity!”

“Well, rest assured I didn’t. But, let’s say, long story short, I got into a mess because I suspected a classmate could be Ladybug, and got suspended from school.”

“In your defence,” Nino said, “that girl had a LOT of Ladybug custom quality merchandise in her locker.”

“But she was just a fellow fan,” Alya said, “a wealthy, but ultimately unremarkable one. And definitely not the real thing. So, get the news out there, Ladybug is not a 4th year student at our school!”

“Anyhow, I was suspended,” Alya resumed, “and I felt angry, and righteously so, I thought back then... I felt I was being denied what was rightfully mine. I know that’s bullsh... that’s nonsense. But the emotion was so strong back then, and I had a common agenda with Hawkmoth, you know, finding out LB's secret identity, so I was akumatized.” She grabbed a macaron and munched on it.

“I imagine you don’t remember much until Ladybug and Chat Noir defeated the akuma,” Marinette said.

“I don’t. The first thing I did when I regained consciousness was to ask them for an interview. They are on a timer, though I didn’t know it back then, so they fled without saying much to me,“ Alya confided. “And I’m sorry to say I was delighted about the whole ordeal, because it gave me a chance to see them closer.”

“Has that changed, Alya?” Rose asked.

“Yes,” she took a deep breath, and exhaled before continuing. “Since then, I’ve been turned into that akuma form, Lady Wifi, two more times. Because of the effect of other people’s akuma, because of the difficult feelings of others, and because of Hawkmoth’s readiness to use me as a tool for his nefarious purposes,” she said with a broken voice, she was shivering. “My blind, selfish enthusiasm about the heroes put me and everybody else in danger so many times now, and my initial wrongdoing, that I now don’t defend anymore, continues coming back to bite me. It’s so ironic.”

“I can relate to that, Alya,” Rose said, “you know I do. I’m so sorry.”

“But none of that is your fault,” Marinette said. “You were just a young, over-enthusiastic schoolgirl,” she argued, “Heck, you still are just a schoolgirl.”

“Mari is right, Alya,” Nino said, “but I understand where you’re coming from. We cannot change any of that, but maybe we can help people out there avoid our mistakes. What would you like to tell them?” he prompted her.

“Fellow citizens,” Alya said, addressing the camera, each of her hands in Marinette’s and Nino’s respectively, “we need to look around us, and be compassionate, attentive and respectful of each other. Especially towards Ladybug and Chat Noir. I know they make a point of being approachable,showing themselves, and comforting us. And they truly are there for us. But that doesn’t mean we own them. That doesn’t give us a right to ask or expect anything from them. They don’t owe us attention, answering our questions, or giving us their time. They have struggles as civilians and as heroes that we know nothing about, and that we know nothing about _for our own sake_. We have to trust their judgement and respect what they do, to their best capacities, with the responsibilities they have been entrusted.”

“Of course we want a piece of them, but we are not entitled to it, we should not seek it. If we want to help them, to share in the heroics, we need to look around and do our part. We need to be kind, and generous, we need to lift each other up. We need to fight structural injustice in society, to fight for distribution of wealth, and the end of discrimination against minorities, and the violation of human rights. We need to fight climate change. There’s just so much for us to fight for in our own arena, I’m just saying, let us fight our fights, and let us allow them to fight theirs.”

“Alya, you are truly a devoted follower and knowledgeable student of heroics,” Rose said, “Thank you for sharing your insight and your story!” and with that she ran to hug her. Alya hugged her back tight.

“I guess this is all for today,” Marinette said.

“We’ll see you soon, dudes,” Nino added, “Stay safe, and stay strong!” They waved, and Juleka stopped recording before running to join the group hug.


	7. The one when  everyone was given a Miraculous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crack. Live stream crack ft Wayhem and Sabrina. Please enjoy!

On Tuesday, the EHA found themselves with no recorded material to post, but Sabrina rose heroically and offered to do a live stream. Marinette would have cried tears of gratefulness, and made a mental note to find out what pastries she liked best and send some her way. Chloe had an emergency session with her therapist via Zoom, and after mulling it over with the assistance of Mr Cuddly and Butler Jean, she told Sabrina she’d rather not participate.

“I totally understand, Chloe,” Sabrina told her. “I didn’t actually expect you to say yes. But also, I didn’t want you to feel left out. I’d really want you to join us, whenever that is OK with you.”

“OK, Sabrina, I’ll try to participate in the chat,” Chloe said. “I don’t want you to forget about me. Don’t you dare change me for your new friends!”

“Don’t worry, I could never replace you,” Sabrina smiled, “And don’t worry if it’s too much. You can disconnect, I won’t hold it over you.”

“Whatever you say,” Chloe deflected. It was hard not to fall back in the old grooves, and become hurtful and derisive. But she tried.

“And thanks for sending your stuff!” Sabrina added.

“No problem,” Chloe smiled back.

“I gotta go, Wayhem is here. Wish me luck!” she said before hanging up the phone.

Wayhem came barging into her bedroom, balancing boxes precariously. 

“Hi, Brin! Are you excited, I’m so excited!” he fired rapidly, “Adrien called. Adrien called! And he offered to lend me some Ladybug merch for the stream! So I just ran to his place and came here as soon as I could!”

“Fantastic!” Sabrina clapped with excitement, “Chloe sent her merch and some costumes too! Let’s prepare the set, we haven’t got a lot of time!”

It took them the best part of the next hour to decide on the camera angle and set the lights accordingly. They debated over whether to include her en-suite bathroom in the frame or not, but they decided against it. Then, they artfully arranged the merch in Sabrina’s room, prepped the costumes and hang them in her shower, and put the craft materials on the desk, next to the computer.

“Well, it’s now or never,” Sabrina said nervously at last.

“You’re going to be great!” Wayhem said as he hugged her.

They did a breathing exercise--they were not procrastinating, swear to god--and then they launched the live stream.

“Wow!” Wayhem said, “there are a lot of early birds here!”

“Hello, princessbubbline,” Sabrina greeted, “hello, theofficialdarkowl. Hi there, croissantnoir!”

“Hello, patrons and friends of EHA, we’re very excited to be here with you today!” Wayhem said.

“I’m Sabrina, and this is my friend Wayhem,” she introduced. “He generously offered to co-host this livestream with me.”

“IT’S MY PLEASURE!” he squealed.

“You know that our posting schedule was disrupted this week, so we are streaming today instead of the video I had planned for my Hero Cosplay series. I hope you can understand. I’m sure we’ll have lots of fun!”

“Hello, stingerofabee!” Wayhem greeted, “Hello, ladynoir4ever! Let me tell you, I met Brin some months ago at a convention, and I became starstruck with her cosplay, and then with her amazing self. We’ve become fast friends. And I insist I’m so thrilled to be here!” he said, doing a little dance.

“You’re so sweet, Wayhem!” Sabrina beamed, “Thanks again for agreeing to this on such short notice!”

“So, tell us, Brin, what did you prepare for us today?” he asked.

“Well, I’m working on a Queen Bee costume, so I thought I can do that while we chat. And, I have a Chat Noir, and a Ladybug costume. So I can try them and show them to you!”

“Oh, yes! I’ve seen your Chat Noir before, and it’s great,” Wayhem said, “Never seen you cosplaying LB, though. Is it new?”

“Well, a friend just gave it to me as a gift. I’ll be trying it for the first time, so maybe our friends at the live stream can give us their opinion. To see what adjustments need to be made!”

“ Sounds like lots of fun! Shall we get started?”

“Let’s do it!” Sabrina agreed. “I want to paint some accessories for Queen Bee, so let’s have a look at that first!”

“What are you working on?” Wayhem wanted to know.

She lifted a piece and showed it to the camera. “I’ve got this spinning top, and the white coat is dry,so I’m painting it yellow and black.”

“Nice! It always makes me chuckle when I think about the heroes’ weapons,” Wayhem said. ”They are supercool, but, obviously, they are magical, because, how else could you kick ass with a yoyo? I mean, they regularly face the scariest dudes, with nothing but a toy, or a stick.”

“And here, I have a hair comb,” Sabrina continued, “it’s super simple, but I got this broken bee brooch, and I need to glue them together, somehow.”

“Superglue to the rescue!” Wayhem said. “Hey, it’s really pretty,” he said, grabbing the bee piece. He showed it to the camera, “it has rhinestones on it, and it’s very shiny, can you see?”

Sabrina pointed with a brush, spinning top on the other hand, “it’s fantasy jewellery, of course, my aunt was very sad when it broke. She was going to throw it away but...‘ she said as she continued painting, “you know what they say.”

“One man’s trash is another man’s treasure!” Wayhem completed. “I use this superglue brand, and it’s worked great this metal on metal,” Wayhem read. “Thanks, craftyant! Is that the brand you use, Brin?”

“Ah, yes! It is! Thanks, guys, I’m relieved if you say it worked for you!”

“Say, Brin,” Wayhem asked, “Do you think the LB costume would fit me?” and he wiggled his eyebrows.

“I’d say you’re too tall, and your shoulders are too broad,” she said, giving it some consideration, “but I think it would be wasting potential.”

“You break my heart! What do you mean? Don’t you think I could be a good Bug?”

“I’m sure you’ll be great,” she said, lifting the spinning top to examine the black line she had just painted, “but, hear me out... Carapace.”

“Ho ho ho!” he said, clapping his hands, “I’m digging it! What do you think, guys, would I make a good Carapace?”

“I think this is done,” Sabrina said, putting her work away. “Shall I go get changed?”

“Yeah, great,” he said, "I’ll keep on chatting with our friends here in the meantime!”

She stood up and waved at the camera. “I’ll be back in a sec, please don’t tell you-know-who about my secret identity, OK?” she winked, and exited the frame.

“No offense, but I think that out of the EHA, Luka is the Carapace,” Wayhem read. “Do you think so? And you agree guys?” as hearts flooded the screen, he had to admit defeat, “he’s so protective, and cool!” he read, “OK, if your hearts are set on that, what about my original idea? Don’t you think I could do a good cosplay of LB or CN? I totally see myself clad in black, brandishing the stick!” he said, and he stood up and stroke a flashy pose.

**Princessbubbline** : Sorry! Those two are saved 4 Julerose!

**Asleepypotato** : Whats julerose?

 **Princessbubbline** : oooooooooo just my new otp, julekaxrose

 **Anonymous** : the eha kitty sections girls? I thought they looked cute together too!

 **Imhere4theuwus** : the colour scheme! They can totally rock LB and CN. Juleka in pigtails!

 **Johnjeanjuan** : ooooh cat!Rose, give me back my heart!

 **Tirednwired** : hear me out, what about the time a girl was CN and a boy was the bug? Remember the SWAP

 **Anomymous** : the SWAAAAAPPPPPP

 **Kittysectionfanclub** : wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii catgirl!Jules and bugboy!Rose 

Wayhem laughed, “Are you listening to this, Brin? They are so invested, they won’t let me cosplay CN or LB!”

“I hope they are fine with me doing it, then!” Sabrina laughed from the bathroom.

**Imhere4theuwus** : julerose have the colour scheme and the hairstyles, they have my heart

 **Anonymous** : mylene as pegasus. dreadlocks, yesss

 **Rockboy** : but we give Brin a chance, come on over!

 **Jaggedandstoned** : Luka as Carapace, Julerose as LB and Chat Noir... can Ivan be rena ROuge? CaN mY heart take so much?

 **Rollingthepenny** : *starts a petition for Kitty Section to play doing cosplay*

 **Princessbubbline** : DSFHBJBHGVVFXDEYR

Sabrina walked into the frame, “Me-ouch, won’t you give a kitty a crumb of a chance?” she said, putting her ‘paws’ to her face.

“Wow, Brin, you look awesome.”

“I’m pawsitive,” she said, “But I dunno who that Brin is, I’m the one and only Chat Noir!” and she flexed her arms.

Wayham started laughing very hard, “You’re killing me!”

“No need to cry,” she added, spinning her baton, “you knight in shining leather is here to protect you tonight!”

“Will you do a catwalk run, to show your stuff to our friends?” Wayhem asked.

“I cannot say no when you phrase it like that, citizen,” she smirked and started prancing up and down her room, stopping ro pose from time to time.

**Parisiennecat** : ooooh she’s good!

 **Ladybird** : the puns, it’s too much! Call the cops!

 **Leglacier** : I dunno, I’m too invested in julerose cosplay now, sorry, little Brin!

“Our patrons need a little nudging,” Wayhem said, “can you try the LB costume now, to see if that helps them make up their minds, and appreciate quality cosplay?”

“OK, I’ll go change,” she said, “but I’m the cat’s meow and you know it!”

“Well,” Wayhem addressed the camera, “I wouldn’t put my hands on the fire for Ivan!rena, can we brainstorm some other possibilities? If you are so hooked on the EHA group cosplay of the heroes of Paris, I’m sure you’ve got some ideas.”

He grabbed his chin and hummed as if deep in thought, and twirled in his chair. "Kagami!"he said happily. ”Kagami doesn’t give me Rena Rouge vibes,” he read, “You think so? She looks good in red!”

**Stingerofabee** : C’mon, short dark hair, right? Calm and collected... Kagami screams Viperion!

 **Turtleslowdown** : AWRTFADSWR Kagami!snake nation rise!

 **Onefreckledfox** : but Ivan, he can be roi singe, he was a big guy, right?

 **Theinnocentfly** : nononono Marinette is Roi Singe: everyone talks about her, and no-one has seen her. 

**Anonymous** : ok, but rena... what about nino, isnt he the reliable brunette?

“Hey, I’m a reliable brunette too!” Wayhem mock-whined, “You are not leaving anything for me!”

“Miracles are real in Paris,” Sabrina said bursting in, she rolled over her bed and jumped up, “don’t lose heart, citizen, the one and only Ladybug is here!”

“It’s too late,” Wayhem said, clutching his chest, “don’t tell me not to lose heart, when you’re the one who steals it!” At that they both started laughing.

**Ladynoir4ever** : this is my new otp, wayhem x bug!brin

 **Princesbubbline** : alright, they can exist alongside cat!jules and bug!rose

 **Anonymous** : into the miraculousverse!

“What do you think?” Marinette asked, “how can we complete the hero team?”

“Oh!” Luka said, “Adrien can be Ryuko, he’d be killer with the sword.”

“I like that,” his girlfriend replied. “Maybe Alya can be Queen Bee, she’s got the sass.”

Luka laughed, “You’re getting mixed up, that’s Viperion.”

“What do you mean?” Marinette said nervously, “Viperion is so collected, he doesn’t seem the sassy type, right.”

Luka simply smiled. “You as Roi Singe, ah?”

“What,” she said, “Don’t I strike you like the big athletic dude type?”

“You certainly are the hero type,” he said approaching. “And you certainly are my type,” he whispered, kissing her forehead. “I love you,” he added.

“I love you too,” she mumbled, face pressed onto his shirt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I totally ship Waybrina now. And I have an uncontrollable urge to draw juleka as Lady Noir and Rose as Misterbug. But Chloe/theraphy is my OTP
> 
> But what was that last minute lukanette tucked in?


	8. The one that was utterly ridiculous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloé, Luka and Kagami hang out. Alix and Kim get shipped by audiences who don't know any better.

MHA meetings had become scarcer since the launch of EHA--which included them all, and kept them in touch and busy anyway--but the timid text of Chloé’s in the group chat set them in motion. It was not mean that they created a subgroup chat without her, Alya reasoned, because she was volatile and in need of support, there was stuff that required handling behind her back. It was quickly decided that Luka and Kagami were the best candidates to take her offer and watch the latest EHA videos together at Le Grand Paris, as they hadn’t had any involvement in the events that the testimony would delve into. Everyone sent stickers, gifs and replies to the big group chat, and it was settled.

With the unwavering aid of Butler Jean--and lots of other staff--Chloé arranged the comfiest couch, with cushions and blankets, a big TV set connected to her PC, currently playing soft music, and ordered a variety of snacks and sweets.

“Maybe some pizza?” the socialité threw in Jean’s direction as she paced the room, “Sushi! Kagami must like sushi!”

“Do you know if any of your friends have special dietary needs? Are vegetarian, maybe?” the butler offered helpfully.

“I don’t know! I’ll ask in the group! There’s a group, and I’m it!” Chloé beamed. “Look at this sticker, Jean! I’m adding it to favourites!”

As the sun was coming down, Luka came cycling, and Kagami was driven to the hotel. Luka watched her extricate herself from her mother with many a courtesy and promises to give her updates and that yes, she was sure that striking a relationship with Chloé Bourgeoise, daughter of the Mayor, would be beneficial. She sighed as the car drove away, and as they made eye contact, she waved at him.

“Shall we get in?” he asked, a soft smile on his lips.

“Sure,” she said, and they approached the lobby boy.

“You’re looking very nice,” he complimented her as they were riding the lift, “It’s nice to see you out of Catholic school uniform.”

“Thanks,” she replied, looking down at her pink overalls. She picked the frills of her blouse and added, “I own a lot of outfits like this, but I’d rather my mom sees me in school uniform. If she thinks I’m being responsible and I’m onto official business somewhere, there’s a greater chance that she’ll let me be. Not much, but still,” she shrugged.

With the chiming of a bell, the lift door opened to a fidgeting Chloe being reassured by her butler.

“I’m sure the number of cushions is perfectly adequate, mademoiselle,” he was just telling her, warning Chloe with a stare that her guests were there already.

“Oh, there you are! I’d forgotten you were coming,” she said.

“Miss! At what time exactly do you want us to serve the veggie pizza rolls?” the chef asked, bursting from a side door.

“Not now!” she snapped at him, flushing beetroot red and gesturing him away.

“I mean, of course I knew you were coming,” she told Luka and Kagami, “but I lost track of time!”

“It’s OK,” Luka said diplomatically. Kagami simply did her best at subtlety when hiding a giggle behind her hand.

“Oh, I know!” Chloé said, “You’ve been here before, Kagami, but, would you two like a tour around? Before we have a snack and watch the videos?”

“That would be lovely,” Kagami accepted graciously, “I’ve never been given a tour proper of Le Grand Paris.”

“Sounds great!” Luka seconded.

Later in the evening, as they were lounging on the comfiest sofa and enjoying potato chips and fried cheese sticks with ginger lemonade, Chloé had eased into her idea of having multiple friends over. As the last track of the album playing came to an end, Luka suggested they should watch the videos.

“Maybe we can watch the testimony first, and then the other?” he said.

“Good call,” Kagami agreed, “mother will start bothering anytime now. Sorry. Also, I usually watch the videos in that order. You know, in case the testimony upsets me. The other one usually cheers me up.”

“Yeah, me too,” Chloé said quietly. She stood up and opened the video in the browser. She pressed play, and hurried back to the couch, sitting between Luka and Kagami and grabbing a cushion.

Kim, Alix, Max and Lila were sitting by the swimming pool. The soft splash of waves and the shimmering on the water surface gave a soothing ambiance.

_“I’m Lê Chiến Kim,” the big boy said to the camera. “I’m 15, and I’m a student at Francoise Dupont. These are Alix, Max, and Lila. Thanks for coming, guys.”_

_“You’re welcome, Kim,” Lila said, her voice dripping molasses, “You know I’m always here to support a friend! As we all are,” she added, looking at the other two, “right?”_

_“Yeah, of course,” Alix said, as Max and Kim fist-bumped._

_“So Kim, why are we here today?” Lila asked._

_“The swimming pool is one of my favourite places in the world, I love exercising, and swimming, I hope I go pro one day. And... me gf and I got together here, so, it’s special to me.”_

_“It’s a nice place!” Lila said. “But, don’t you want to tell us something, Kim? ”_

_Alix just covered her face, her shoulders shaking, Max looked straight into the camera, stoic face._

_“Oh! Yeah!” Kim facepalmed, “Today, I’ll tell you about the time I was akumatized.”_

“Are Kim and Alix dating?,” Kagami wanted to know.

“Why do you say so?” Luka asked.

“Look how she’s blushing and covering her face when he mentioned his girlfriend,” Kagami observed, “And she’s a sportsperson too.”

“I’m positive it’s just second-hand embarrassment,” Chloé scoffed.

_“It went like this,” Kim was saying, “before getting together with my girl, I used to fancy another one. And I planned to confess to her on Valentine’s day.”_

_“We made a number of precise plans and calculations,” Max said, “I was sure it was going to turn out the best way possible.”_

_“Thanks, bud,” Kim told him, “I’m sorry I wasted your time so bad.”_

_“There are just so many variables that you cannot plan for,” Lila commented with an air of secret martyr. “The best laid plans often go awry,” she added, making eyes at Kim._

_“Though really, you used to have a... ahm... questionable taste in girls,” Alix poked._

_“So, with the help of my friend Max here, I searched and searched, and I bought her a present I thought she’d love, and rehearsed my speech, and scratched my head to come up with the most romantic place, and all. When school finished, I raced to Pont des Arts to intercept her there.”_

_“Oh!” Lila sighed, holding her hands to her chest, “that sounds live the loveliest, most earnest love confession!”_

_“Yeah,” said Kim, “only, I got nervous, and my words wouldn’t come up, and I kneeled on a puddle, and got splashed in puddle water, and some random trash came flying and hit me in the face.”_

_“I’m sure that a good girl could've looked past that,” Lila said._

_“She said she wasn’t into me anyway,” Kim shrugged._

_“Bad for her,” Lila assured him._

_“That was not the worst thing she did,” Alix pointed out, “not by far.”_

_“Let it go, Alix,” Kim told her._

_“Objectively, not as your best friend,” Max chirped in, “I can assure you all she did was 120% unnecessarly mean to you.”_

_“Will you tell me, and your patrons, what happened, Kim?” Lila asked._

_“Well, she took a photo of me, in the puddle and the trash and all, and send it to everyone. And laughed.”_

_“Oh, my!” Lila cried out, “I’m with Alix and Max here, that was awful! So, you got akumatized after that?”_

_“I did,” Kim replied. “Sure thing I did. I saw the footage, and my akuma was like an anti-Cupid, that made people hate the ones they love. I had wings and a bow, and all. Sick. But, not cool." He shrugged, "Later, my sweet girl also got akumatized trying to confess to me. Love is hard.”_

_“You can’t compare the two situations Kim,” Alix interjected, “you were oblivious, but never hurtful or mean.”_

_“I agree with Alix,” Max said._

_“Well, I agree with Kim,” Lila said, smiling at him. “What lesson do you think we can learn from your experience?”_

_“As I said, love is hard. Strong emotions, maybe you are scared or excited to confess, if you don’t you get sad and frustrated, if you get rejected it hurts. If it turns out well... well, it’s the best feeling. And strong feelings attract the Mothman like a flame. You should always pay attention to your feelings and have empathy and compassion towards other guys. No matter what side of the confession you are, but especially if someone confesses to you, you gotta be gentle. And if you confess to someone, you gotta be understanding, and accepting. Give them space and make sure you don’t make them uncomfortable.”_

_“Say no to harassment,” Alix added._

_“Amen,” seconded Max._

_“And don’t be a sap,” Alix said._

_“Hey, I’m a sap,” Kim said, standing up. “And you can do nothing about it.”_

_“I can’t, can I” she replied, standing up too._

_“No you can’t,” he said._

_“Oh, you think so,” she said, pushing him a little._

_“I do,” he said confidently._

_“I disagree,” she said, pushing him into the pool. He grabbed her and they both disappeared under the water. Max couldn’t stop laughing, so he just walked away from the frame._

_Drying her face on a towel, Lila said, “Well, I’m happy that your dating life has turned for the better, Kim.” And, as his face broke the surface of the water, “Thanks for sharing your story, and your dating advice.”_

_“Stay strong!” Alix said._

_“And stay safe!” Max added, jumping into the frame again. They all waved at the camera and the picture faded._

“Ridiculous, utterly ridiculous!” Chloé exclaimed, hugging her cushion, legs tucked under the blanket. Luka just patted her shoulder, as Kagami stood up to play the next video.

Kim and Alix’s faces appeared on camera again, but this time, they were at a park, she was wearing her rollerblades and yet she barely reached his arm pit. 

_“Hello, I’m Alix,” the petite girl introduced herself._

_“And I’m Kim,” he said, waving. “And I’m the hottest shot around town.”_

_“No, you ain’t. I bet I can do whatever you do, and do it better,” she said._

_“Well, I bet you can’t,” he replied, making a face at her._

_“Welcome to our series of challenges, in which I will prove to Kim, time and time again who’s the boss,” the small girl told the camera._

_“Ready for challenge one?” the big boy asked, offering his hand._

_“Bring it on!” she said, shaking it._

_“I bet you can’t dish out compliments to random strangers as successfully as me. Fifteen minutes.”_

_She cackled, spinning fast on her blades. “I’m the queen of observation and niceties. You are doomed! I’ll make you bite the dust with how NICE I AM!”_

_“Our safety team is here with us today,” Kim said as the camera panned to show Mylene, Rose and Adrien and dark suits, and sunglasses. Text appeared on screen ‘All-round nice people, for real’ pointing at the girls, and ‘etiquette expert’, pointing at Adrien._

_The shot changed to one a la Big Brother Diary room, “I’m an all-round nice person too,” Adrien said. And then back to the park._

_“They’ll be judging how successful our random compliments are,” Kim said._

_“And preventing us from doing anything stupid,” Kim added._

_The frame split in two, each side showing a camera, following Kim and Alix respectively. There was a counter on top of each, and a timer with a 15 minutes countdown at the bottom. The worlds ‘ready, set, GO!’ flashed on the screen._

_“I was sure I had the upper-hand,” Alix said in the diary room, “people are more willing to receive compliments from a girl.”_

_Back in the park, Kim pointed to a senior lady with a dog, and approached her slowly. He crouched next to the puppy and offered his hand for it to sniff. The puppy licked it._

_“Who’s a good boy! You are!” he told the pup. “Hi! What’s his name?” he asked the lady._

_“He’s called Pierre,” the lady smiled._

_“He’s such a handsome boy,” Kim said, scratching the dog’s head. “And his coat is so shiny and soft. I’m sure you take good care of him!” he told the lady._

_“I try to! He only eats fresh food,” the lady confided, “The vet recommended it because he’s got a delicate stomach.”_

_“He certainly looks happy, you do good by him!” Kim insisted._

_“Thank you, young man,” the lady beamed. “You’re very kind!” Kim made a small fistpump in the air, said goodbye, and started scanning for his next victim._

_The safety team debated._

_“That was very suave,” Adrien said._

_“He complimented the dog, and then gave a second hand compliment to the lady,” Mylene observed. “That’s a pro move.”_

_“And he made himself very non-threatening to both the pup, and the lady. Good command of dog body language,” Rose nodded._

_The counter went 2-0 in favour of Kim._

_“Damn, he’s good!” Alix said in the Dairy Room, “but I’m not giving up easily!”_

_“Excuse me,” she said, approaching an older boy, “can you tell me the way to the metro station?”_

_“Eh, sure,” he said. He took out his phone and checked in the maps app, “Line 3?”_

_“Yes,” she nodded, “I moved recently, and I’m not so good at finding my way around yet. And I find the map a bit confusing,” she added, showing her own phone._

_“It was a lie,” she told them in Diary room._

_“No problem,” the boy said, “you need to walk three blocks in that direction, and then turn left, walk some more, and it should be there!”_

_“Oh, I see!” she beamed, “that’s so much clearer! You’re so kind, thanks a bunch!”_

_“You’re welcome,” he smiled back, scratching his neck._

_“Ask for help with something small, so people will feel good about you and about themselves?” Rose said, “she’s got it down to the a t.”_

_The counter went 2-1._

_“She’s nowhere near my level,” Kim boasted confidently in the Diary room, with the shimmer of an anime villain in his eye._

_The video continued like that for the best part of the next 10 minutes, with interactions and compliments getting more and more convoluted. The final score turned out to be a tie, so the rivals promised to clash again next time to settle once and for all who’s the boss._

_“Would you like to join the compliment challenge?” Kim asked the audience._

_“Record yourself giving sincere compliments to people around you, and record their reaction. You can send it to us, or upload it in social media under the hashtag #complimentchallenge,” Alix said._

_“Remember to be always respectful,” Mylene went on, “and not get into other people's personal space.”_

_“See you next time,” they all sing-sang together, and the video faded out._

“You are a great hostess,” Kagami told Chloe.

“Ah? What?” Chloae mumbled, turning to find Kagami recording. “Of course I am,” Chloe replied at last, “Thanks, though,” she added, looking down and blushing.

“ The pizza veggie rolls were awesome!” Luka added. "#complimentchallenge, yes!” he shot at Kagami, “@ me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lila was given lines. I thought she's relished being the host, and someone else needs to be "the one who wasn't there"from time to time. It can't be Luka or Kagami always.


	9. The one with baking and battleship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The baking vid needs shooting, and some ships need sinking! But others may sail...

Later that week, akumas seemed to be lying low, plans went back on track and some schedules suddenly cleared. Alya had a handful though, managing threads and comments, their number of patrons growing alarmingly fast. Of course it was a good thing, but the TRAFFIC. The need for getting content out there at a reliable pace, added to an unusually calm time for some EHA members prompted an early shooting of Marinette’s section. Adrien’s free schedule for Wednesday evening was a specially rare occurrence, so the opportunity was not to be missed.

“If Sunshine’s in it,” Alya was telling Alix, “it will surely hit off.”

“If anything,” Alix replied, “his fans are _devoted_.”

“You and Kim are getting a lot of attention too,” Alya remarked, “though not all of it is... erhm... super appropriate.”

“Never Sunshine levels though,” the small girl shrugged.

“You sure it doesn’t bother you?” the Ladyblogger pressed.

“It’s kinda annoying,” Alix conceded, “but mostly just waaaay off the mark.” She bit her lip, and added, “You think we should do something about it?”

“Mmm...” Alya hummed pensively, “Are you and Kim free this afternoon? Mari could use a hand.”

“Oh! I know that tone!” Alix said excitedly, “tell me your plan!”

As Adrien entered Tom and Sabine’s patisserie later that day, he could hear the clatter. When he finished climbing the stairs into the family's residence, he found Marinette zooming around the kitchen, getting ingredients, shifting lights and camera angles, and arranging the background with the aid of Kim, Alix and Ondine.

“Never fret!” he announced, “your quality tester and batter-cleaner is here! How can I help?”

“Hello, Adrien!” Marinette greeted, “You’re just in time!”

“We were just a bit early,” Kim said, offering his fist to bump, “What’s up?”

“I didn’t know there were openings for quality testers!” Ondine exclaimed, “I was just recruited for camera duty.”

“And stuff,” Alix added.

“And stuff,” Ondine giggled nervously.

“I’m Ondine, by the way,” she told Adrien, shaking his hand. “Nice to meet you!”

“Nice to meet you too!” he replied politely. “Don’t worry, I’m sure there are more openings for quality testers, right, Marinette?” he said, pecking her cheek.

“Yeah, as long as you’re not overly greedy, we’ll manage,” she said, turning around and shuffling the decor for the Nth time.

“Model’s word,” Adrien promised putting his hand to his heart, “I don’t eat much.”

“Dude,” Kim told him, “you worry me sometimes.”

“Only sometimes?” Alix joked. “Nice to see you, dude,” she said, waving her hand at him, before swatting Marinette’s hand. “Let it be,” she warned her friend. “It won’t look any better.”

Soon enough, everything was deemed appropriately attractive and they were ready to start. Adrien and Marinette put on aprons and toques, and sat on the stools in front of the counter. The camera started rolling.

“Hi! I’m Marinette Dupain-Cheng,” she said, “and this,” she added, pointing at the boy, “is my friend Adrien. I’m sure you know him already!”

“Hi!” Adrien waved, “maybe our patrons know you too, Mari! You’ve won design contests, and your derby hat made it into the Gabriel catwalk!” He addressed the camera, “she also designed Jagged Stone’s latest album’s cover. I got an autographed copy!”

“Oh, Adrien,” she said, covering her face with her hands, and blushing, “stop it!“

“And,” he pressed on, “you probably heard about her a lot in EHA’s Patreon, because Marinette is our class representative, and everyday Ladybug!”

“That’s a high compliment,” she said from between her fingers, “but thanks!”

“#complimentchallenge!” he finger gunned.

“Oh, you're a dork,” she said, punching his shoulder.

“And you don’t love me any less for it,” he said, blushing too. “So,” he topic swerved, “what are you treating us to today?‘ 

“Well,” she tried to recover, “my parents are bakers, and I live in a patisserie. Baking is like a second nature to me. And it’s a comforting activity, and"she said, "what self-respecting Frenchman doesn’t like baked goods? So, I want to share some tips and recipes with our patrons.”

“As a self-respecting Frenchman, I find it totally awesome,” he said. “What is it like, living in a patisserie?” he added, a longing shimmer in his eye.

“Well,” she said, as if considering the question, “I’ve resigned myself to always reeking of orange blossom water or vanilla extract, best case scenario. And there’s always flour on me, and all around.” 

He hummed appreciative of her struggles. She continued, “You’d be shocked if I told you where I’ve found the stuff. So, not a good place if you are gluten intolerant.”

“I see,” he nodded. 

“Which of course, I am not!” she added. “Are you gluten intolerant, Adrien?”

“No, I’m not!” he answered.

She sighed in mock relief. “What about you guys?” she shot at the crew.

“We’re good,” Alix said, looking to the other two.

“Now we know it is safe, tell me, what shall I be assisting you with today?” Adrien asked.

“Oh, yes, thanks for that! Today,” she told the camera, “Adrien’ll be my assistant...”

“And quality tester!” he chirped in.

“Of course, and batter cleaner, if you want to...” she yielded.

“Yes!” he said, looking like the paragon of triumph, shaking his own hand.

“So, with his aid, I’ll be teaching you, guys,” she continued, “to make chocolate chip cookies. This is a super simple but delicious recipe you all can do at home.”

“I love chocolate chip cookies!” Adriend cried out.

“Me too!” Kim added, the girls also joining with murmurs of ascent.

“I’m making another batch later this week that will be auctioned among our patrons, so make sure you participate!”

“A batch of chocolate chip cookies baked by the one and only Marinette Dupain-Cheng?” Adriend interjected, “you sure don’t wanna miss that, my friends!”

She smiled at him. And then continued, “So, what do we need? The ingredients are,” she started listing, and pointing to her side, as Alya had suggested, “100g of butter, room temperature; 150g of granulated sugar; 170g of flour; a spoonful of baking powder; one egg; a spoonful of vanilla extract; and 100g of chocolate chips.” She sighed, “I feel stupid,” she pointed again, “doing this.”

“It’ll look good in post-ed,” Adrien reassured her. “It’s a Tik-Tok trend.”

She steeled her nerves and went on, looking straight at the camera. “You’ll also need a bowl, a spoon and a baking pan. Are you ready?” She asked Adrien.

“You lead the way, chef Marinette!” he replied, beaming. They walked some steps to the right, and the camera followed them. The necessary elements were arranged in front of them.

“First of all, you need to preheat the oven at a low temperature,” she told Adrien.

“Like this?” he asked, checking the oven behind them, “with the dial pointing to the little flame?”

“Yes, exactly. Do you want to do the honours?” she offered.

“Oh, sure! Do you think it’s gonna be OK? I’m never done this before,” he said. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll walk you through the steps,” she said, patting his shoulder.

He braced himself in front of the metal bowl, pressed his hands together in front of himself, as if praying, and sighed. “OK, I’m ready.”

She giggled. “OK, put the butter and the sugar in the bowl. Good, and mix them,” she instructed,

“With my hands?!” he asked, bewildered.

“Yes, if you want to,” she shrugged, “or you can use the spoon.”

“I want to use my hands!” he said full of excitement.

‘Have you washed them?“ she inquired. He shook his head. “Then go wash them,” she said pointing at the kitchen sink. “Always wash your hands,” she told the camera.

“OK,” he said, coming back. “So I just...?” 

“Yeah, that’s good,” she said, putting her hands inside the bowl alongside his. “You mix it like that till it’s homogeneous.” She blushed, and grabbed a cloth to rinse her hands.

“Is this OK?” he said, showing the contents of the bowl to her.

“That’s perfect, show the camera,” she approved. “Now, we add the egg and continue mixing.”

He looked at her expectantly.

“Shall I break the egg?” she asked.

“Please? I’m afraid I’ll make a mess.”

“I can’t say no to those puppy eyes. But, I’ll give you, and our friends some tips.” She grabbed a glass of water and a small bowl. “Always check if the eggs are good. If you put them in water,” she said, dropping hers in the glass, “and it sinks, it’s good.” She showed to the camera how hers was sitting at the bottom. “If it floats it means it’s bad, and you don’t want rotten eggs in your food.”

“Have you ever broken a rotten egg?” Adrien asked.

“Actually, yes! I had a terrible experience. It was summer, very hot,” she said, “and we bought a carton that was bad. I broke twelve rotten eggs, one after the other.”

“Oh! How awful!” he cried in outrage and sympathy.

“You can’t imagine. So, the lesson is, stay safe, check your eggs.”

They both giggled. “Another tip: be decisive. You tap you egg against a hard surface, like the counter, or the side of the bowl,‘ she demonstrated. “And use your thumbs to separate the egg shell where it's cracked and tip the egg into a bowl,” she said, pouring it into the cup. “ Always do that in a separate container, just in case.”

“There you go, now, mix,” she told Adrien, pouring the egg into the bowl.

“Yes, madam,” he said diligently.

“We add the vanilla extract,” she said, doing as instructed. “You keep mixing,” she indicated Adrien.

“Yes, madam,” he nodded.

“And now, we add the flour, and the baking powder,” she told the camera, as she added the ingredients to the mix.

“And I mix,“ Adrien said.

“I see you’re learning fast!” she approved. “Now we add the chocolate chips...” she shot a look at him, “No puppy eyes at me, you can’t eat them yet.”

Adrien sighed, deflated, “I had to try.”

She looked into the bowl, “That’s good, you can go wash your hands.” She showed the bowl to the camera as he scurried to the side yet again. “It should look like this. This is the right consistency, but if yours is a lot less solid,” she said, pinching the dough and showing the consistency to the camera, “you should put it in the fridge for some minutes.”

“I’m back!” Adrien announced. ‘Did you miss your faithful assistant?“ he asked Marinette, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Sorely,” she rolled her eyes.

“What do we do now?” he wanted to know.

“Now,” she replied, “grab the spoon, and put spoonfuls of dough in the pan. We should butter and flour it fist, though,” she looked at him. “I’ll do it,"she decided, "you’ve washed your hands already.... And... there you go.”

He scooped some dough. “Is this OK?” he consulted.

“Perfect,” she approved, “place them 5cm appart.” She supervised his work. “That’s great, now, let’s put it in the oven,” she instructed, looking at him.

“Should I wear mittens?” he said, looking around for the safety items.

“Not now,” she answered, “but definitely when we take the pan out of the oven.”

He picked up the pan carefully, and took it to the oven as if in slow motion.

“I’ll set the timer,” she told the camera, picking a plastic apple, “in 10 minutes. That should be enough. But check on your cookies, because you should take them out of the oven when the sides turn golden.”

Adrien finally closed the oven behind her, and gave her a thumbs up, “Ready!”

“In the meantime, I’ll leave you with some friends,” she said, pushing Adrien out of the frame. “You can eat the batter in the bowl,” she told him. 

Alix, Kim and Ondine stepped in front of the kitchen counter.

“Hello,” the petite girl said, “I’m Alix and I'm aromantic.” 

“Hello,” the taller ginger said, “I'm Ondine and I'm moronsexual.” 

“I’m Kim,” the boy introduced himself, “and I'm Ondine’s moron.” 

Alix continued, “In the light of the response to our recent videos, we want to tell you we appreciate your enthusiasm about our content, we do.” She paused briefly before adding, “but we do not appreciate the shipping,” and pointed to herself and Kim.

Kim said, “Hate to sink a ship, but Kimalix is not happening, dudes.” 

“And Kimdine is canon,” Alix added, pointing to the pair.

Kim asked Ondine, “Does anyone call us that?” She shrugged.

“In all seriousness,” Ondine said, holding her boyfriend’s face in her hands and looking at him straight in the eye, “You are not a moron, Kim, and if you were, that’s not why I like you. I like you because you’re sincere, and earnest, and lots of fun to hang out with!”

“Thanks, Ondine!” he replied, “I like you, not because you are the only one who would have a moron like me. You are so creative, and kind, and your breast stroke is *chef's kiss*!”

“You don’t actually say *chef’s kiss*, Kim” Alix reprimanded. “But, you see!” she said looking at the camera, “That's what a true OTP looks like! Not whatever we have!” And she pointed to Kim and herself again, a sour grimace on her face.

“We are more like frenemies,” Kim said.

“The belligerent tension!” Alix mocked, quoting the comments people had posted.

“And those are nice tropes in fiction,” Ondine told the camera, “but we are real people.” 

“Underage real people,” Kim added, crossing his arms.

“It’s not very cool of you to ship real people,” Alix said, “people who are under the age of consent. Vocally. On the internet. It’s a bit weird.”

“Your participation in the EHA project is very welcome but, please reconsider this attitude,” Ondine scolded. “It can be harmful and that’s something EHA cannot let fly past the radar.” 

“And this is important too,” Kim added, “you guys are also real people. If your partner or friend is always poking fun at you or calling you names, or makes you feel that you need to prove yourself all the time, ditch them!”

“So choose someone who looks at you like Kim looks at Ondine,” Marinette said, entering the frame. Kim made heart eyes at Ondine.

“Sap!” Alix said, gesturing as if she’d throw up.

“And not someone who looks at you the way Kim looks at Alix,” Mari continued, as Kim glared at Alix. 

“But, in all seriousness,” Adrien said as he jumped into the frame too, “Alix and Kim are good friends, and they know that they are joking.”

“That’s right,” Marinette agreed, “So let’s do the _say something nice_ exercise, to show one another how we really feel!” 

“I’ll start,” Alix offered. “Ondine,” she told the other girl, “you are everything I’d like to be, tall and kind. I don’t think I’m growing any taller, but maybe with friends like you I can become kinder.”

“ Alix!” Ondine sniffled. “YOU are everything that I’d like to be! You’re so driven, and you have no problem expressing what you want. You are a true role model!!!” 

And the two girls hugged. Adrien started clapping and Mari and Kim followed suit.

“And Kim,” Alix said, extricating herself from the girlfriend and facing the boyfriend. “You are fun to be with,” she told him, “and I like how we challenge each other all the time, because it helps us both grow.”

“I know I make fun of how tiny you are,” he told her.

“I’m not that small!” she complained.

“You’re TINY,” he stressed. “But you’re so talented and energetic,” he continued, “ that if you were any bigger I’d had no chance of beating you at anything. I’m happy we are friends.”

At that moment, a bell rang and Marinette hurried round the counter.

“Cookies are ready!” she announced, taking the pan out of the oven. “I’m wearing mittens!” she announced too, glancing at Adriend, who looked relieved.

“And everyone here,“ she said as she lifted the cookies and placed them on a plate,”is a kind and honest friend. So,” she told the others, as she came around the counter, “you all get a cookie!”

"Friendship cookie!" Kim celebrated. "Yeah!" he high-fived Alix.

Marinette offered the plate to her friends, “Careful, they are hot!”

Adrien moaned, “Hih ah so gooh!”

“Watch out for the molten chocolate, you dorky dragon!” she told him, booping his nose. The others munched a bit more gingerly.

“Thanks for watching,” Marinette told the camera. “If you bake these, please send us a photo! And remember to participate in the auction, and vote for what we are baking next! Stay strong and stay safe!” They all waved.

“I’ll go press stop,” she told her friends some seconds later, and gave the plate to Ondine. “Save a cookie for me,” she told her, “I don’t trust the others!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My cousin brought some amazing chocolate chip cookies to my place some days ago, and he was kind enough to lend me the recipe. I did that, I broke 12 rotten eggs one after the other, and got very traumatised as a result.  
> So, how did you like your adrienette fluff?  
> I cackled way too much writing the Sexual Orientation Disclaimer (ft Ondine)


	10. The one in  which Kagami realises something important

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So much relationship advice had to impact her somehow. What happens when a sheltered, clever girl, realises her experience doesn't add up to her knowledge? Fortunately, she has more wordly friends to turn to.  
> You may want to listen to Girls and Boys, by Blur.

It had been at the back of her brain during her orange juice dates with Marinette. It had become more prominent any time she found herself re-reading the MHA and EHA group chats, never mind new messages, just clicking on everyone ‘s profile pictures and reading their descriptions fondly. Her second video date with Luka and Chloe had made it impossible to ignore. The baking video, specially, posed a number of questions that made her stomach sink. Kagami had to face the fact that there was something big that she hadn’t noticed before. 

Not one to be morose or let fixes unfixed, Kagami picked her phone and texted Marinette.

**Kagami** : Hello :) I can come by your place? There’s something I want to talk about.

Marinette’s stomach churned. Had she seen the baking vid comments? Was she gonna call her a bad friend, and ask her to extricate her paws from her boyfriend? Luka had reassured her that Kagami hadn’t seemed upset, but she was a stoic one, and she was perfectly capable of sticking a sword through her heart, as if it was a brochette stick, and Marinette was no more than a deceitful onion.

_ “You are not a deceitful onion,” Luka had said, keeping a smirk at bay. “You are not stinky enough,” he joked. _

_ “Are you not upset?” she had asked.  _

_ “I trust you,” he had said simply, “You say you are moving on, I take your word for it. You say you love me, I believe you mean it. You say there are secrets you can’t share, I imagine it’s about a cake recipe the world is not yet ready for, and I don’t pry. I trust you’ll let me know, if anything changes, right? Why would I be upset? ” _

A shiver went down her spine. She could’ve cried all over again, just remembering that conversation. She took a deep breath, and then another one. Then she grabbed for Luka’s hand and snuggled closer to him.

“Is everything alright, girl?” Alya asked. “Don’t,” she shot at Nino, who was inching closer to her salted caramel macaron. She sighed, “OK, you have it,” she relented.

Marinette giggled, “I’ll make some more, Al, don’t worry.”

“I’m relieved! But, seriously,” the blogger pressed on, never one to let anything slide, “what was it that made you shiver?”

“Oh, it’s nothing serious,” Marinette replied, ‘Kagami wrote. She asks if she can come over. She wants to talk about something.’

“Invite her over,” Luka suggested. “She’s always welcome.”

“Maybe she wants to discuss something private with Mari,” Nino said, “maybe she won't be comfortable doing it with all of us here?”

“You invite her,” Alya told her, “and warn her we are here. Let her decide that.”

It didn’t seem to bother Kagami much, because he showed up at Tom and Sabine’s doorstep half an hour later.

“School uniform today?” Luka observed, “is this affair off the record?”

“I’m doing a Biology project,” Kagami assented, “as far as mother knows. She may have said something about how this month I’m burning through my allotted social gatherings for the year, and I’m not letting her keep me caged, not with my arms crossed.”

“I’m sorry about that,‘ Nino told her, “I know it’s not OK to lie to your family, but,” he shrugged, “they kinda bring it onto themselves when they set awfully strict rules and don’t listen to their kids.”

“Nino enables Adrien a lot,” Alya said fondly, “though we wouldn’t normally be fine with scandalous behaviour like yours and Adrien’s, I think we all agree these are special cases.”

“Thanks,” Kagami said with a courtesy, “I’m really thankful you are so understanding.” She smirked, “And enable us.”

“Anytime,” Luka replied.

“So,” Kagami wanted to know, “what were you doing? I don’t want to interrupt something important.”

“Well,” Mari said, “we were dealing with some EHA stuff, and eating yesterday’s pastries. But we’ve covered those two points already. I can bring some more pastries, if you want, though.”

“No, it’s fine, thanks,” she replied. Her stomach grumbled. “Well, actually, it would be nice, thanks.”

‘I’ll be back in a sec!“ Marinette rose and rushed downstairs.

“So, Kagami,” Alya said, “what did you want to talk about?”

“Several things,” she replied, squaring her shoulders, “for instance, there was something Alix said I didn’t understand.”

“What was it?” Nino offered.

“She usually says lots of weird stuff,” Luka added.

“What is aromantic?” Kagami blurted. The others looked at one another.

“That’s a conversation you should have with Max or Alix sometime, because it’s their jam,” Alya said, “but we can tell you some basic stuff.”

Kagami nodded and looked at the others eagerly.

“So, basically,” Luka started, scratching his neck, “there are different types of attraction, and not all people experience them in the same way, or experience them at all. People who don’t experience attraction are in the ace spectrum.”

“Ace is short for asexual,” Alya chirped.

“So, for example,” Nino said, “ you show a picture of attractive models doing a swimming suit shoot in the snow to Max. He’ll tell you their outfits are inappropriate and they might catch a cold, and think nothing else of it. He doesn't experience lots of sexual attraction, that’s just how he feels.”

“Now, show the same picture to Alix,‘ Alya continued, “she’ll wolf-whistle and comment on how attractive they are. They’ll melt the snow or something. But she’ll tell you she’s never thought of dating, and really can’t relate to Kim’s romantic problems.  _ Why would he want to walk around holding hands? Sap! _ She’ll say.”

“So,” Kagami pondered, “she experiences physical attraction, but not like ermm..?”

“She doesn’t experience romantic attraction,” Luka supplied.

“What are we talking about, you guys?” Marinette asked, bursting in through the trapdoor, platter of macarons in one hand.

“Let me help you with that,” Luka said, taking the platter from her.

“Asexuality,” Alya replied. 

“Oh, okay,” Marinette let a sigh out, kinda relieved, she cuddled next to her boyfriend again and picked a macaron.

“So,” Kagami resumed, picking a macaron as well, “you can or cannot experience sexual attraction, or romantic feelings.” She took a bite, thinking, “I get it.”

“There’s more,” Marinette said. She had been doing her homework and was happy to have insight to supply. “There’s aesthetic attraction, and platonic attraction. Like,” she said, grasping for vivid examples, “take Adrien. Can any of us objectively say he’s not pretty, or aesthetically pleasing, if you will? He’s a model!”

Kagami raised an eyebrow.

So, Marinette elaborated, “He’s eye candy alright, and we all admit that, but that doesn’t mean all of us actually want to kiss him, or walk around hand in hand with him or anything.”

“No?” Kagami inquired, something rubbing her the wrong way.

“No,” Nino said, “I love him, I want to do plans with him, to be important to him, I want him to rely on me... Sometimes I look at him, and I’m shocked at just, how pretty he is, but” , he said as Alya coughed, “I never get an urge to cuddle him or something.” He added, “And I wouldn’t date him,not because there’s Alya, whom i love, but because... the thought is just weird, you know?”

“Is it because he is a boy?” Kagami asked.

“It’s not because he is a boy. It’s just how I feel,” Nino replied.

“How come?” the girl added, tilting her head. She hated finding gaps in her knowledge like this.

“You know,” Luka said, “anyone can like anyone, in any way. It’s not just... boys are boys’ friends, and girls make friends with girls, and girls and boys like each other.” He somehow managed to sound didactical and not patronising.

“I know that,” Kagami said, “but, can you like both? Don’t you... need to choose?”

“You can be attracted to boys AND girls,” Marinette said, “there you have a couple of wild bisexuals in their natural habitat,” and she pointed to Alya and Nino.

“Actually,” Alya said, giving a peck to Nino, “I identify as pan.”

At which Kagami looked at her as if she had sprouted a pair of horns and hooves.

“Which means,” Alya said, “I like people of all genders, not just boys and girls.”

Kagami didn't look any less confused, and she asked for pen and paper, muttering about “so many things she didn’t know about.”

“Let me just,” she said as she started scribbling, “attraction is sexual, romantic, platonic, and... eh... looks? Yes?” she checked. “Or none? Or just some? And then you are asexual?” The others hummed in ascent.

“Boys who like girls, and girls who like boys are hetero,” Luka said, “and people who like people the same gender as them, are homosexuals.”

“Oh, Ondine had said something about being moronsexual..?” Kagami started. “But that was a joke, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Alya smiled. “Other people experience attraction to boys AND girls, and identify as bisexuals. But not everyone is a boy or a girl, so, if you acknowledge that, and still feel attracted, you are pan.”

“Got it. Can you explain more about not being a boy or a girl?” Kagami said, pen in hand expectantly.

“Well,” Luka said, “some people say gender is a spectrum, so you may identify as a boy, or a girl, but some people identify as something in between, or both, or none.”

“Gender, in this economy?” Alya interjected.

“You watch too much Tik-Tok,” Nino told her affectionately.

“It’s about how you perceive yourself, and it has nothing to do with biology,” Marinette added. ‘So if your biological sex and your gender identity match, you are cisgender, and if they don’t you are transgender.“

“But,” Luka added, “some people are not biologically male, or female. They are intersex.“

“I hate Catholic school,” Kagami sighed, scribbling fast.

“I feel for you, sis,” Alya patted her with sympathy. “But know, you’ve had the Talk, and you’re much wiser!”

“The important thing is to accept others, and respect difference,” Nino said, “and you know, just love.”

They continued chatting for a while, discussing and clarifying the labels of people they knew. Soon enough, Luka would start his shift, so he had to go. Alya and Nino stayed a little longer, but Alya had to babysit, so the couple headed to her house not long after that.

Kagami and Marinette went down to the kitchen and started washing the dishes. The house was very quiet, silence only disrupted by the clattering of china.

“Marinette,” Kagami bursted suddenly, “I have a favour to ask of you. You can decline it if it makes you uncomfortable. But, I don’t know if I can ask anyone else.”

“Tell me, I’d love to help,” the other replied, “that’s what friends are for, right?”

Kagami became suddenly serious (more so than usual, at least). She steeled herself, and asked “Will you kiss me?”

“What?!” Marinette blurted, looking at her friend, eyes big and wild like a deer caught in the headlights.

“It’s OK if you’re uncomfortable, forget I asked,” Kagami replied, focusing on the dishes again, “it’s just, I’ve just ever kissed Adrien, and no one else. And I’m not sure how I feel about it anymore. I have no point of reference, and I feel so ignorant... And, you’re my second oldest friend,” she looked up at the other girl, “and I think you are very pretty.”

Marinette finally snapped out of it, “I can do that for you,” she told her, “as a friend.”

“Thanks,” Kagami smiled, “it won’t mean anything, I promise.” She continued rinsing. “I know you are with Luka,” she added after a pause.

They finished the dishes and dried their hands. They stood in front of each other silently.

‘Like, shall we do it now?“ Marinette asked.

Kagami put her hands on the other girl’s shoulders and got closer. She looked at the other straight in the eyes for a moment, but then sighed and looked down, “I don’t know how to do this, actually. I’m sorry I made things awkward.”

“It’s OK,” Marinette told her, cupping her face in her hands, “It’s fine.” She cut the distance and brushed her lips to the other girl’s. It was soft and it didn’t last long. None of them opened their eyes. 

“Oh,” Kagami gasped, grabbing her phone “My ride is downstairs, sorry. I’ve got to go.” She still didn’t let go of Marinette. “Thanks, for everything. I’ve got a lot of thinking to do.” She pressed her lips to her friends again. “Just in case,” she grinned, “you are a good friend,” she pecked her lips again, and with that, she rushed downstairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first kiss in the lips in this fic, and it's friendly Marigami for research purposes?!  
> My awakening had lots to do with my friends becoming single and talking about dating. It didn't add up to me, so I had lot's of thinking to do. I'm not saying Kagami is ace, but talking with people does put stuff in perspective. And that girl is in sore need of perspective.  
> I'm committed to honouring all the relationship tags, and delivering realistic, earnest teen relations. Only, who says romantic or sexual is more important than platonic? I live for Nino's squish on Adrien, it's one of the more impactful relationships in the show.  
> Also, I'm super apprehensive about this chapter, it made my own stomach churn. But once I came up with the idea, I couldn't let it got. It was a side of the story that I felt needed to be made explicit.  
> I guess what I'm saying is, please enjoy the read! Be respectful and compassionate, and be warned we are not tolerant of intolerance.  
> Bug out!


	11. The one where nothing is what it seems

Wayhem had told Adrien that Aurore had told him that she would like it if Adrien would be there in her testimony video, but felt too embarrassed to ask. So Adrien simply offered. He also asked Aurore if she had any preference for host (the current options being Alya, Rose and Lila), to which the girl confessed being a Kitty Section fan, and chose Rose. So that was the line-up (plus Kagami on camera duty) that met in a secret garden near Champs-Elysees. They walked Cours-la-Reine along la Seine up to Avenue Franklin Roosevelt. There was a big marble statue, but not a lot more.

At least, not to the untrained eye. They followed Aurore as she headed to its right. Hidden among the bushes, there was a staircase of broken stones, and down they climbed.

“Never been here before,” Adrien whispered in awe. “I didn’t even know places like this existed in real life!” He looked up. Jardin de la Nouvelle France was so tightly forested that only a tiny patch of blue was visible in between the canopy. 

“Cool, right?!” Wayhem answered a bit too eagerly. Can’t blame him, he was just a boy in a secret garden with three blond teen stars. “Aurore and I often come here for a picnic after school.” He smiled, “We like to sit on this bench in front of the pond, and feed the fish. Sometimes we can see an otter too!”

“Yeah, my grandma would bring me here when I was little,” the tall girl said, “she knew all the nooks and crannies of Paris like the back of her hand.”

“It’s lovely,” Rose sighed, just as starry eyed. “Can we climb that?” she asked, pointing to a bridge of faux logs that crossed the path above them.

They spent some time walking around, marvelled by the little patch of untamed wilderness in the heart of Paris. Snapping a photo at Rose sitting on a staircase, Kagami finally looked at her wrist and said,

“The sun will set in two hours, I think we should start shooting.” To which they all agreed with various degrees of resignation or bashfulness.

Aurore, Wayhem and Adrien sat on a bench, while Rose leaned on the railing that bordered the pond. The camera was placed on the path between them, so they all were visible, though not quite forward facing. They started shooting.

“Hello! My name’s Aurore Beauréal,” she said, “I’m 15 year old and I’m a student at College Francoise Dupont. This is Wayhem, my friend and classmate,” she said, introducing the others, “and I’m sure you know Adrien Agreste and Rose Lavillant, they kindly agreed to help me today. I want to tell you about the time I was first akumatized as Stormy Weather.” She paused.

“I’m sure people watching also know you too, Aurore,” Wayhem said, “you’ve done work on TV. Why don’t you start telling them about that?”

She smiled a small smile and said, “I’ve always wanted to work on TV. Especially, I liked the idea of being a news anchor, and helping people stay informed. I’ve always done my best to look good, and worked with a speech therapist, and an oratory coach. I used to lisp a little, you see.”

“You’ve worked a lot to achieve your goals, and you know, achieved a lot too,” Adrien congratulated her.

“That’s true! You’ve done commercials, and work as a presenter on KIDZ+, you’ve hosted Friendship Day, and...” Rose started listing.

“...and I cover sometimes for Mireille as a weather girl,” Aurore finished. “That was the first thing I did actually, and the one that got me akumatized.”

Adrien thought she looked like she might need a macaron, and wondered at how that thought exactly had crept up in his head. At that moment, Wayhem gave her a side hug, and it seemed to have the desired effect, and Adrien tried to focus on the present.

“You were the runner up in the contest for that position last year, right?” he asked.

“Oh, I remember that!” Rose said ”We had to vote for either you or Mireille, and your faces were plastered all over the city. You looked very pretty in the posters, too!”

“I was really focused on that contest, it was my chance for a breakthrough,” Aurore said, “All my energy was there, I breathed KIDZ+, I had KIDZ+ for breakfast, lunch and dinner, I dreamt of it.”

“You are very driven,” Wayhem told her, “and that’s a very admirable quality!”

“You are being polite. It may be more correct to say I was obsessed,” Aurore rebutted. “I guess,” she continued, “that I liked all the attention. I worked hard, yes, but people were paying attention to me, and it made me feel special. Seen. I basked in it. And then came the final voting. And I lost by a landslide.”

“That would be a major disappointment for anyone, Aurore!” Rose exclaimed.

“Yeah, don’t be too hard on yourself,” Adrien seconded, “it’s not your fault there’s an ax-crazy terrorist taking advantage of your feelings.”

“I was very lucky that many people were understanding, and I got contracts to do other stuff. And Mireille had been great, and we’ve become good friends. I don’t know if I would have gotten any offers had it not been for her. She won’t admit it, but I’m sure she’s had a hand at it.” She looked straight into the camera, “If you are looking at this, thank you, Mireille!”

”I’m very grateful,” she continued, ”But I couldn’t help getting anxious about... just everything: about being akumatized, about having lost my one opportunity, at underachieving at school, at work, at people looking at me weird... Did they pity me? Did they fear me? And then, I got akumatized again,” she said with a sad smirk. “I’m sorry, people of Paris.”

Adrien patted her on the shoulder, “We’ve heard other testimonies of re-akumatized people. If their experience is anything to go by, I’d say the second one is on Hawkmoth, not on you.”

“Well, the first one isn’t on you either,” Rose said, “It’s all on Hawkmoth.” Wayhem nodded. 

“Thanks,” she replied, “watching those testimonies has been a great help too. So, I’m happy I’m sharing mine, in case it helps other people.”

“You’re very brave,” Rose told her, “thanks for sharing, Aurore, and for bringing us here to this beautiful place!" She cut the distance and embraced the other girl.

"I think this is all for today," Adrien gauged, looking at the girls.

"We’ll see you around!” Wayhem added!

“Stay safe!” Rose said, from behind Aurore.

“And stay strong!” the boys said.

With that, they wrapped up the shooting for the day. Rose, Wayhem and Aurore took the equipment back to the school, and Adrien and Kagami followed his bodyguard into his car. They sat in the relative privacy of the passenger seat, and Adrien took hold of her hand.

“Oh,” Kagami said, letting go, and grabbing her phone. “Chloe says her video is up. I think she should see it.”

“Right now?” he asked. “I was hoping...”

“I’d say she feels insecure. She needs scaffolding,” she said. ‘“Please?“

“OK,” he relented, putting his arm across her shoulders and getting closer.

Trying to ease the tension in her frame, she opened the link and pressed play.

_Chloe was in her lavish room at Le Grand Paris. She was in front of her vanity mirror, in her desk, applying blush on her cheeks. She flipped her hair and addressed the camera._

_“Hi! I’m Chloe Bourgeois. And today, I want to unbox some toys I’ve bought with you. Are up to it? Let’s bring them on!” She put three boxes of various sizes on the desk, “I’ve commissioned these from different local small businesses, so they are very exclusive.”_

_She grabbed the middle box, “This one is from La Petite Poupee. They make crochet dolls, and on their website, they look very colourful and detailed. But the box, as you can see, it’s plain cardboard... So what is it going to be? That’s for us to find out!” She opened the box and gasped, “Oh! I wasn’t expecting this! The inside of the box has some design on it... Wait there a paper,” she took it and started reading (not without complaining of the size of the font), “It’s important to reduce waste, so we wanted to give you an extra gift, and help protect the environment. If you open the box, cutting the dotted line, it turns into a room for your doll. Have fun!” She looked at the camera, “That’s actually very nice, good thinking, La Petite Poupee! I’ll try that later. Let’s check the actual doll first....”_

_She took a paper bag out of the box and showed it to the camera, “I guess they do this to protect the doll from the pigments inside the box... Let’s look at you...” she told the doll, her hand inside the bag, “Oh, it’s really soft... and, here she is!”_

_It was a Rena Rouge doll. “I wasn’t sure what they were going to do with her hair,” Chloe commented, “blobs? Lots of loose thread? But I really like how she turned out. The colours are a bit more pastel than the real hero’s costume, but they made a point in keeping her complexion dark. And... Look at her face, there are hand-painted details, like the blush on her cheeks. Oh, look at this too... The pattern on her suit is not added on, it’s part of the main crochet pattern, that can’t be easy to do...”_

_She grabbed the doll’s limbs and made her cross her arms and fold her legs, then make her sit on top of a make-up case. “What do you say, Rena, shall we look at your room?”_

_“Jean!” she yelled over her shoulder, “bring a pair of scissors!” she stopped, “Please!”_

_The butler was promptly by her side, and she started cutting the cardboard box. “This is a bit hard,” she was saying, “I guess the cardboard room will last longer, but a small kid would not be able to do this by themself.”_

_As she finished working, she placed the item in front of herself. “Mmm, these three panels look like a bedroom, and the third looks like a garden. If you have doll furniture, you could place it there.” She grabbed the Rena doll and the case. “Sorry, girl, you’ve just moved. You are not that lucky,” and placed it inside the box-room. Chloe smiled and pushed the toy to the side._

_She got hold of the smaller package now. “This is a soft toy by TS MIni Bears. Their jam is custom mini toys of exotic animals; though they also do bunnies, and teddies, you wanna watch out for their T-Rexes and axolotls... They also offer kits so you can make your own toy, but I ordered a finished one.”_

_She opened the box, and showed the delicate red paper inside. “This looks lush,” she commented, taking in her hands a little bulk wrapped in the same paper, ”Let’s look at you... Oh,” she gasped, “look at her face, it’s too much!”_

_The bee plush snug in the palm of her hand comfortably. “The pattern of the fabric in her wings! And the fluff in her neck.... Look at her hand painted face, and shiny beady eyes... ooooh look at these beads on her head... They look like a crown!” She frowned, “this wouldn’t be a safe toy for a toddler, but anyone older than that can call themselves lucky. Also,” she said, weighing the push in her hand, “it feels real, and heavy... they are supposedly filled with beads inside, to make it heavy... but you really can’t tell, because it feels very soft.”_

_“Oh,” she wailed, pressing the toy to her heart, “it’s too much!” and she placed it on her shoulder. “You’re gonna supervise the next one with me, Pollen.”_

_She positioned the larger package in front of the camera, “This is by Geek 3D prints. They make 3D printed plastic toys with moving parts. They also make moving hand prosthesis, so you definitely want to check it out.”_

_She opened the box, “Let’s see who is here... I’m expecting this toy to move well, and I hope I’m not disappointed!” She took out a Chat Noir action figure, and moved it from side to side._

_‘This is rich! Can you see how the suit and the hair shine? The filament in the face is opaque, but the rest of it has like, silver particles mixed in. It looks really cool. Let’s see how you dance!“ She took his arms, and then legs between her fingers and tested them._

_“The range of movement is quite good, but he kinda keeps his shape if you are not moving him. I like it, Can you detach the baton...? You can detach the baton! Good. This hand is fixed... but the other moves! And his head moves up and down... and to the sides...” She looked at the camera, “This is a great toy, and if it breaks, you can ask Geek 3D Prints to print a spare part, so that’s great!”_

_“I actually have a lot more of these toys,” told them, panning the camera to a big stack of boxes in the bakground. “They are not for me. I’m taking them to a home for orphaned children nearby. Are you coming, or what?”_

_The next scene was set in the institution. Chloe shook hands with an older lady in a suit. The girl looked nervous, but her back was straight. When she went into the dining room, where the children sat in a circle, their faces blurred,. The little ones started murmuring._

_“Is she a princess?“ one asked._

_”There aren’t princesses in France, dummy!” an older girl replied._

_Chloe announced she came bearing gifts, and helped each of them pick a box. Some of the children started screaming, others cried. A little girl clutched a mini plush ladybug to her chest, In a way that eerily mirrored Chloe some moments ago. They all seemed ridiculously happy._

_“The toys were a bit of an overkill,” Chloe confessed to the camera later, in a shot back at the hotel. “These children are clothed, and fed, but they are starving for attention. They have each other, but that's about it. So after giving them the toys, I stayed over for a while. We played mirror,” she said, moving her hand slowly in front of her, “and they loved it. Crazy, right? And we did some human tic-tac-toe, you know, like human chess, but tic-tac-toe. It was fun,” she said._

_‘“But they’ll tell you terrible things, too. Children as old as eight will tell you they are too old, too big for adoption. Let me stress this, they are TINY. I’m not asking you to adopt them, though you should consider children older than... babies, if you actually want to adopt,” she said. ‘But, my point is, places like this really appreciate volunteers. You can help in the kitchen, or teach the children something, help them with homework, or just hang out with them. You will find links to local institutions in our city here, in the link below," she said pointing downwards, "so, give it a thought, OK?“_

_“It’s nice to feel needed,” she reflected, her face turned to the side, “And they really need you.”_

_The next scene was back at the children’s home. Chloe was surrounded by the little ones and there was also the lady in a suit and butler Jean, all waving._

_“Stay strong, and stay safe!” they all chorused._

“Wow, I wasn’t expecting that..!” Adrien said. Kagami interrupted him, putting her phone in front of him to record.

“Start again,” she instructed, ‘I’ll send it to Chloe.“

“Wow, I wasn’t expecting that, Chlo!” he said. “It was so heartwarming! I liked the idea of advertising local small businesses, but giving the toys to the children was a twist I’ve never seen in unboxing videos. It was very original, and generous!”

“I liked it too! You looked like a princess!” Kagami added, and then she sent the audio message.

They arrived at Adrien’s mansion a little while later. They checked in with Nathalie and headed upstairs to his room. The boy closed the door behind him, and as Kagami walked to the windows, her back to them, Plagg darted to the cheese cabinet. 

“I love this time of the day,” she said, looking out. “There’s a warm light that makes everything so much prettier.”

“So romantic, right,” he said, circling her waist with his arm.

“As romantic as you can get,” she said pensively. “Adrien,” she said with a sense of deja vu. “Will you kiss me?”

He complied, eyes closed, kissing her soft, with a small smile of his lips. She tried giving him a peck, changing the pace.

“What is it with you today?” he murmured into her mouth.

She just hummed, trying parting her lips and pulling him closer. It wasn’t working. A shiver shook her, and she had to pull away.

“What is it with you today?” he asked, concerned.

“I think we need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger! That was a conversation too many in any chapter, so, I'll let you know tomorrow.  
> I broke my own heart taking a virtual stroll in Paris. That's something we did a lot with my students in virtual classes, virtual school trip around the world! British Museum, Nature reserve in Congo, Berlin Zoo, Hollywood TV studios, Loch Ness, we even took a tour to the planets of the solar system! ... It's nice to be out and about, damned be my sources, who made me yearn for stuff I can't have:
> 
> https://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/29/travel/29gardens.html  
> https://www.messynessychic.com/2013/08/08/my-secret-champs-elysees-garden/  
> https://www.google.com/maps/place/Jardin+de+la+Nouvelle+France/@48.8649914,2.3112893,17z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x47e66fda9b70d8b9:0x806876d9a15e23b3!8m2!3d48.8651951!4d2.3108894
> 
> Also, I invented two of the shops, based on ones I know, but TS Mini Bears is real, and appeared some days ago on my IG feed. It's in Ukraine though, but, you go give them some love.
> 
> https://www.instagram.com/tsminibears/
> 
> Also, I have a long history with Miraculous fanfic that involve macarons as comfort food. You can check my minicomi Foul Weather Friends here: https://www.instagram.com/miraculous.lady.drawing/guide/comic-foul-weather-friends/17919214084484320/


	12. The one with love hiccups

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rescue team picks the pieces of adrigami.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy your mug of adrimarino (?) and ladynoir.

After they had The Talk with Kagami, (and Marinette summoned the courage to tell them about The Kiss) Alya, Nino, Luka and Marinette had been monitoring their friends, in case their relationship got shaky, and moral support was needed. They all texted Adrien and Kagami frequently, sent them cat memes, and TikTok dances, and had a plan of action in case filth hit the fan. It was decided that the best line-up was Nino and Marinette aiding Adrien, and Luka and Alya going to Kagami. Firstly, getting your broken heart tended to by a steady couple could be foul, so they had to split; secondly, a mix of friends from different genders could help even things up and give more balanced support; and thirdly, if Kagami actually had budding feelings for Marinette, she wasn’t the best suited to ease her pain, Alya, on the other hand, had much more queer know-how. Now, in all households there was a box of sweets ready to grab and make a run for it. So they waited.

Filth hit the fan on Friday. Kagami had simply texted Alya, “I broke up with Adrien”, and calmly accepted the offer to hang out with Luka and her. Nino, on the other hand, was on the verge of having a panic attack. He couldn’t get hold of either Adrien or Marinette. He had decided to grab his bike and head towards Adrien’s home. (Un)luckily for him, Hawkmoth had set his eyes on a different victim today, so apparently neither himself or Adrien became akumatized. Not even Kagami. But he was stuck at home, with no news of his best bud. Boy, he had mixed feelings alright. He opened the box of macarons and took a bite while he waited.

***

“Pound it!” Ladybug and Chat Noir celebrated, as the miraculous cure healed the city around them. After comforting the victim, who hugged her loved ones, apologised profusely and thanked them some more, they both had four beeps to go in their timers. 

“Are you alright?” she asked him, eying his slouching figure and his lacklustre smile.

He shrugged, “Civilian stuff.”

She bit her lip, “Wanna climb up the Arc? We got some time.”

“Sure,” he sighed.

In a matter of seconds, they were on top of the landmark. The heroes plopped down, their legs dangling.

“Can you use a hug?” she offered.

“I could,” he accepted.

“What was it?” she nudged, “I mean, you can tell me, if you want. I’m your friend, and I’m here for you... or maybe you don’t wanna, but, I’m still here, OK?”

“My girlfriend dumped me.”

“Oh,” she hesitated, “sorry about that.”

“I don’t think I can tell you about it, can I?” he checked.

“I don’t think so,” she lamented, “but you have my love and sympathy, OK? Give me a call and we can race the rooftops and vent, OK?”

“Thanks, LB,” he said, kissing her shoulder. “We should get going, but, I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah, OK,” she told him. “See you.”

They headed separate ways, and found their phones flooded with messages almost at the same time. NIno’s mounting panic was painful to read. Adrien apologised and said he was taking a shower when the akuma alert hit, so he changed quickly before he was dragged to the panic room, and had left his phone behind. Marinette apologised some more, and said she was delivering some orders when the akuma attacked, she had dropped her phone and it was broken, but luckily it got fixed when the attack was over. 

Nino took a big deep breath, and exhaled relief. His friends said they were coming to his place, and Mari was bringing treats (macarons at Nino’s had been depleted).

Marinette arrived first, puffing, cheeks as red as the berry macarons she came bearing. She was in the bathroom, fixing herself when Adrien arrived, a little bit more composed but blushing just as hard. The two guests sat awkwardly in the host’s bedroom, while the later prepared a flask with hot chocolate. Marinette grabbed a macaron and started munching, more to have something to do with her mouth and hands, rather than because she was hungry.

“Bad day for love, ah?” he said at last.”Well, technically it was yesterday for me, but...”

She spat some macaron, and stared at him. ‘Sorry,“ she coughed.

He laughed, "I mean, I heard the akuma victim today had love troubles too.”

“Maybe you’re right,” she said, swallowing, “a friend told me their relationship was..” she slid her finger across her neck, “caput, no more... dead? I’m sorry.”

“Hey, maybe it’s Mercury retrograde,” he joked.

“Venus retrograde, you mean,” she snickered.

“ _ It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves, _ ” he recited dramatically, his fist to the sky.

“It’s the fault in our stars! Hey,” she exclaimed, ‘since when do we quote John Green?“

“I dunno about you, I was quoting Shakespeare,” he laughed.

“Pardon me and my public school curriculum, Mr Homeschooled,” she said in mock solemnity. She stuck out her tongue, and took another bite of her macaron.

At that moment, Nino stood at the other side of the door, carrying a tray with three mugs and a flask. “Help, I’ve got no hands,” he pleaded.

“On my way,” Adrien said, springing up to open the door.

“Thanks, bud, I didn’t really think things through back there.”

“Never fret, I’ve got your back,” Adrien said, “at least until you sprout a third arm.”

‘Then you’re on your own, pal,“ Marinette added.

“Ha ha, you think yourselves funny,” Nino scorned them, “maybe I’m not feeling like sharing hot chocolate with you anymore.”

“We’re terribly sorry, oh notable, nifty Nino” Adrien said, hand to his chest, “Noble nurturer with nourishing nectar.”

“Run away, Mari,” Nino warned her, “Adrien’s afflicted with alliteration, it won’t abate, it’s abominable and contagious!”

She laughed so hard she started hiccuping.

“You messed that last one, bud,” Adrien told him, “but you’re getting better.”

“Hey, not all of us spent our childhood browsing a thesaurus,” Nino shot.

“Touche,” Adrien admitted, as he started pouring the hot drink in the mugs. 

“So,” Nino told him, grabbing the mug, “spill the beans. How are you, bud?”

“A bit sad?” Adrien started temptatively, “a bit relieved? A bit embarrassed that I feel relieved? Also, like a pile of unwanted trash?” He shrugged.

“Wow, that’s a lot to unpack!” Nino whistled.

“Mmm, A-(hiccup)-drien, do you want to tell us what Ka-(hiccup)-gami said to,” she paused, “you(hiccup). Dammit! So-(hiccup)-rry.”

“She said that she had realised something important. Like, she made a lot of new friends lately? And got to hang out with a lot of people, and with couples, and something started bothering her?”

“I feel bad for her, she had it just as bad as you,” Nino told Adrien. “If not worse.” Marinette hiccuped in ascent.

“She said she wants to be important to me, and hang out with me, and be close. And that she thinks I am attractive. And like, she used to think that the only type of relationship she could have with a guy was romantic. So she pursued me romantically.”

“I remem-(hiccup)-ber she saying that you are (hiccup) her best friend, like ever,” Marinette tried to say.

“Yeah, she said that. So it was, like, she didn’t have a point of reference. But then, as she met more people, she realised she didn’t feel for me differently than other friends. She said...”

“Tell us, bud,” Nino nudged.

“She said she kissed a friend, to check? And that she actually felt more excited about that? Can you believe it? Who could that be?”

Nino and Marinette looked at one another, and Mari put up her hand (and hiccuped.)

Adrien’s eyes opened big, “Oh, what? Really?”

She hiccuped, and nodded, “Sorry. I did it for friendly purposes.”

“OK. Wow, Oh. OK. Cool, cool, cool,” he muttered. “Wow, OK. Did dhe...? OK, makes sense, OK.”

Nino patted his shoulder. “Sorry, bud. She basically told you you are just a good friend, then?”

“I mean, she either feels for me like a friend, or she is equally attracted to other people? Either way it’s problematic. She says she could see us hurting each other in the long run, so we should better break up now and preserve our friendship. Because... I’m very precious to her.”

“That’s very mature of her,” Nino said. “Sorry again, pal.”

“The worst thing is, she is right, you know?” Adrien said, sipping his hot chocolate mug. “What she said rang true to me. I also find her attractive, and want to be close? But, like, it’s not with her that I fantasise about running away to an island, and having a hamster, and....” he paused. “It made me feel ashamed.”

Mari passed a macaron to him silently (except for the occasional hiccup, that is.)

“It also made me feel shitty, you know?” Adrien continued, “Is that what I’ll always be to everyone, a cute baby-faced, good friend? It was what you or Mari, or L... another friend, told me, all over again. Won’t anyone ever actually be attracted to me? Just gold-diggers, maybe, after my fame, or my status, or my money? It’s pathetic.”

“For what’s worth,” Marinette said, “I do find you attrac-(hiccup)-tive. Banging hot.”

“For what’s worth,” he replied, eyeing her, “I think you’re very hot too,” and they clinked their mugs. 

Nino did his best to hide his laughter, but he couldn’t help it anymore. They all laughed hard, and soon Adrien was hiccuping too.

The rest of the afternoon went by pleasantly. They played video games, and listened to Nino’s mixes, to help him choose the one that he’d post next. The sun was setting when Adrien’s bodyguard honked, signalling it was time for him to go. The three friends said their goodbyes, promising to make plans to hang out during the weekend.

When Marinette finally plummeted on her bed, Tikki lightly perched on her chest, she found she had a lot of thinking to do too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I channel my inner alliterative dork into these dudes. I regret nothing.


	13. The one when scrapbooking went south

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Live streams can go unexpected. 13 is not a lucky number.

Only two weeks had gone by since class 4B and MHA had launched the EHA Patreon, but their project had come a long way. Most series were up and had received positive feedback, there were a good number of testimonies up too, and patrons had engaged meaningfully. Max had set up a special chat room feature for their community to network, and an anonymous testimony wall was added too, so that patrons could share their akuma experience as well. As a number of celebrities and public figures had not only pledged significant money, but also advertised the kids’ endeavours vocally, EHA had caught the attention of the media, and had been covered in websites, radio and newspapers. Even more patrons had joined after that. Their projections were looking bright, and they imagined that they would be able to fund significantly at least the top 3 NGOs that they had selected.

There were many reasons to celebrate and share, so they decided to make a special event with Rose’s scrapbooking series. It was a stroke of genius really: it was a creative strategy to tell patrons about their progress, it would stream live and be co-hosted by their most popular members, so engagement would be fostered, and questions could be addressed. And so, Rose was scheduled to scrapbook EHA live on Sunday evening.

They had secured special permission to stay at school and put up their set in the art room. Four cameras were placed strategically to show Rose, her work, and the hosts from two different angles, which Max and Marcov would manage as Nino saw fit. Mylene and Juleka fixed the lights and prepped everyone’s make-up. Luka, Alya and Alix would host, and Adrien, Sabrina, Nath, Marc and Chloe would stand-by to answer questions if the viewers required them. Kim and Ivan were present too, but mostly as ‘strong dudes’ to help move and manage stuff. There was a lot of stuff. Kagami stayed at home, because, in her own words, she’d been pushing her luck lately. Lila had a prior commitment, so in her own words, she was sorry she couldn’t grace them with her presence. Marinette was at home, because, in her own words, she was buried under a dreadful dumpster of overdue deadlines.

“Do you think she’s too mortified to address Adrien’d fangirls,” Alya asked Nino, “now that they are shipping them together, he and Kagami are no longer an item?”

“Dunno,” he shrugged, “maybe she still hasn’t gotten over the hiccup. Or the alliterative disease.”

“I do have a lot of work due,” Marinette told Tikki, “they don’t need to know part of it involves patrolling Paris clad in a red polka dotted suit.”

“I still hope we manage to watch part of the live stream,” the red kwami said. “It’s an important landmark!”

“We should better get going then, ah?” the girl said as she stood up. “You ready? Tikki, spots on!”

***

Everything was going according to plan. Rose was showing some photo or clipping regarding some of their work or an important milestone for EHA, and while she wrote in beautiful lettering, or cut, pasted and stuck colourful bits of paper, washi tape or stickers, the hosts chatted animatedly and read the comments of the viewers, shooting the occasional question to the members in stand-by. It had been wise to spare Adrien of hosting duty, because Alya expertly glossed over most keysmashing comments directed at him, voicing only interesting or genuine questions.

It was too good to last long.

Alix was telling about her favourite entries for the #complimentchallenge, which had been trending and getting some traction nation-wide, when one comment caught Luka’s eye. “help,” it said simply all in lower case.

“That was a good one, Alix,” he interrupted her. ”Hello, sadmelon!” he said, “is everything alright?”. It was perfectly possible that it was just someone who wanted to catch their attention, he reasoned, but there was no harm in checking. There was a prompt reply.

**sadmelon** : I feel bad i think an akuma is targeting me help

The hosts looked at one another. 

“We’ve got your back, melon,” Alya said. “Are you at home?”

**sadmelon** : im on the run the buterfly is chasin me

“Max, can melon join the stream?‘ Alix yelled. Rose ran to Max to check what was going on.

“Is there a possibility we are talking about a regular moth?” Luka wondered.

“Well, moths usually go out at this time of the day,” Alya reasoned. “Maybe melon is a bit stressed and needs reassurance. I know i jump up when I see something with wings coming my way.”

“Hello, melon!” Rose greeted, sitting down at her workbench again. “Can you accept the invitation we sent you? If we can see you, we can probably help.”

In that moment, a young person appeared on the lower half of their screens. Shiny tears trickled down their face, lit by a nearby street lamp. 

“Thank goodness you believe me!” they blurted at the front camera. “There it comes!” melon wailed, flipping to the main camera. They all could recognise it. A neon purple spot was indeed, floating closer and closer, slowly but steady. No one at EHA’s studio breathed. A blur took over the lower half of the screen. Adrien made a run for it.

“I’m running for it!” melon whimpered, “I’m trying to get to the square!”

“What square is it, melon?” Luka said in a level voice. 

“If you tell us the address,” Alix pressed, “we can send help.”

“Samuel, Rousseau,” melon panted. “Saint-Dominique, corner,” they managed in between huffs, “Rue Casimir, Perier...”

“I’ve uploaded an alert in the Ladyblog,” Alya told melon, “And Chloe is calling her dad, Major Bourgeois. Help is on its way.”

“I’m here,” melon announced, “should I hide? Can I hide?” They sobbed, “oh, I don’t wanna be an akuma!”

“Listen to me, melon,” Luka said, “you’ve outrun it, and bought some time. That’s very brave and clever. You’re doing a good job.”

Melon sobbed on.

“That’s right, you’re doing good,” Rose said. “I’m sorry you’re upset. You did good in contacting us. Are you a patron?”

“Yes,” melon said in a quivering voice, “I love Kitty Section! I’m so embarrassed!”

“Melon,” Alix said, “You can’t hide from the akuma, but you can try to calm down, and that will keep it away from you.”

The young person nodded, and then started crying harder than ever. “I’m so sorry, it’s... stuff happened? And now I’m so scared.”

“It’s alright,” Rose said, “listen to me. Focus on me, OK? Take a deep breath, in through the nose,” she inhaled, “and out through the mouth,”

she exhaked.

“Keep that up, Rose!” Nino told her. “Show her on screen, and can you make it so only we see melon, Max?” Max nodded, they didn’t need another Red Hawkmoth day.

“Good”, Rose was saying, ”do it again. Take a nice, big, deep breath... in through the nose.... Out through the mouth.”

Luka grabbed Mylene, his guitar, and stood behind Rose. Mylene whispered in the small girl’s ear while she gave breathing instructions to melon.

“Good job,” she said, “Mylene and I sing a song when we are going through challenging feelings. Luka says he can play it for us. Do you know Smelly wolf, melon?”

The poor person opened their eyes big and nodded, “Yes, you played it, in your IG stream, last month!”

“Great, let’s sing it together!” Rose smiled. Luka plucked a soft arpeggio, and the girls started serenading.

_ “Smelly wolf, smelly wolf / Stinky breath and slimy drool,”  _ Mylene and Rose said softly.

“ _ Smelly wolf, smelly wolf / Stinky breath and slimy drool,”  _ melon quaked.

Rose gave them a thumbs up and continued, _ ”Smelly wolf, smelly wolf / You're just a silly...!” _

The other kids at EHA studio joined, singing softly and clapping,  _ “Smelly wolf, smelly wolf / Trapped in the stinky hut / Smelly wolf, smelly wolf / I'm gonna kick your....”  _

A red blurr obscured their view, and then the camera showed nothing but the purple sky. They fell silent.

“

GOTCHA!,” a female voice screamed. “No more evil doing for you little akuma!”

“LADYBUG!” EHA gasped.

“Bye, bye, little butterfly!,” the hero said, as she released from her yoyo the now purified neon-white bug.

In the art studio, everyone was cheering and hugging. Sabrina had picked Chloe up and Nathaniel was crying on Marc’s shoulder.

Chat Noir appeared on screen, apparently picking melon’s phone from the floor.

“You seemed to have dropped this, pal,” he told melon. At which melon started sobbing harder than ever.

“That was scary, sure thing,” the cat hero said, rubbing the victim’s back. “But it’s alright now.”

“I met... all my (hiccup) idols today,” melon replied, face smeared with sweat and tears, “and I’m wearing (hiccup) my pajamas!”

“Ladybug! Chat Noir!” Alya called, “This is Alya Cesaire, Ladyblogger and EHA member.”

“Hello, Alya,” Ladybug greeted. 

(“Is she here too? Don’t look at me, Alya!” melon wailed.)

“You arrived very fast, how did you learn from this akuma alert?” Alya asked, reporter mode on.

“I was notified by the Ladyblog,” Chat said.

“I was watching the stream,” ladybug confessed. “I want to congratulate you all, especially you,” she told melon, “for how well you handled today’s situation.”

“Ladybug, Chat Noir, are you willing to take part in a Q&A here on EHA’s platform?” the reporter tried her luck.

The heroes looked at one another, and shrugged.

“Yeah, sure.”

“Why not.”

Claps and cheers redoubled.

“We’ll take this everyday hero home,” Chat Noit told them, scooping melon up in his arms.

“Stay safe, and stay strong!” Ladybug said. “Bug out.”

The chat in the live stream went insane after that.


	14. The one with a gratuitious slumber party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ladybud and Chat Noir share a braincell in the aftermath of the almost-akumatization live stream.

“Here’s a thought,” Ladybug finally told him, her mind made-up at last. “Hear me out,” she started, but then bit her lip.

“I’m all ears,” Chat Noir nudged. The heroes had dropped the victim in a friend’s home, and followed through with the promise of racing the rooftops. He had de-transformed briefly to check in with his classmates and with his father’s assistant. De-tranforming wasn’t strictly necessary, because none of them had activated their powers, but he was on a short leash as it was, and it was never a good idea to make anyone worry if it could be helped. Having told his father he was at Nino’s and Nino he was at his father’s, Chat Noir was perfectly content to be out of his civilian skin.

“I think,” she tried again, “that we should either split guardianship duties, or you should tell me your identity.”

That wasn’t what he was expecting. 

“Do you think it would be any safer? Shouldn’t all the kwami be together?” he said, more as a rhetorical question than anything.

“Well, I think we should ask them about that. We should have a good chat with them all. And it’s kinda too much for me alone, and you should be there too! And I cannot just take the whole box around to the top of the Eiffel tower! We cannot like, meet in my bedroom!”

“Why cannot we do that?”

“I might just as well tell you my identity!”

“I wouldn’t figure you out just based on your bedroom!” he looked at her and read worry in her face, “You think I would? Wait, don’t answer that.”

“Maybe I’m reading too many love square fics,” she mused. 

“You read those?” he raised an eyebrow.

“I want to check just how off the general public is,” she tried to backpedal. “Only when I want to get a good laugh!”

“Don’t heed any attention to them, m’lady. I never read what the press says about me.”

“I talked with Tikki and Plagg when we de-transformed,” she resumed.

“What did they say?”

“They didn’t agree with each other. There’s stuff that you don’t know about... stuff I don’t know very much about either, honestly. And I dunno, maybe we’d be better off if we knew? Maybe Bunnix will come back to chastise me again.”

“When did that happen?!”

She just gave him a pointed look for an answer.

“What if we recruit people in our team?” he suggested. “Not all identities were revealed to Hawkmoth...”

“We cannot use Marinette again,” she interrupted curtly, tired of that conversation already.

“You’re talking about revealing our identities, how is that different?” he said, annoyed.

“It is! Cannot tell you though. I’m sorry,” she sighed. “Hey, what about Adrien? He rejected the miraculous last time, but maybe he’s willing to help now...”

“That won’t work!” he blurted. “Have my word for it, OK?”

“Why are you so set against it? He’s a good kid, brave, responsible...” she listed.

“We cannot, I can’t tell you why, but, just believe me, OK?”

She grunted in frustration. “Why is it all so hard?”

“Probably because Hawkmoth doesn’t do any therapy,” he shrugged.

“Pff,” she laughed bitterly. “He could really use some, right?”

“Maybe he does go to therapy,” Chat theorised, “but talks about other stuff. Or maybe he doesn’t, and the therapist encourages him to go get it.”

“Do you think Mayura could be the therapist? And that’s why she started helping him?” she asked wide eyed.

“She took the modelling clay technique and gave it a twist to make the amok!” he said, snapping his fingers.

Ladybug laughed harder than ever, until she started hiccuping.

“Oh, (hiccup) no!” she lamented, ‘not (hiccup) again!“

“It’s the curse of having the funniest partner around, m’lady,” he said as he rubbed her back. “Same happened to me and some friends the other day..”

“Do you (hiccup) think EHA can pay for Hawk-(hiccup)-moth’s therapy?” she wondered.

“We’ve been looking at this problem from the wrong angle all this time!” he beamed, “You're a genius! We don’t need to fight him, we need to take him to meditation sessions!”

They both snickered.

“But seriously, those EHA kids (hiccup) are doing an amazing job,” she said. “If they hadn’t managed to de-(hiccup)-escalate that situation, I’m sure we would now be (hiccup) dodging laser beams!”

“Or swimming in lava,” he offered.

‘Shhh! That hasn’t happened (hiccup) yet!“ she warned. ‘You’ll jinx it!“

“Here’s another idea,” he said, “why don’t you take the kwamis with you, maybe one or two at a time? You can chat with them, and maybe they have some opinions about possible holders.”

“I’ll talk with Tikki and the others about that,” she replied, “maybe it’s not such a crazy idea. You ask Plagg what his opinion is. Maybe you can take some kwami’s with you too.”

“More kwami’s to babysit? I’m not sure I’m looking forward to it,” a shiver ran down his spine.

‘Don’t be like that, I’m sure they’ll end up babysitting you.” She reconsidered, “I’ll send the nice ones to you, I promise.”

“Hey, your hiccups are gone!” he pointed out. She hiccuped.

“You jinxed (hiccup) it!” she punched his arm.

In the end they didn’t decide on any course of action, but they headed home with their hearts lighter. “It was nice to hang out without a timer,” he told her.

“Sure thing,” she agreed and swung away.

He detransformed and started walking. 

“Damn it,” he whispered, face palming. He couldn’t go home, or Nino’s, or any of his classmates. Was he to spend the night on a rooftop? 

“Calm down, Adrien,” Plagg said. ‘Were all your classmates at school with Nino today?“

“Kagami wasn’t,” Adrien replied. “But it would be weird to go sleep on her couch, right? And there’s no way her mom doesn’t tell my dad.”

“I see, have you got cheese?” the kwami asked.

Adrien searched in his pockets. “Lila wasn’t there...”

“She’s a no go,” Plagg warned, munching on some camembert.

“I know!” Adrien said. He went into a gas station, and after looking around, he unlocked his phone. “Please, pick up...”

_ “Hello?” _

“Marinette?” he smiled, “erhm, can I crash in your home?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear to God I'm trying to keep the love square trash out of this fic, but... I'm weak!  
> This chapter touches on some ideas of kwamihood I explored in a comic called "Bound", you may want to check it out in my IG @miraculous.lady.drawing, or under the hashtag #BoundMLBfancomic


	15. The one with an abundance of doubles and identity blunders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some light-hearted Fluff and Crack after a stressful Sunday.

In retrospective, Adrien could see he shouldn’t have assumed the Dupain-Chengs had a guest room. As he put on a huge T-shirt of Tom’s, he decided he would bask in their kindness and be as chill as possible about the current situation. Plagg for some reason seemed delighted about the slumber party, but Adrien assumed it was about the cheese Danishes. To be truthful, he was excited about those too. He put some toothpaste on his finger and rubbed his teeth.

The two teens squabbled briefly over who would take the mattress on the floor and who would sleep in Marinette’s bed.

“You are my guest, I insist you take the bed,” she argued.

“What if I fall from there? It would be more responsible if you took the higher ground,” he countered, eying the girl’s bed perched on a mezzanine.

Adrien won in the end. He laid down on the mattress, assessing his surroundings. Plagg would probably have to sleep in the messenger bag, otherwise Marinette would see him from above. Maybe he should have accepted the higher ground.

“Hey,” he called to the en-suite bathroom, “do you mind if i play some music?”

“It’s fine!” Marinette yelled back. So he searched in his phone and put Nino’s [ playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3RXZHFnlUf2sssFDZSmKhC?si=50646a2966014f67)on. He’d made a habit of listening to it before going to sleep these last few days.

“He’s already seen you in PJs, you know?” Tikki said softly.

“I know!” Marinette whisper-screamed, “It doesn’t make it any better.”

“It’ll all be fine,” the kwami reassured her, before swishing into her purse.

Marinette steeled herself and went into the bedroom. “Oh,” she smiled, “I love this song!‘

Adrien propped himself up, “It’s Nino’s upbeat, feel-good playlist.”

“Great, I like listening to it before going to bed!” she told him.

“Really? Me too!”

Maybe it was that they were tired after a long day, maybe it was the conditioning to the music. The thing is, both teens were sound asleep before long. You know what they say, when the holders are away, the kwami will play. Hold important meetings. You get the idea.

***

Adrien woke up at 6 a.m., and the first thing he did was check on his kwami. Plagg was snoozing inside the messenger bag. _One would think he was up all night_ , Adrien thought fondly. It was early, truth be told, so he got back into bed, and just looked around, admiring the view from the window, the shimmering specks of dust floating by as sunlight illuminated them, and the little details of the room around him. He stretched, arms above his head, toes curling. He was very well rested. _Maybe I should move the mattress around my room_ , he thought.

At 6:55 a.m., he went into the bathroom and changed into his day clothes. He could hear Marinette’s alarm ringing, louder and louder. However, she wasn’t up when he went out.

“Mari?” he called, to no avail. He chuckled, and decided to climb up the stairs and check on the girl. She was sprawled and didn’t show any signs of waking up anytime soon.

“Mari?” he nudged softly, “you need to get up, or we’ll be late for school.”

She grumbled unintelligibly, so he tried again. Something clicked in her mind this time, because she sprung upright.

“Adrien! Wh..? Wha..?” she mumbled, pinching herself for a good measure.

“I’ll be down, OK?” he started to climb down the stairs, barely managing to keep laughter at bay.

She flew into the bathroom. No amount of face washing made her blush abate. On the flipside, it was a rare occurrence for her to be so wide awake this early, so she decided it would be time better spent on having a proper breakfast, and finally went down to the kitchen.

“Plain coffee is fine by me, ma’am” Adrien was telling her mother.

“You can call me Sabine, darling,” she told him as she poured a mug for him. “Extra sugar for you, sweetie?” she checked with her daughter.

“Yes, thanks,” she accepted, plopping down and rubbing her eyes.

“Here’s some fresh fruit, and toast, here’s some jam and cheese,” Sabine told the teens. “I’ll be down in the bakery, OK?”

“Thanks, Sabine!” Adrien beamed.

“Thanks, mom!” Marinette said.

“Would you like some orange juice?” the girl said, eyeing the fruit basket.

“That sounds great!” he replied, looking around. He tilted his head to the side, as she started squeezing the fruit. “Oh! You meant...? You don’t need to bother!”

“It’s fine, don’t worry,” she told him. “Hey, have you seen Alix’s video?”

“Nop,‘ Adrien replied.

“I haven’t either.” She cut another orange, “With don’t you play it on your phone, and we watch it while we eat?”

He prepared it, and offered to peel some peaches while she finished making the orange juice. She sat down, placing two glasses on the table, and accepted a slice of fruit. She spread some cheese on her toast and topped it with the peach.

“That looks yummy,” he said, pressing play.

“I’ll prepare you one,” she offered, and the two of them focused on the video. 

Alix was sitting with Nathaniel, Mylene and Alya on the floor at the school’s art room. 

_“Hi, I’m Alix Kubdel,” she said, “I’m 16, and I attend College Francoise Dupont. These are my friends Nath, Mylene and Alya. Thanks for coming, guys!” she told them. She addressed the camera again, “I wanna tell you about the time I was akumatized as Timebreaker.”_

_“That happened on your birthday, right?” Nath asked._

_“Yes, that’s right. I’d had lunch with my dad, and he had given me a watch as a present. He said it was a family heirloom, and I should be very careful with it. It was incredible, really. Then I went to the park to meet my friends, and race Kim. For the record, I won.”_

_“It’s interesting, how many akumatizations revolve about birthdays, right?” Mylene observed._

_“There was Nino, on Adrien’d b-day, this one, oh! Mari’s grandma was akumatized on Mar’s b-day, right?” Alya listed._

_“Birthdays are challenging days, I think. Everything that it’s normal and easy to cope with becomes big, because like,” Nath said, “there is so much expectation around that day... Good stuff is great, lousy stuff is horrible, you know?”_

_“People get akumatized in all sorts of important days, I think,” Mylene said. “Like, Ivan on the first day of school? And my dad on the premiere of his show?‘_

_“There was also Thomas Astruct, the director dude, on the premiere of his film!” Alix remembered._

_“And the Bourgeoises on their anniversary day,” Alya said. “I guess it cannot be helped to feel strongly about big stuff.”_

_“I guess that noticing the pattern helps,” Alix reflected. “If you are aware of it, you can try to be more patient, and kind, and be on the lookout.”_

_“That’s a good piece of advice,” Nath said. “I should write it down,” he muttered to himself something about plotlines for “adventures”._

_“So, I guess I was specially emotional that day,” Alix continued. “All my friends from school were there, cheering at the race. I gave them the watch, you know, so I wouldn’t drop and break the unique and valuable goods I was just given.”_

_“I’m sorry to say we ended up dropping and breaking the unique and valuable goods we were just given all the same,” Alya bit her lip. “Sorry again, gal.”_

_“The irony, right?” Alix scoffed. “It’s all cool, though. It ended up getting fixed by the miraculous cure in the end.”_

_“You don’t remember what happened in between, right?” Nath asked. Alix shook her head._

_“To be honest,” said Mylene, “I don’t understand what I remember, anyhow.”_

_“I know what you mean,” Alya scratched her head. “There was like a portal, and like another copy of Timebreaker came in with Ladybug. And then there was another Ladybug. But only one Chat. I’m sure that some time travel must have been involved.”_

_Alix opened her eyes really big, ”I haven’t heard that theory before! Crazy, ah?”_

_“I mean,” Nath said, “a watch? Timebreaker? You know these things usually follow a pattern.”_

Marinette spat some toast and Adrien choked and coughed on the coffee.

“Look at the time!” she exclaimed.

“Oh, wow! Time flies when you eat!” he spluttered, “We should go to school, ah?” He stood up, and grabbed his bag.

“Oh, yes! Of course!” she agreed, ‘Let’s get going!“

The walk to school was exceedingly short, but they both had the urge to grab at topics for conversation.

“Those hair clips are very pretty, Mari!” he told her.

“Ah, ha ha, yeah. Hey, what are your plans for the evening?”

“Oh, Mylene asked me to go to Andre’s for some ice cream,” he replied.

“What?”

“Oh, that didn’t sound right,” he realised. “A bunch of us are going to try and find Andre, because Mylene is impersonating him and she wants to shoot something with him.”

“Oh...ah. Oh!” she articulated.

“Yeah, she said she wanted us to participate in a game too? But I don’t know very well what it is about,” he continued.

“Mmm, yeah. I think she mentioned something,” she said contorting her face in a memory effort.

“You should come along! If you are free, that is!” he invited.

“Sure!” she said, climbing the school stairs. “Sounds fun!”

***

After school, Mylene, Ivan, Kim, Alix, Alya, Nino, Adrien and Marinette headed towards Pont des Arts, where they had read Andre would be that day. There was a nice breeze and a clear sky. The teens walked silently, simply happy to hang out with friends after the stressful events of the previous evening.

“Oh, there he is!” Mylene exclaimed, pointing at the ice cream cart sitting by the river. She approached to tell the glacier about the video impersonating him, and asking for permission to include a clip of themselves buying ice-cream from him, and playing nearby.

“He says he’s honoured,” Mylene relayed back to her friends. “He says he’s a patron!”

They filmed the exchanges with Andre, as each of them were getting their usual order. 

Andre beamed in their direction, “You're welcome, my friends. Enjoy André's ice-cream. May love never end!” He turned his attention to Mylene and Ivan, “Striking young Ivan and dear sweet Mylène! If you aren't still the cutest lovebirds I've seen!”. He winked at them as he scooped an ice-cream for them. “Chocolate, praline, and white nougat for you!” he announced, “A special concoction to keep your love true!”

He turned to the next pair, “Earnest Nino, and Nifty Alya! It;s always a pleasure to have you back! Coconut, banana, and a touch of passion fruit for you! May your days never be blue!” 

He eyed Kim and Alix next. He seemed apprehensive for a bit, before saying in sing-song, “Two orders of strawberry and blueberry for the big lad and the petite lady!”

“I bet I can finish mine first,” she told him.

“We’ll see!” he replied.

It was Adrien and Marinette’s turn to approach the cart.

“Ah...!” the vendor started. Mylene lanced him with a stare.

“Love can give both trouble and hope,” he said. “Let’s scoop a nice mix for a good pair of friends! Eat these, and your heartache may come to an end! For him. strawberry with black chocolate chips, because his true love nothing can eclipse. Peach for her and blueberry ice-cream for both. Lighten your heart, don’t be morose.”

They graciously accepted their ice-cream and sat down on the benches with the others. Kim was rubbing his temples and Alix was pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Who won?” Adrien asked.

“I’d say it’s a double loss,” Alya assessed.

“You shouldn’t wolf ice-cream down like that,” Nino scolded them. “It’s a sin, and brain freeze is punishment from the divine. ” 

“So, Mylene, what game did you want us to play?” Marinette asked.

“Oh, right... Erhm, I have some improv prompts here, and I thought we might pair up and act them out. You know, to lighten the mood.”

“Sounds fun, I’m in,” Alix said.

“Let’s do it!”

They positioned the cameras and got ready to start.

“Now my friends and I are going to play an improvisation game!” Mylene told the camera. “I’m going to give them characters and a situation, and they have to improvise a short scene, on the spot. Let’s see who’s the funniest. Are you ready?” 

“I was born ready,” Kim said.

“Bring it on!” Alix seconded.

Mylene looked up and blindly got a paper from a blue bag, and another from an orange one. “Kim and Alix, you are Majestia and the Moon,” Mylene told them. “And you are on a date!”

Kim and Alix looked at one another. Alix started spinning slowly while walking to the side. Kim ran with his arms extended in front of him and came next to Alix. 

“Hey, pretty,” he told her, “Do you come here often?”

She looked at her wrist, “Every 24hs, yes.”

‘Would you like to hit it off, head somewhere?“ he wiggled his eyebrows.

“I’d love to. But my path is set. I can’t be moved!” she cried out dramatically.

Kim then scooped her up, “There is nothing i can do. I’ll bring you back by eight.”

Alix gestured for Ivan to get closer. “But we’ll mess with the tides!” she kicked a bottle of water off Ivan’s hand.

“You’ve already messed with my heart!” Kim said, and he ran away.

The others clapped and laughed.

“That will be hard to top. Is the next pair ready?” Mylene said.

“Let’s do this!” Alya said, holding Nino’s hand.

Mylene picked another two pieces of paper. “Alya and Nino, you are...”she read, ‘Hawkmoth and Mayura, having an argument.”

“Hawky!” Alya quacked.

“What is it, my love?” Nino replied calmly.

“We need to talk about your problem!” she said, fists to her hips.

“Excuse me?” 

“You need to stop bringing flowers to the house, it looks like a funeral,” she said.

Nino started gesturing as if he was watering plants. “My butterflies need them, and my wife loves them,” he said solemnly.

“I don’t like them!” Alya pressed on, flipping her hair.

Mylene jumped in. “Husband!, she told Nino, “are you ready to play charades?”

“Who is she?!” the two girls said at the time, Nino glanced at one, and the other.

“I can explain it!” she said tentatively.

“I’m done!” Alya said, walking out.

‘Mayura, wait!“ he yelled, running after her.

Mylene had her mouth open in shock. She closed it, looking at the camera, and laughed. "That's an interesting take. Let's give them a round of applause," she said giggling and clapping. “Now it’s the turn of the last pair. Are you ready, Marinette, Adrien?”

Marinette yelped, “Me?!”

Adrien smiled at her, “We’re in this together, c’mon!”

Mylene picked two papers and read, ‘You are Ladybug and Chat Noir, flirting.“

The two teens were struck silent for a hot minute.

Then Marinette squared her shoulders and puffed out her chest, she turned to the boy, raising an eyebrow, and said “I heard you like bad boys. That's good, m’lady, because I'm bad at everything *wink*”, she said the word _wink_ but instead of winking, she closed both eyes slowly.

Adrien sighed, and pushed his hips to one side, “Chat, you are the moron to my moronsexual.”

“Does it mean it worked?”she purred, getting closer.

“It means... I race you to the Eiffel tower!” he cried, doing a somersault over a bench.

“There goes the love of my life,” she sighed, jumping over the bench after him.

Their friends roared in laughter.


	16. The one with too much thought given to akumas and heroics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka watches Marinette and Adrien stream gaming at Max's and something does not sit well on him. He can't go on like this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took me a little longer to post than the average because I had a lot to sort out and wanted to get ir right. I'm happy with how it turned out, but lots of stuff is left implicit, so PLEASE you tell me your thoughts on whatever is going on and who knows what!

Marinette looked at her phone. The blue double tick showed Luka saw her message and knew she wouldn’t make it. But no reply was coming, even though she could see the “typing” label appear and disappear. She was late for joint patrol again, so nothing could be done and she was to leave without knowing how mad her boyfriend was. How much would he put up with before dumping her? Was he devoted enough to let it slip, to disregard his own self-respect so much? If she was in his shoes, would she let it go, being stood up, ranking low in priority, if Adrien...? Luka! 

“Argh!” she growled, slapping her own face, “Get a grip!”

“Is everything OK, Marinette?” Tikki asked, concerned, “are you ready to go?”

“Yes, you?” The girl asked. Her kwami nodded. “Tikki, spots on!”

***

Luka looked at his phone. He wasn’t sure he wanted things to unfold like this. He opened the EHA folder and decided to have a look at the last video, not at all delaying dealing with Marinette’s situation. No, sir. 

_“Greetings!” Max said, “I’m Max Kante, and I’m a 15-year-old student at Francoise Dupont. I’m very happy to be here sharing one of my passions with you all. I’m all about IT, software development, robotics, game development... so I have been creating programmes, AIs and games for a while.”_

_“Hello” Marcov zoomed into the frame. “Nice to meet you all!”_

_“This is my friend Marcov,” Max introduced, “the most advanced AI I’ve created.” “But make no mistake,” he warned, “Marcov is not a toy, but his own person.”_

_“Thanks, Max,” Marcov said, heart-eyed, “you are a good friend.”_

_“In fact, Marcov has his own plans, and stood me up today. He’s not gaming with us.”_

_“Maybe next time?” Marcov said, offering his appendage to Max._

_“Sure, pal,” the boy accepted, fist bumping. “Luckily,” Max said to the camera, “some friends are coming over, and they are going to play the latest patch I developed to help me try and find some bugs.” He looked at his wristwatch. “In the meantime, let me explain what this game is about.”_

_The screen splitted in two, and the game interface appeared on the right. “This is a fight game, inspired in Ultimate Mecha Strike III. The big differences are: (1) this is a 3D game, so characters move in space, and not just up/down, and to the sides. (2) The characters are not mecha, but playable versions of akumas. This might seem controversial, but I think it’s therapeutic to be in charge of one’s akuma form, and use it for fun, and use it for good. You know most people don’t remember about their time under an akuma influence. I hope this helps them regain a sense of control. (3) You don’t collect points by defeating opponents. Instead, you get items that grant you the powers of the akuma, which you can equip and combine with your own. (4) when a character is defeated, it doesn’t die, theír akumatization reverses, and they wish you luck to keep on fighting and defeat Hawkmoth. Sounds fun, right?”_

_At that moment, a doorbell rang. “Those must be my friends... Just in time!” There was a cut to the next scene. Max introduced the two teens sitting next to him._

_“These are my classmates and friends... Marinette,” he said pointing to the dark-haired girl, “with whom we won the UMS III local championship last year... and Adrien,” Max said pointing to the blond boy, “who graciously gave up his place so that i could compete in that championship, even though he had defeated me.”_

_“I just got lucky that day,” Adrien rebutted humbly._

_“That we’ll see today!” Max pushed his glasses up his nose._

_“So, how is it going to be?” Marinette asked._

_“We are playing a round-robin tournament, best of three matches.”_

_“Sounds fun!” Adrien said._

_“There’s one extra rule,” Max declared ominously. The other two looked at him expectantly, and grabbed each other’s hands as if seeking comfort or expecting terrifying news. “The player who’s not taking part in the duel picks the characters the other two are playing.”_

_“You are ruthless!” Marinette gasped, her gleeful tone not quite matching her words._

_“Let the hunger games begin!” Adrien said._

_The other two looked at him quizzically._

_“What?” Adrien said. “Characters who lose get eliminated from the game.”_

_“Rest assured,” Max told the camera, “No characters, fictional or IRL will get hurt, they help work towards the greater good and get nice stock animation.”_

_The other two couldn’t contain their laughter._

_“Let the hunger games begin!” Marinette said with mock seriousness._

_“Now you say it, it’s funny?” Adrien mock-complained._

_“That’s my superpower,” she winked._

_”I thought it was making great macarons,”Adrien shrugged._

_“I’m positive it’s destroying us at UMS III,” Max shuddered._

_“What can I say?” Marinette boasted, ‘I’m a person of many talents.“_

_“So the question is,” Adrien said, scratching his chin, “will the strategy be to give the others powerful akuma, in the hopes that they’ll get out of the way, or will it be to give the other’s the weakest akumas? In which case, the ability to use them strategically will make a difference.”_

_“What would you do,” Max wanted to know, “eh, Marinette?”_

_The girl pondered for a bit before continuing. “Well, I think that, for the purpose of the game, you should consider the character’s melee power, ranged attacks, and other special features that may give it advantage, or can amplify its power. A KO attack, or a game-breaker ability. You could rank them along those terms.”_

_“I see,” Adrien’s face lit up, “for example, Gorizilla, Animan, Gigantitan and Stone Heart are pure melee, so they wreaked havoc IRL, but aren’t as powerful in the game.”_

_“But could be great power ups!” Max added. “You wouldn’t make one of them face a player that controls Puppeteer. Puppeteer herself is a great power-up, because she summons extra playable characters.”_

_“Exactly,” Marinette said, “The same way, you wouldn’t want to make Copycat or Antibug or Volpina face Miraculer. Miraculer is ineffectual but against them, and then she becomes very OP.”_

_“A jack-of-all trades would be a better choice,” Adrien continued, “like Stormy Weather, or Guitar Villain. They fly, they have ranged attacks, they can kick your butt in hand to hand combat, because they are akuma...”_

_“Evillustrator could be a good choice too,” Max said, “because he can create or erase any objects, effectively equipping him well for both melee and long-range.”_

_“But none of these have special features,” Marinette said with the air of a sage. “Consider Vanisher, or Troublemaker. They could neutralise any melee or long range attack very easily, even if they are average melee and cero long-range.”_

_“Yes,” Adrien said, “and Style queen not only evades attacks easily, but also has KO ranged.”_

_“Party crasher is KO melee,” Marinette continued, “like the Collector, but also has game-breaking in the form of movement prediction.”_

_“Desperada is tricky too,” Adrien said ruefully, “because KO ranged attacks with infinite weapons is game breaking in itself.”_

_“If you face that against intangibility, like Style queen or Troublemaker, it depends on the ability of the player,” Max analysed._

_“But whoever won and had the other’s item equipped, would be unbeatable!” Marinette added excitedly._

_“Except,” Adrien snapped, “against a power-nullifier, like Reflekta. She could turn out very handy, even if she has no KO attack herself.”_

_“Other game-breaking feature is teleportation,” Max said, “Lady Wifi couples that with KO ranged, so that’s a very strong character too. That pause button is scary.”_

_“What about time travel?” Marinette pointed out. “Time breaker has KO melee with time travel, and super speed. A reset button coupled with speed and KO melee attacks is very efficient.”_

_“So is Time tagger, who has teleportation and KO ranged attacks,” Adrien lamented._

_“You sure know your akumas!” Max joked._

_The other blushed and mumbled about the Ladyblog and being fans. Max laughed._

_“I say,” the host announced, “we discuss tactics less and play more.” he gave his friends the controllers. “You two start,” he said and chose their characters._

_The first match was then Gorizilla vs Gigantitan._

  
  


It really didn’t help ease any of Luka’s worries, to be honest. The signs were so obvious. They were in plain sight (if you knew what to look for.) The boy sighed and swiped to the messaging app. He pressed recording and started a really hard voice message that should’ve been a conversation.

***

They were finishing their round and it was plain that something was off.

“What’s on your mind, m’lady?” Chat inquired.

“Civilian stuff,” Ladybug said curtly. She couldn’t hold it in for long. “I’m waiting for an important message. Do you think I could get going...?”

“Sure, go ahead,” he replied, hiding deflation under a smile.

“You’re the best!” she kissed his cheek, and dashed without further ado. 

Chat Noir didn’t know what to do with himself. He hadn’t planned on coming home yet, and the idea didn’t sit well with him. As he was doing another tour, he found his leaps leading him towards Tom and Sabine’s. Another late call by Adrien was out of the table. _Maybe Marinette is willing to offer her ol’ friend Chat some yesterday’s pastries and a rematch at UMS III._

As he landed on her balcony, his enhanced hearing caught some words that froze him on the sport.

“It’s now or never,” the girl’s voice quivered.

A familiar male voice came from her phone. 

_“Hey, babe...”_ Luka said. _“I wanted to have this convo with you for some time, face to face, but... You stood me up for our last couple of dates. So, it’s really been building up, and I need to tell you. For the record, I’m not angry you stood me up, yet again. It’s fine. Well, actually it isn’t. It’s not fine. It’s not. But I know where you’re coming from.”_

__

He took a deep breath and continued, _“You are under a lot of stress, you’ve got a lot of responsibilities. And I’m here to support you... I am. I have an idea of what it might be, the thing you can't tell me about... and I don’t wanna dig too deep. I don’t wanna put you in a tight spot. I know better than that. If I’m right, you know I know what it’s like. Do you know I know you know? You know. I know, sorry, it’s getting convoluted. It’s hard to put down in words stuff you CAN’T actually put down in words. I’m awful at this. Sorry. It’s just, I don’t think it’s doing neither of us any good. I mean, us. It’s not working. You talk like checking in with me is another responsibility, another chore. It breaks my heart. I don’t want you to feel guilty, or ashamed like that, saying you’ll try to be a better girlfriend. I know you mean well, and you try to do good by... all of us involved? I thought I was fine doing this, being like, an emotional crutch to you. To hold you tight and ask no questions. You know I love you right? I admire you. I think you are a brave, selfless, beautiful person. I know you shoulder the weight of the world. I hope I’m not laying it too thick. But it’s not really healthy, you know? Having a relationship like this, I mean. Probably the other stuff too, but, it’s not my place to say. And you do so well, even if it’s too much. I’m rambling, sorry. My point is... it weighs on me, and I feel you treat our relationship as a chore, and that’s so off.”_

 _“I think,”_ he gulped, _“that what you need is a good friend. I want to be that. And maybe, when stuff is not so crazy, we can give it a go again? I don’t wanna make you sad, I don’t want you to make me sad. And you know, trying this now is hurting us both. Give it a thought, OK? I love you.”_

The girl started sobbing. The sound knocked him out of his stupor. He rapped gently. Her breath hitched.

“Hello, Princess,” Chat said, “Can you use a hug?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was the waiting worth it, my friends?  
> What does Luka know? Did he make a good call? Can I have some pastries now?


	17. The one in which Marinette and Chat Noir grasp at things in the dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jumble in the wee hours. What self-respecting adrienette multichapter isn't sprinkled with some marichat?

Marinette woke up with a startle, the remnants of a nightmare slipping away, only dread left behind. Her arm was numb, a sensation of pins and needles dragging her further into wakefulness. With her eyes still closed, she assessed her surroundings. She was in fact, on her bed: her back pressed against her cat pillow, her hard mattress underneath... but her head wasn’t on her pillow, but on something harder, and an unusual warmth lied next to her. She shifted to relieve the prickling in her arm and started to sift reality from dream. Did Chat Noir really come to visit...? The cotton shirt under her wandering fingers nagged at her thoughts. Luka? No, not Luka. Luka had said they should take a break, he was not the body cuddling her now. The sleep mask pressed to her face... what..?

Stroking her arm, he mumbled, “You awake? It’s... 4 a.m. so I can stay a bit more, but I need to head home soon, Princess. I haven’t got a cover tonight and I’m supposed to be in my own bed”

“A...? Chat?” she managed, her hand clumsily going for the sleep mask on her face.

He gently grabbed her hand. “I de-transformed, remember?” he said. “The suit was scratching your face and Plagg wanted to hang out.” 

She turned away from him to lay face up, pressing her fingers over her eyes. “I’m sorry, I forgot, I...”

“Don’t worry. I’ll get Plagg and get going.”

“Wait for a bit,” she told him, propping herself up, “I’ll grab some pastries and we can eat something before you go.”

“OK, I’ll transform while you’re down so you can use your eyes when we’re eating. I’ll go to the bathroom now, yes?”

She felt the mattress bounce and go up without the extra weight. When the bathroom door clicked closed, she discarded the mask and made her way downstairs.

She focused on not knocking anything down and not breaking anything as she guided her steps on memory rather than eyesight. Flashes of the previous night came jumbled. Did they really happen like that?

_““Hey, I’m here with you OK,” he had whispered softly, as he held her tight. “It’s OK... or maybe, it’s not? It’s OK if it's not OK...”_

_Marinette was startled enough to stop sobbing. Was he quoting...?_

_Chat Noir delicately wiped her face and plowed on, “What I mean is, I’m your friend, and I’m here, you are not alone. And I’m not letting go of you, at least, until you want me to!”_

_“Wh..? Why... why are you...?” she stammered._

_“I’m sorry... about this,” he said in a hoarse voice. “I overheard and if he has it figured out, I cannot ignore it, nagging at the back of my head.”_

_“You have nothing to apologise about, OK?” she said. “I have my suspicions too, but you didn’t have to tell me...”_

_“But, m’lady,” he said, his face glowing with the most faux-innocent expression, “I didn't tell you anything, and neither did you.”_

Marinette put the electrical kettle on and some tea bags and honey in a flask. She found a cloth bag and put a pack of pastries and some mugs in it. The kettle beeped, and she poured the hot water in the flask, securing the top and bagging it too. Touching the wall to guide her steps back to the room, she continued pondering.

_“Yeah,” Chat Noir had replied, scratching his neck in a very familiar way, “I was hoping you’d offer me some pastries, and a rematch at UMS III. I didn’t mean to intrude... I can go, if you want. Or we can hang out?”_

She couldn’t ignore them either, all the little things lining up. 

She knocked on the trapdoor softly. He promptly opened it, and took the bag she was carrying. He looked inside.

“I made some lemon tea with honey,” she explained. “And there are some yesterday’s pastries, as usual.”

“It beats me how you manage to stay fit with this temptation under your nose all the time,” he whispered as he took the elements out.

“I exercise a lot,” she confided with a smirk. He knew that, right? “But also,” she added, passing him a steaming cup, “When it’s under your nose all the time, you get low-key sick of it. I don’t feel the urge to stuff my face with pastries.”

He munched happily. “I also don’t get it,” he continued, “how come you don’t sell these. They are so good!”

She took a sip gingerly, “They aren’t as fresh.” “We donate yesterday’s pastries, or keep some at home for guests, or ourselves.”

“I’m willing to receive donations anytime,” we wiggled his eyebrows.

“I’ll let you know when we need quality testers” she smiled.

He looked pointedly at his cheese Danish, and bashfully added, ”or batter-bowl-cleaners.“

“Definitely,” she said in mock seriousness, “that’s the most important position!”

They laughed, covering their mouths to muffle the sound..

“Can I count on you?” she asked.

“You can count on me,” he said.

  
  


Later, as she saw him vault towards the Agreste mansion, she presumed--no, she shouldn’t think about it--the kwamis perched themselves on her shoulders.

‘It’s going to be OK, Marinette,” Sass told her. “I’m sure Luka is doing his best to protect your identity.”

“And Chat Noir,” Ziggy added, “made himself available to you in a very clever way.”

“Plagg will tell him what we discussed when they get home,” Mullo said, “and we tell you. Communication can be more fluent like this.”

“Yes,” Tikki seconded, “whenever you hang out as civilians, we can hold meetings. And the two of you don’t need to address it or expose yourselves.”

“Thank you, guys,” the guardian said, “I’m really happy you are willing to take a more active role. I’m sure it will be for the best in the long run.”

“Now go back to bed,” Tikki said, booping Mari’s nose, “you have an hour before you have to wake up, and the extra sleep will do you some good.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you didn't find it too frustrating, short and NOT steamy... I wasn't planing on narrating this bit, but as i said, "What self-respecting adrienette multichapter isn't sprinkled with some marichat?"
> 
> EXTRA:  
> “You too, Brutus?”, Marinette said, outraged.  
> “Now you are quoting Shakespeare,” Chadrien smirked >>> This bit was actually a dream =p
> 
> I did an illustration I'm supper happy about for the last chapter, did you check it out? No? Well, you can check in IG @miraculous.lady.drawing or the hashtag #everydayheroesalliance . I put the Chat lineart as my wallpaper, these levels of self-love are unusual.
> 
> Some #BoundMLBfancomic keeps creeping out in the EHA narrative. I really like the idea I had for that comic. The execution was the best I could do back then, so now some parts I find excruciatingly ugly. You didn't read that either? I invite you to check my IG yet again, because there is continuity af.
> 
> In case you wanted some more physical action in this chapter, let me remind you that these young kids are (1) physically and emotionally exhasted, (2) nursing break-ups with partners they were into, (3) trying very hard to deny they know each other's secret identities.  
> My own love life is as weird as it gets. But this happened to me, so I think it's plausible. As a teen, I've lained in very closed quarters with a person I had a strong mutual attraction, with nothing happening, because both of us knew it was not OK, that the time for us was not now. because we were f****ing tired.
> 
> So bear with me, I have a couple more chapters planned, and my holidays are coming to an end. This is the last curve for EHA.


	18. The one in which Luka's students vandalised a song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don't lyrics put you in a mood?

“Thanks for coming, guys,” Luka told them. “I wanted to start with a true beginner video, and I was having some trouble not skipping stuff. Juleka would whack my head with a magazine from time to time,” he chuckled, “and I was making little progress.”

“Don’t worry, Luka,” Chloe said, “we’re the right people and we’re here to help.”

“Yeah,” Kagami smirked, “we have no clue as to how to play the guitar.”

“We’ll whack you on the face with our ignorance,” Chloe seconded.

They placed three stools on the deck. A camera showed the three of them, another just Luka, and yet another focused solely on Luka’s hands. That one was operated by Juleka, who knew what was necessary to look out for. There were three acoustic guitars lying by, ready for the teacher and his new students. They sat down and the cameras started rolling. 

“Hello, I’m Luka and I want to show you how to play the guitar,” he said. “This is a video for people who never played before, or who are a bit rusty, so we’ll start with the basics. If you already know how to play, this video may not teach you something new, but you stay tuned, because future videos will be more advanced.”

He looked at the girls. “Two friends are here with me today,” he announced. “They don’t know how to play the guitar, and accepted coming here as your avatars,” he said.

“We hope to ask the questions our friends at home would want to ask,” Chloe explained.

“We are guinea pigs,” Kagami pointed out.

“Please, give a round of applause,” Luka laughed, “to Mmes Chloe Bourgeois and Kagami Tsurugi!” Juleka clapped along. “Are you ready?” he asked them. They nodded.

“So,” he instructed, “grab a guitar and place it on your left leg, like that... good. Do you know what the different parts of the instrument are called?”

“It has strings,” Kagami noted.

“Well, this looks like a belly, and then this is like a neck, and a head,” Chloe said.

“Good!” Luka approved, “you got a number of things right!” He smiled. “A guitar normally has six strings, and those are called the neck and the head. The bigger part is the body.”

“Guitar geniuses!” Chloe cheered, fistbumping with Kagami.

“There are tuning pegs in the head. You turn them to tune the strings,” Luka explained. “Your guitars are tuned. But it’s always a good idea to check. The standard tuning is like this,” he continued, “The first string is E... pluck it with your index finger. Yeah.” The students did as instructed. “The second string is B, pluck it with your middle finger... good. The third is G, index. The fourth is D, thumb. Make a circular motion like this...” he showed. “Fifth is A, thumb... and sixth is E, also pluck it with your thumb. Good! Any questions so far?”

“Mmm, you said the first and sixth are E, but they sound different,” Kagami said.

“Good observation! They are E, but the sixth is a lower pitch than the first,” Luka explained. “The musical notes are A, B, C, D, E, F, G (or do, re, mi, fa, sol, la, ti--or rather, la, ti, do re mi fa sol). That makes an octave, but when it finishes, there are more notes, only at a higher pitch,” his fingers walked a chromatic scale as he talked, illustrating this point. “The sixth is two octaves lower than the first.”

“I think I understand,” Chloe nodded.

“So, as you can see,” Luka plowed on, “the neck is divided by the frets into sections, and each corresponds with a note. The further from the head, and closer to the body, the higher the pitch.” He made a slide.

“Fingers on your left hand are numbered,” he said, “1, 2, 3 and 4,” putting up his index, middle, ring and pinky respectively. 

“What about the thumb?” Cloe asked.

“Well, it’s behind the neck, and you don’t press the strings with it, so it’s not numbered.”

“I’ll call it five,”Chloe said.

“Say no to discrimination,” Kagami seconded solemnly.

Luka chuckled. “Try walking the strings like this... erm, first only press with your left hand, no plucking. Starting from the sixth string, press with finger one the first fret, finger two fret two, finger three fret three, finger four fret four... and then do the same on string 5, and go down like that.” 

He admired his students' endeavours appreciatively. “Good, now we pluck them also. As if your right hand fingers are walking... index, middle, index, middle... good.”

“It’s nice to explore the basic concepts of the instrument...” Kagami started.

“But I thought we were learning a song!” Chloe completed the complaint.

“That’s right,” Luka agreed, “are you ready?”

“C’mon, we're guitar geniuses!” Chloe bragged.

“I selected a very simple song,” Luka said, “that has only got 3 chords in first position.” He looked at them pointedly, “A chord,” he elaborated, “is when you play a number of notes together. They produce harmony.”

“I can sense a problem,” Kagami said. “There are six strings, and only four fingers. How do you press all of them?”

“Good question again!” Luka beamed, “for these chords, we use some open strings, that is, you don’t press them. In these chords in particular, you only press three strings.”

“OK, what’s the song? And how do you make the chords?” Chloe snapped, never too good at being patient.

“The chords are,” he says as he strummed them, “Dm, G, C... Do you know what song it is?”

Kagami scratched his chin. Chloe chimed, ‘Oh, I know! You played it the other day...! It’s... ah... I’ve got it on the tip of my tongue!“

“It’s a Maroon 5 song, right?” Kagami asked.

“It is! Good ear!” Luka congratulated her. “It’s  _ Sunday Morning _ .”

“That’s what I was about to say!” Chloe said, turning red.

Luka explained how to form the chords.

“Why are you pointing up?” Kagami wanted to know.

“Because I want to add the chord diagrams here post-ed,” Luka told her.

“Musical pieces are divided in bars. The general rule is all bars last the same. That’s true for this song.”

“So we need to strum each chord once?” Chloe asked, “I don’t think I can switch that fast.”

“Actually,” Luka explained, “there’s half a bar of Dm, half a bar of G and a full bar of C. Or rather, you strum Dm twice, G twice, and C four times.” he demonstrated. “More advanced players can do an arpeggio like this,” he showed, “or try a more complex rhythmical pattern for either strumming or arpeggio like this...”

“ _ Sunday morning rain is falling... _ ” Kagami hummed.

“ _ Steal some lovers, fear something, _ ” Chloe sang.

“Those are not the right lyrics,” Luka chuckled, “you know?”

“Don’t steal my thunder, Couffaine,” the socialite scolded. “Keep on playing.”

The two students continued singing, “ _ lalalala, lalalala unforgettable, lalala, lalalala I am in _ ”. Chloe searched for the lyrics in her phone and got closer to Kagami so she could read them too.

_ “But things just get so crazy / Living life gets hard to do / And I would gladly hit the road, get up and go if I knew / That someday it would lead me back to you / That someday it would lead me back to you / That may be all I need / In darkness she is all I see / Come and rest your bones with me / Driving slow on Sunday morning / Well I never want to leave. _ ”

“This is great,” Luka said, “as you can see, the vocal line changes from the verse, to the bridge to the chorus, but the harmonic base we play in the guitar stays the same. Which makes this a very cool song for beginners.” He addressed his assistant-students again. “So, are you ready to have a go at it?”

“This is ridiculous, it takes too much time to go from one chord to the next,” Chloe complained.

“That’s only natural, you need to build muscle memory, and it becomes easier with time.”

“I’ll do the Dm chord,” Kagami suggested, “you do G, Chloe... and I change to C in the meantime. Then you do Dm, and so on.”

“Deal!” the blonde said, a determined grin across her face.

Luka laughed. “You know that’s not how it's done, right?”

“You zip it and watch this!” Chloe said, as she strummed the chord, tongue poking out.

***

Adrien’s mind wandered, filled with dark glossy hair and almond eyes. The song his friends played had been stuck in his head for a while now. He decided to text her. Anything goes. 

“In love and war all is fair, right?” he asked Plagg.

“What are you trying to get hyped to do, kid?” the kwami shot at him.

Adrien just stared at him. The kwami sighed.

“ _ Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once. Who could refrain that had a heart to love and in that heart courage to make love known? The coward dies a thousand deaths, the valiant, only once! _ ”

“Shakespeare?” the boy raised an eyebrow.

“Shakespeare,” the kwami confirmed. “Shall I dumb it down?” he zoomed about. “The early bird gets the worm! The price is for the go-getter, so go get her!”

“All right, it’s sent!‘ Adrien quivered.

“Lemme see what dumbasery you wrote!” Plagg dived, full of mirth.

“You just want to laugh at my expense!” Adrien huffed.

On her side of the line, the recipient yiped. She re-read the message in disbelief.

“ _ You are indebted to me, are you planning on repaying? _ ” She knit her brows. “What... is that... supposed... to... mean?” she wrote in reply.

The typing label flashed in and out. Then a message came through.

**Adrien** : Well, you owe me a kiss.

She choked. Was there something she had forgotten? She had no idea what he was talking about. “Explain... yourself,” she replied.

**Adrien** : I think my then-girlfriend gave you a kiss, you should give it back to me.

Marinette huffed.

**Marinette** : That’s your most convoluted pickup line so far, go take a nap, you addle-brained dork!!!

**Adrien** : Wanna join me? ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Marinette** : Stop pushing your luck! Don’t bribe my sleep-deprived soul!

He sighed, and started typing.

**Adrien** : In all seriousness, don’t you crave for a quieter time, when we can just nap in bed, and be lazy, and just lay there listening to rain fall.

It was his turn to watch the typing label flashed in and out.

**Marinette** : That’s the most feline thing you’ve said ever. But I feel you. ≧◠ᴥ◠≦

**Marinette** : I can only see one problem in your proposals.

**Adrien** : ????

**Marinette** : it’s not rainy ¯\\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯

**Adrien** : (╯ ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)╯┻━┻

Their chat devolved in an emoji war after that. 

“Why are you grinning so big?” Plagg asked. “Did that messed-up line work?”

“I don’t know,” Adrien smiled. “But I think we’re making some progress.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know what I've said about shipping, but are you team lukloe, lukagami, clogami or maybe lukloegami(?) ?? For research purposes (may it swerve the narrative? yes, so vote!) I personally like the dynamic of the three of them together: the absent-minded easy-going working-class lad, the spoiled insecure brat in recovery, the stressed out prodigy queer-disaster with a calm exterior. They are a gold mine for wacky humour.  
> Also  
> I like adrienette coming together as allies, and equals, supporting each other because they KNOW, other stuff unfloding slowly, naturally after that (and yet each of them with over-the top crushes they need to keep at bay, never succeeding).   
> Thanks for reading!


	19. The one with celebrity crushes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari and Adrien pool their resources and take multiple breaks. Questions are addressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have loads of adrienette and ladynoir!

“Did you know that superhero is a strategy to tackle job interviews?” Alya asked exasperated.

“Nop. No way to know that,” Nino replied patting her shoulder, “no job here.”

“Well, I part-time at the bakery, but I didn’t exactly apply for the position,” Marinete chirped.

“Same here. Only I wish I was at a _bakery_ and not _toasting_ under the spotlights,” Adrien lamented.

Marinette laughed, “That’s a nice pun there.”

“Piece of cake,” he finger gunned in her direction.

“I have a real problem here, guys!” Alya interrupted them. “The questions I’ve polled are impossible to ask. I’m running out of ideas, and Google seems to be trolling me!”

“No useful search results?” Nino nudged.

“No! I cannot ask LB and CN _How do you get customers to talk about their business priorities?,_ ” Alya growled, fisting locks of her own hair.

Nino rubbed her back. “What would you like to know about them?”

“Lot’s of things! But most of them are not stuff I can actually ask!” she complained. “Safe AND interesting questions are hard to come by! Do you remember that time Nadja Chamack interviewed them?”

“And LB got mad and ran off...?” Adrien asked.

“...And Nadja got akumatized?” Marinette continued. The thought sent shivers down both their spines.

“Yeap... We’d like to avoid that,” Nino nodded sagely. “OK, a different approach: What can’t you ask them?”

“Their identities, of course,” Alya snapped, “or anything that could expose them.”

“Also,” Marinette added, ‘You don’t wanna ask anything strategic that could be useful to Hawkmoth.“

“Like _What are your weaknesses and strengths?_ ” Adrien pointed out.

“Or even subtler stuff,” Nino said, “like stuff connected to fighting Hawkmoth. Strategy or motivation, or feelings, anything he could turn against ’em.”

“Hey,” Marinette said as she flashed her phone and started typing, “Maybe you can google interview questions for celebrities, and try some of those.”

“Sure,” Alya huffed, “but they are not artists, or celebrities, wouldn’t it be too bland? Plus, I cannot really poke around their personal stuff.”

“What about you ask them some general questions about how they came to occupy that position, and how they handle it,” Adrien said.

“ Look at these...!” Marinette read before she shared the link, “ _Do you sing in the shower? Who would you like to collaborate with?”_

“I’m sure,” Nino said, “that if anyone has anything to say about managing challenging situations and feelings it’s them.”

“OK, OK,” Alya grinned all of a sudden, as if struck by the eureka bolt of inspiration. “I think I have a battle plan!”

***

Marinette and Adrien were casually hanging out in her bedroom, as they had taken the habit to do. They had been skipping the otherwise mandatory plate of yesterday’s pastries for a while now in favor of the bowl of fruit that was sitting on the desk, as they took a study break to play another round of UMS III.

“I guess I can understand now,” Adrien said wistfully, ”what you meant by getting low-key tired of pastries.”

“I thought it had been your dietician's recommendation to avoid them,” Marinette observed. Wait... Who did she have that conversation with...? She was losing track fast of what was said on what side of the mask. 

“Sure,” he acknowledged, “but the longer I hang out here, the further back my brain they are pushed.”

‘Oh,“ she said as she landed a killer combo, “I’m sorry. My sustained presence in your life has robbed you of the joy of pastries!”

“I’d never regret spending time with you, tough,” he said simply, putting down the controller in acceptance of his landslide defeat.

They breezed through the assigned Math exercises as fast as they could. They had found they could get a lot more things done when each of them only did half the exercises and they pooled together their work.

“D’you think this might hurt us in the long run?” Marinette said, looking intently at the shared cloud file where she was completing a History question.

“You mean like, skipping school work stuff you should need later in your career?”

She nodded.

“Well, we mostly discuss all stuff together, so it’s not like we have zero clue. And we’re not slacking work. If anything, we’re doing lots of work and trying to be smarter about it.”

“I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever be able to pursue a career at all...” she sighed.

 _"Come what come may, time and the hour runs through the roughest day,_ " Adrien recited.

“You cannot just break into depressing Shakespearean monologues like that,” she quipped.

He scratched his neck. “This will pass too,” he said simply, “the only thing we can do is try our best.” He patted her shoulder lightly.

She picked a sticky note, “I have one for you.” She smiled and read aloud, _“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt."_

He beamed, “It’s rubbing into you!”

“I don’t go into battle unequipped,” she said in mock seriousness.

They decided to watch the Rose testimony as they took another break. Marinette was laying on the floor, her legs up and propped against the wall, her arms sprawled. He laid down by her side, holding his phone up.

“Oh,” she stammered, “you don’t... no need to... eh...”

“It’s fine,” he said. “Here, hold it.”

_Rose was sitting cross legged on the Liberty’s deck, hugging the most colourful unicorn plushie. She fixed a smile, took a deep breath and started, “Hello, friends! I’m Rose Lavillant. I’m a 16-year old student at Francoise Dupont. I’m currently, the student who was akumatized the most often at the school.” A shiver went down her spine. “The beautiful Mme Juleka Couffaine is here with me today, as well as the handsome and talented Mm Luka Couffaine and Nath Klutzberg. Thank you, guys!” she smiled fondly at them. She looked at the camera and plowed on, “It’s a record I’m not proud of.”_

_“You are a very sensitive person,” Nath said. “You feel strongly and that’s awesome. That’s something I wouldn’t change in you!”_

_“I agree,” Luka seconded, “you have the amazing quality of empathy, and Hawkmoth’s tendency to smear feelings with his...” he waved his hand, “... mysterious intent? ... it should never rob you of that.”_

_“Never change, Rose,” Juleka said softly, squishing her hand in hers._

_“Thank you, guys!” the petite girl quivered. “I’m trying to learn not to let feelings overwhelm me, and look at them with compassion and a quieter mind. I’m forever thankful Mme Bustier introduced us to meditation. It makes me very happy that we’re trying to take these tools to other people who may need them.”_

_“So,” Luka offered, “do you want to tell us how you first become akumatized?”_

_“I watched a lot of footage of this case,” Nath said, “for our work on ‘Adventures of Go Girl and Bananaman’, but I never understood how a lot of stuff came about.”_

_Rose shot a tiny smile at Juleka, who nodded._

_“I guess it all started because I admire Prince Ali a lot, and was really worked up about meeting him.” Rose explained, “I couldn’t focus on schoolwork, because I was trying to watch the news, I got a letter I wanted to send him confiscated...”_

_“Yeah,” Nath nodded reminiscent, “our Chemistry teacher is rather... harsh, and she sent you to the principal’s office.”_

_“Yeah, and my hopes of giving him the letter,” Rose said, ‘got literally shredded.“_

_“And then, you became akumatized, right?” Luka asked._

_“That’s right,” she confirmed. “As other people said, it turned out right for me, and I actually met Prince Ali face to face.”_

_“He’s really kind,” Juleka said._

_“I hope I’m not a disappointment to him,” Rose lamented, “You know, since I’ve been re-akumatized four times since then. I’m sorry Ladybug and Chat Noir! I’m sorry people of Paris!”_

_“Do you want to tell our friends and patrons about the meditation work you mentioned earlier?” Nath asked._

_“Sure!” Rose beamed. “I think,” she said, “the key concept is that we are not essentially in any way. Our mind and thoughts are not fixed objects, but, like, works in progress. You can take some distance and look at them with compassion, and gradually change them, and let go of judging or repeated narratives that carve grooves in your mind. Also, when you allow any thought or feeling to override your whole person, chances are you’ll hurt yourself or other people, (and that’s not even considering the Mothman.) It’s helped me a lot, I hope it helps me stay away from akumas at least.”_

_“I think it’s paying off already, Rose,” Luka said. “You did brilliantly at helping our friend during the live stream.”_

_They all hummed in ascent._

_“Thanks, Luka,” Rose blushed._

_“Those breathing exercises are meditation techniques, right, Rose?” Juleka offered._

_“They are!” she confirmed, “there’s a neuroscientific base to it, too.... You brain controls your breathing pattern according to levels of stress, but also” she raised her index finger, “ it works the other way around,your breathing pattern conditions your fight or flight response. It’s really interesting.”_

_“I think another factor is,” Luka said, “that sometimes a person gets really caught up in their thoughts, as you said. And sometimes an interruption is enough to help them break free from that cycle.”_

_“That’s true,” Nath said._

_“It makes me really happy that one of the receipts for EHA’s funds is the mindfulness research centre,” Rose said. “They’ve wanted to offer free meditation courses to our community for a long time. I’m happy to announce we are working with them to launch that project soon, as we are helping them buy some necessary elements and secure a venue. Our patrons and also all akuma victims will have priority when they apply for a position, but anyone can apply!”_

_“I hope this reaches all people who may benefit from it!” Nath said._

_“So, Rose,” Luka said, “have you got any closing comments for people at home?”_

_“Well, I guess my story is a lot like other akuma victims’. I wanted something really badly, and my frustration at how it played out... got the better of me. Try to cultivate patience and kindness. Doing your best doesn’t mean you’ll get what you want because like is not fair like that. But doing your best and keeping an open, kind mindset will help ensure things play out as well as possible.” She breathed in and out. Then looked at the camera again and said her goodbyes, “Thanks for watching, stay safe, and stay strong!”_

“Hey,” Adrien said, turning his face to her, “hypothetically, if you were Chat, how would you answer Alya’s questions?”

She was momentarily distracted by just how close their noses were. “I don’t know, how would you answer them?”

“Mmm...” he said, licking kis lips, “Shall we try a mock interview...? You know... for the fun of it?‘ He propped himself up and offered his hand to her.

“Sure,” she said, as she grabbed her hand and sat up.

***

They sat down in the surprisingly comfortable couches of the ‘secret location’. Alya was donning a professional looking suit, and Nino looked his usual self behind the camera. For obvious reasons, they hadn’t gone live this time. Chat was laying back, arms along the length of the back of the couch. Ladybug sat prim and blinked a lot.

“Hello, everyone, and thanks for watching EHA’s exclusive Q&A with Ladybug or Chat Noir!” she clapped, and the heroes joined in.

“Thanks for having us, Alya!” Chat replied exuding nonchalance.

“And congratulations to all the EHA team on the amazing job they’ve been doing these last weeks,” Ladybug said, trying to project poise.

“Thank you, guys! It’s really generous of you to make time for us!,” the reported beamed.

“We do our best,” the heroine replied.

“I have this plush, and If you hold it you can answer the question, or if you’d rather refuse, you toss it back to me, OK?” she said, showing the toy.

“Oh! It’s a cutie,” LB said, extending her arms towards it. 

“You’ll trick her into answering,” Chat chuckled affectionately.

“I was hoping for that,” Alya replied, faux-shocked, as she gave the plushie to Ladybug. “So, my first question is... What did you do when you were first entrusted with superhero powers?” 

Ladybug gave the toy to her partner.

“Well, I was super excited, and didn’t listen to the instructions,” he said. “That brought a lot of problems along the way, but luckily, I have a trusty partner,” he said, giving the plushie back to her.

“Well, I got very scared, and my... guide... had a hard time getting across. So I got the whole info, I guess. Yay!,” she confided.

Alya chuckled.

“I have to confess I wanted to quit a couple of times at first, because I felt it was a huge responsibility I wasn’t ready to shoulder,” the heroine continued. “But then I realised there was no one else, and I was needed. So I put on my big girl pants...”

“... or miraculous?” Chat interjected.

She smirked. “Practice makes perfect? I guess you cannot wait to be ready to do stuff, because that’s just not how most things work,” she shrugged.

“Chat recited, _“Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em.”_

“Is that a Harry Potter quote?” Alya asked.

“Don’t mind him,” LB said, giving her back the plushie. “He has a tendency to recite like that.”

“OK, next question,” the reporter said, “What do you like doing in your spare time?”

Both heroes laughed. 

“Spare time?” Chat said. “Have you got some?”

“Never heard of it, sorry!” she replied. 

“My bad,” Alya said, “I suppose heroics is not a registered job, so you probs have a day job as well, right? How do you handle civilian and hero responsibilities?”

Chat extended his hand to grab the plushie. “It’s a juggling exercise, I’d say.” he threw the toy to his partner.

“I’m sorry to say I tell the people around me some very convoluted lies sometimes, in order to get away and stop an attack. Sorry, my people.”

“You do it for their sake and safety,” Alya said. “I hope they don’t hold it against you.”

“Me too,” LB sighed, tossing the plushie back to her.

“On a lighter note, who is your celebrity crush?” Alya asked, giving it back to her.

She went as red as her suit as she said, “Adrien Agreste.” She waved awkwardly at the camera, “Hi, Adrien! You are beautiful inside and outside! I love your work in EHA and your piano covers!”

“We’ll pass the message!” Alya smiled. “What about you, Chat?”

He simply took the plushie and wiggled his eyebrows at Ladybug.

“Aw, c’mon you, dork!” she complained, punching his shoulder and grabbing the plushie.

He simply laughed heartily. She gave the toy to Alya, a plea in her eyes.

“OK, so tell us....How would someone get your special attention?”she asked.

“Get akumatized,” Chat shot, teary-eyed.

“Or better still,” Ladybug retorted, “don’t!”

“Would you date a fan?” Alya wanted to know.

“Sure,” he said, “what’s the alternative, someone who hates our guts? A psycho who admires Hawkmoth?” 

“It would be weird though,” LB hummed pensively, “they’d gush about your superhero persona, and you had to agree? Or feign indifference? Weird.”

“Are you different in and out of suit?”

The superheroes looked at one another.

“I’m not sure we can answer that...” she said.

“I’ve got it,” he caught the plush toy. “Everyone projects a certain persona when doing tasks, such as doctors, or teachers, flight attendants... We’re the same, I’m sure.”

“I have a question from one of our patrons here,” Alya said, “Who is your inspiration?”

Chat passed the stuffed animal to his lady. “I sometimes remember Majestia’s quotes to get hyped, but actually,” she said, “it’s normal people, doing their best at everyday life (and supernatural trouble) that inspire me to give my best and get going.”

“Nice one,” he smiled. She smiled back and gave Alya the toy.

“What’s the most interesting thing you’ve read or seen this week?” Alya asked, tossing the item in their direction.

“I read,” he said, “EHA is funding an NGO that supports immigrant children through their schooling, and make sure they have access to menstrual hygiene management. That’s so uplifting! It dignifies, and gives prospects of the future to these families. I’m really proud patrons pointed to and decided to support this cause.”

“Oh!” The heroine said, “I read another NGO that will be heavily funded is the one that gives legal support and shelter to victims of domestic violence. Thet's great!”

“Thanks! We all hope to do our best and keep up the good work. It’s an honour to be able to lend a hand to this brave, kind people. Next question? What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever done for you?” 

They tossed the plush toy back at her. 

“OK, what about... What pet would you love to have?”

“A hamster!” the heroes replied in unison.

“Great minds think alike, right?” he said. They fist bumped. 

“Here I have a question by an EHA member... What would be a good theme song for your life?”

“Miraculous, by Clara Nightingale?” Chat replied.

“I think it could sound a lot like Bjork’s _it’s oh so quiet_. You know...” she said.

“Like, full of ups and downs...” he completed.

“Yeah, that!” she smiled at him.

“What are some things that sound like compliments but are actually insults?”

“Well, whenever someone says ‘you’re so... to be, you know’...” Ladybug waved her hands.

“A girl... so young... POC, etcetera. Also, stuff along the lines of ‘you don’t look autistic at all!’ I want to smack people when I hear that...” he supplied

“Oh, what about... ‘you’re too pretty/handsome to be gay/non-binary/trans’, and the like...?”

“Yeah, sorry to tell you pals, you’re being a condescending bigot,” Chat said looking at the camera.

“If you mean well, inform yourself well,” Ladybug concluded.

“You said earlier that you were entrusted with your hero responsibilities. What do you think is the deal with Hawkmoth?” Alya asked.

“Well,” Chat started tentatively, “you know he’s always demanding we hand him our miraculous. These are items that grant us our powers. There’s a bunch of them.”

“The one Hawkmoth is using, or rather, abusing or misusing, is the butterfly miraculous. It had gone missing, along with the peacock, the one Mayura wields. When... they sensed these miraculous were activated, and with a negative energy... the miraculous guardian decided to activate ours, to contain the threat and try to retrieve the missing items,” Ladybug explained.

“I hope one day we can use them for good purposes, and they bring peace and trust to the people,” Chat said.

“As for what he seeks to accomplish,” she continued, “we have no idea. What whatever it is,” she said, looking at the camera, “it’s not worth it.”

“Ladybug is right,” Chat continued. “The price to pay is too high. And no matter what high end he thinks he’s trying to achieve... if his means are terrorising people, it’s... not OK.”

‘Totally,“ Alya nodded, “that’s handbook anti-villain.”

“I mean,” Chat said, “he could be just an ax-crazy psycho. But we hope he can see the error in his ways and find other means to achieve his ends.”

“He’s profoundly ignorant of the miraculous lore. He can always choose to contact... the right people... and seek help, and hope to atone,” the heroine sighed.

“On this note,” Alya asked, “who would you like to collaborate with?”

“Well,” Chat said, grabbing the plushie, “you know our team has been... disbanded, because, although they have not been disclosed to the general public, Hawkmoth uncovered the identities of our usual collaborators.”

“We cannot say anything about this really, but we hope we can expand our team soon,” Ladybug said, shooting an apologetic smile to Alya.

Alya sighed, “I’m sure they understand, LB. Next question,” she pressed, “Have you ever dealt with performance anxiety?”

“Well,” she replied, “I told you of my shaky first heroics...”

“Sometimes,” Chat said, prying the plushie softly from her hands, “it can be overwhelming to have to shoulder so much responsibility. But we have each other’s backs.” He planted a soft kiss on her knuckles.

She covered her face with her hands, ”You see what I have to deal with?”

They all laughed. “But in all seriousness,” he added, ‘we have a solid partnership, and that’s something I’m immensely thankful for.’

“When do you plan to retire?” Alya shot.

They looked at one another.

He said finally, “We are strongly committed to protect people from Hawkmoth and make sure the miraculous are used for good. That’s a promise with no expiration date.”

“Can you talk a little about superhero fashion?” Alya asked. “Did you decide on your costumes? It has been noticed that they looked different when you swapped.”

“Well,” Ladybug replied. “of course they are magic... they reflect the person wearing them. Different people look different wielding the same miraculous, though they keep the same theme and the colour palette. But it’s subconscious, so I don’t think we can influence it on purpose.” 

“One last question, what is one message you would give to your fans?”

“Thank you,” Chat said simply. “We cannot always stay to answer questions, or take photos, but we really appreciate you.”

“Your support is of key importance,” the heroine stressed. “If you keep a steady heart, and work to do what you can from your position, with kindness and compassion, you’re at the forefront of the war on Hawkmoth.”

“Stay safe, and stay strong,” Chat said, “and then we’ll have won half the battle.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been summoned back to work (I'm not unemployed, yay!) So I'm finding it harder to make time for EHA. only a couple more of chapters are due, though. So thank you for reading, commenting and supporting. This fic has taken off far beyond what I had ever expected, and it fills me with warm feelings. ILY 
> 
> EDIT post added illustration: As you can see, Alya managed to keep her shipping subtle... but, will everyone else manage it too?


	20. The one when everyone gets a miraculous for real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> EHA's immense success is celebrated, and Marinette goes as red as her suit.

It had been a number of things really. None of them alone explained it on itself. The combined followings of _Adventures of Ladybug and Chat Noir,_ Chloe, Kitty Section, Aurore Boreal and Adrien gave them traction. The #complimentchallenge had gone viral. The shipping wars had their own subreddit and long Twitter threads, even if Alya had effectively shut them down for good in the Patreon. Kimalix had been a nightmare, but when the adrigami debacle cleared, everyone got behind adrienette. All eyes were on EHA since the sadmelon incident. And then Max’s game was so high on demand that he actually got contacted by indie games platforms that wanted to feature it. The exclusive interview with the heroes of Paris had been huge, of course. But it had been gaining momentum long before it.

EHA found that, with their first pay-check around the corner, they had garnered more than 25,000 patrons, and though most of them were very low tier, some black swans tipped the scales significantly, and they had...

“More than half a million euros...?” Alya gasped. Even as Max repeated the calculations and numbers to them in the inner circle/MHA meeting, it was hard to wrap their heads around it. 

It was decided that they should get an accountant and a lawyer to make sure that the monetary dealings were going to be clear and legal. It was a lot of money.

“Will we become our own NGO?” Nino pondered, “It’s wild!”

Another important decision taken that day was to do something special to thank all their supporters. It had seemed a good idea back then. 

***

Fast forward. Somehow, they had ended up deciding to reshoot the videoclip for Clara Nightingale’s _Miraculous_. She was a big patron. Chat Noir had mentioned it in the interview. When she fantasised about it in her IG live stream, her following had gone wild and started a petition even before the stream ended. Different EHA members starring as the heroes of Paris... she even had the costumes Gabriel had designed...! It didn’t hurt that a similar idea had been floating around in Sabrina’s cosplaying nook of the Patreon. Gabriel himself was a huge patron, In spite of what Adrien had hoped against hope, he jumped on board, and started working on the other suits as well! Who had decided top tier patrons would vote who would play who...?

It was an unspoken agreement among the MHA inner circle that any casting choice too close to reality would be banned. Chloe asked to be banned from appearing as a hero altogether.

“We’ll have to rig it,” Kagami had said. 

“I’ll start coding it asap. Marcov?” Max said, opening his laptop.

“I’m on it,” his friend said, plugging in.

“Thanks, pal.”

They discussed whether the ban encompassed adrienette as well. They had various justifications, though none was discussed explicitly. Luka seemed set on it, but everyone attributed it to his recently failed relationship.

Which is why Marinette had been on the verge of tears when the cast had been revealed. Playing Ladybug was a very real possibility. And she found herself today getting her make-up done and getting ready for a promotional photoshoot, her stomach churning.

“Yo, Marinette!” Alya called as she trotted her way. “How do I look?”

“Stunning, as always!” Marinette appraised her best friend. “Did they do your make-up?”

Alya took off the helmet. “They did, in fact. But it’s very natural looking.”

“You’ll make a fantastic Go Girl!”

“You look great too. Red is your colour.”

“Ha ha... thanks...!” Marinette tensed. “Did you see Adrien?”

“Did you call my name?” Adrien said, as he came their way alongside Bananaman, both in full costume already.

“Wayhem, my partner!” Alya said, “Are you ready to fight some evil?”

They high-fived.

“I’m always ready!” His face was not visible, but it was clear he had a face-splitting grin. “I’m so happy I was given a role at the end! I’m standing in for Bananaman, isn’t that awesome!”

Adrien’s mouth twisted in an amused smile, “Congratulations, man!”

“We have to get going,” he told Alya, “our shoot is due in 5.”

“See you later, girlie,” she blew a kiss to Marinette and put on the helmet again.

“We still have some time,” Adrien told her, “shall we go get some snacks?”

She nodded faintly, took a deep breath and followed him.

Mylene and Ivan were sitting on a quiet corner doing breathing exercises, wearing their costumes but their make-up not yet done.

“Apparently,” Adrien told her, “in Twitter their casting was considered a major triumph.”

“Hmm?” Marinette managed.

“Well, Myvan is an established couple,” he said, “and it looks like there are a lot of Roi Singe/Pegasus shippers.”

Marinette laughed, “How do you know that?” Then she stared at him with as much mock seriousness as she could muster. “Do you read those reddits?”

He just looked ahead and scratched his neck.

“Adrien, you follow the shipping wars! OMG,” she laughed.

“ _Upon my tongue continual slanders ride, the which in every language I pronounce, stuffing the ears of man with false reports_.”

“You... cannot... Shakespeare your way... out of this!” she said, laughter redoubled.

“If you find it so funny,” he retorted, “then I’m not telling you any more shipping gossip!”

“No, Adrien, (hiccup) please,” she puppy-eyed at him, “tell me more (hiccup) gossip.”

His glare softened and he looked around. “You see Sabrina, over there?” he pointed.

Marinette spotted the ginger sporting a white and blue suit, with big fluffy ears and twirling a parasol.

“She ended up casted as Bunnix, but she was the runner-up for the Ladybug position.”

“Was she?” the girl wondered.

“Yeah, apparently, bug!Sabrina x Wayhem is a fast growing tag in fanfiction.”

“You read fanfics!” she pointed an accusatory finger at him (and hiccuped.)

He raised an eyebrow.

“Sorry,” she said meekly, “tell me more. Share your deep web wisdom with me.”

“Also, apparently,” he continued, “after Sabrina’s first live, something called snake!Kagami nation started existing, which is why she won the position by landslide. There’s a lot of art on Tumblr. They are hoping that her look in the video won’t disappoint them.”

“Want some soft drink?” she offered him, eyeing the table with snacks.

“Water?” he surveyed.

“Water,” she confirmed, pouring two glasses.

Another hero approached the table.

‘Hi, guys,“ said Aurore.

“Hi!” they greeted.

“I love how yellow looks on you!” Marinette said.

“You think so?” she replied, looking at

“Sure,” Adrien reassured her, “You’ll be a great Queen Bee!”

“Thanks,” Aurore smiled. She finished her cup of coffee and strutted with determination towards the set.

“I think she still has mixed feelings about Chloe,” Adrien whispered to his red-clad companion.

“I still have mixed feelings about Chloe,” she confided, “How come she escaped this torture?”

“I think she’s going to be healthcare personnel,” Adrien recalled. “She was pestering the staff about the colour of her scrubs.”

“Look there’s some fresh fruit!” Marinette pointed out. “Want some?”

As they munched on the healthy snacks, two gingers came strolling their way.

“Yo, Adrien,” Alix called as she approached, her big red wig and ears bouncing, “are you ready to pull some acrobatics with me?”

“I’m no Kim,” Adrien said, “but bring it on!”

She fist bumped with him. “We’re gonna rock the fox/turtle pair!” she declared, and turned to do a cartwheel. Her wig didn’t complete the motion with her.

“Oops...” she scooped it. “See you later!”

And away she dashed.

“Hey,” Nathaniel turned to the other two. “Have you seen Juleka?”

“Not yet” Martinette answered. “What’s the matter?”

“I want to apologise,” the boy lamented. “None of this would’ve happened if I hadn’t drawn the fanart!”

“What do you mean?” Adrien asked.

“I started the bug!Rose x cat!Jules trend,” the ginger said, covering his face, “and now they have to act it out in a video clip!”

“I’m sure they are not mad at you,” Marinette reassured him.

“You are a great Ryuko, by the way,” the ginger told her.

“Thanks.”

“Why don’t we all go to the set?” Adrien suggested, “I’m sure you’ll find Juleka there, Nath!”

“Alright!” he nodded.

Marinette sighed.

“It’s gonna be fine,” Adrien whispered to her, grabbing her hand and leading her into the set.

***

It was not fine. It was as if God was a love square shipper and he but a puppet of fate. As fixing Alix’s wig took longer than expected, he ended up paired with Ryuko for the longest time, play-fighting, dancing, holding hands, scooping her up bridal style on a few occasions...

 _Lean in closer_ , the photographer would say.

 _Look at each other in the eyes,_ the director would indicate.

 _Are the lights too much? They are both very red in the face!_ The producer complained.

And it didn’t get any better after they dressed like civilians for the takes in which they played essential workers. He could’ve died for real when she pressed her hands to his chest, mimicking CPR. There’s only so much a Physics teacher’s heart can take.

“Don’t get disheartened,” she had told him, “it’s going to be over soon.”

“Don't tell me not to get disheartened when my heart’s in your clutch,” he had rebutted.

She had spluttered so bad that she actually spat him, and had to stand up and leave. She was mortified. He almost regretted it.

Obviously, when later that night he transformed and decided to catch some fresh air, she was there too. _They shared one brain cell and spent all their time together, of course she would’ve had the same idea,_ he lamented. The plopped down on a ledge of Sacre Cour.

“Sorry about today,” she told him. “I was a bundle of nerves and made everything awkward.”

“You’ve got nothing to apologise for,” he told her. “Was it because of the dragon miraculous?”

“Partly,‘ she confessed. 

“I was kinda nervous too,” he confessed.

“The model, nervous at a shoot?” she shot quizzically. “I thought they were second nature to you.”

“Yeah, sure,” he said.

They remained in silence for a while.

“You know I mean it all,” he pressed on. “I don’t want to make things awkward between us.” He drew breath and looked her in the eye, “but I really do like you a lot.”

“I like you a lot too,” she said with a small voice.

He beamed. “Why aren’t we dating again?” he said triumphantly. He hadn’t expected her ragged breath. “Oh, sorry..” he facepalmed, “I just said I wouldn’t make things awkward... Can you use a hug?”

She drapped her arms around him. It took some time, him caressing her hair, before she elaborated.

“Remember when I told you Bunnix came to chastise me?”

He hummed.

“There was this timeline where we dated, and you became akumatized.”

They separated some inches, he wanted to see her face.

“As Chat Noir,” she pressed on.

“Oh,” he managed.

“Yeah,” she agreed. “Bunnix...” she started.

‘It’s OK,’ he shushed.

“She had to take me there,” she pressed on, “because everything was gone. I wasn’t there anymore. And you were... it was...” 

“It’s OK,” he said, holding her tight again. ”I love you, and no one needs to know that. I’ll protect you. It’s gonna be fine.”

“You’ll jinx it,” she mumbled.

“What?” 

She pushed his shoulders softly and repeated, “Don’t say it’ll be fine. You’ll jinx it.”

She looked around, taking in the skyline of the city under their joint protection. “Look at the moon,” she pointed out.

“She’s very pretty,” he acknowledged.

“I do love you, by the way,” she said. She cupped his face in her hands, “ _if love be blind,_ ” she got closer, “ _it best agrees with the night._ ” 

He chuckled into her mouth, “It’s rubbing on you.”

“Just let’s keep it quiet, OK?” she replied fondly, pressed against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my roundabout way to get to the prompt for this fic (adrienette hot shoot). Weird, right? I really do not do that, but I got obsessed with creating a context that would make sense.  
> This chapter is pure crack? Yeah, I know.  
> Whatever comes next is epilogue. Thanks for reading! I've only recently started sharing my work, and this one got novel-long and garnered much more attention than I had ever hoped for. I cherish every single kind comment and kudos (hey, someone like my story! I tell at the breakfast table)  
> I have a job interview in 8hs so I better hit the pillow.  
> ILY <3


	21. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrien throws a house-warming party.

Could a group of teenagers help a city heal? Well, certainly, they tried. It would be nice to be able to say simply, ‘yes’, but nothing in life is as straightforward as that. As weeks turned to months, the EHA Patreon became a sort of subscription to good causes, as well as an archive of akumatization reference material. There was an undeniable geographical impact. Hawkmoth’s attacks had centered around a very specific area of Paris, and EHA helped fortify the defences of its inhabitants precisely. 

Students at College Francoise Dupont in particular became much more resilient. It’s not as if they wouldn’t feel angry or sad or frustrated at times anymore, but they started sulking less and less, strong emotions usually going down before supernatural neon-purple butterflies managed to reach them. Eventually, the frequency of attacks started to decrease. The VIP meditation course, to which the public figure patrons attended, seemed to have started a trend many citizens followed. Most akuma victims had taken part too, and the re-akumatization rate was dropping alarmingly fast. 

Gabriel Agreste had thought at first it was a good cover, collaborating, subscribing, nodding... but like the drop that fell on the stone, it slowly but surely pierced through his armour. Among other things. Nathalie’s resignation had been a strong blow. She was nowhere to be found, having gone into hiding, fearing retribution. Her threat to expose him had seemed feeble, but her newly-found urge to stand up for herself had not. _I’m not disposable. If you cared the smallest bit about my well-being, you wouldn’t have manipulated me so far into... this_ , she had said.

His usual confidante gone, he found himself talking more and more to Nooroo. As the little being became more of a person and less of a mere tool in his eyes, Gabriel started having a harder time stifling its will. At some point, Gabriel noticed, Nooroo managed to get away with preventing an attack by just flying into a different room when it sensed _a mood_. Battle-worn and weary, juggling too many tasks at once, the circle of allies shrunk... the surge of newfound sympathy for his sworn enemies had him baffled. He started re-organising his company and delegating responsibility, he started cooking up new plans.

Adrien had long given up trying to understand his father’s mood swings and strange behaviour. He took his offer for emancipation graciously and didn’t try to grasp the motives. His sudden announcement of going to a retreat in Tibet for indefinite time made him blink a couple of times, but, all in all, he took it in stride. Adrien didn’t even ask why, if Gabriel was supposed to let go of all material possessions, he was taking huge wooden boxes with him in his private jet. His father insisted on explaining, though, that he was taking equipment with him to donate to the monastery.

And so, that fateful day in the summer before starting licee, the heir to the Agreste and Graham de Vanilly’s fortunes found himself hanging up fairy lights in the yard of his recently purchased apartment. His friends had been enormously helpful in making sure his new dwelling felt like a home, and insisted on organising a house-warming party. He toyed with the silver ring in his left hand as he looked around fondly. Luka, Juleka and Ivan were setting up the instruments on the deck around the grand piano, arranging it all so that the jam would be one to remember. Wayhem and Kim were pouring the contents of a big bag of ice into a barrel, to keep the drinks fresh in the warm July soiree. Rose and Mylene were carefully putting identifying clips on the glasses, so that everyone knew which was whose. Chloe, Kagami and Aurore were folding dumplings, a daunting pile growing taller before them. Alya was helping Nino connect the sound system, softly bantering throughout. Sabrina was checking a list of supplies, and having found they were running low on napkins and crisps, among other essentials, recruited Nath, Marc and Alix to go to the supermarket around the corner. Max had insisted on installing the whole package of intelligent home appliances himself, so he was crawling around, while Marcov fluttered nearby. Marinette was hanging some lanterns, precariously perched on a box, on top of a chair.

“Can I lend you a hand?” Adrien asked, shuffling closer to her.

“I’m fine,” she said reflexively. 

He saw the stack under her feet wobble and insisted, “Won’t you let me help you climb down, for my own piece of mind?”

“OK,” she relented.

“I know you can handle a lot,” he said, grabbing her by the waist, “but you don’t have to do stuff alone.”

Marinette placed her hands on his shoulder and allowed him to put her down.

“Thanks, kitty,” she whispered.

The moment stretched a bit too long, and when she realized that, she coughed and flimsily excused herself away, leaving Adrien scratching his neck with a silly smile splattered across his face.

On the other side of the living-room, Luka did his best to stifle a laugh, his hands busy now with dumplings. Kagami looked at him pointedly.

“It’s not that funny,” she scolded.

“I think it’s cute,” Chloe declared. “Do you think they think we don’t know?”

“I think they know we know,” Luca replied. “But I don’t think they know we know they know.”

“Can’t we put them out of this suffering already?” Kagami pleaded.

“They'll tell us when they are ready,” Luka reminded her. “I’m sure they have good reason for trying to be discreet.”

“Seriously,” Chloe snapped, “do you call that discreet?”

“What could they be scared of?” Aurore asked, not having taken part of that conversation innumerable times, like the other three.

“Adrien’s father is, or was, very controlling,” Kagami told her. “And unpredictable.”

“I’m sure they know about the bet and are trying to help Alya and Nino win,” Chloe complained, pointing an accusatory dumpling at the culprits.

“What bet?” Aurore asked.

“There’s this bet we had throughout 3rd and 4th year about whether and when ladynoir would get together,” Chloe explained.

“And some months ago, we added a bet about whether and when Marinette and Adrien would get together,” Kagami added.

“Are you OK with that?” Aurore whispered nonplussed.

Luka glanced fondly at the other two, “Sure, why wouldn’t we?”

***

In the wee hours of the morning, when their friends had either headed home or succumbed to drowsiness on the couches, Adrien washed the dishes intently, handling them to Marinette for drying. His mind was too full, his heart too heavy. They hadn’t been able to discuss yet the package that had arrived earlier that day, or its implications. There would be plenty of time for that later. For the time being, Adrien took comfort in the repetitive task at hand, in her unwavering companionship, in the soft sound of their friends’ snoring, in the thought that, for the first time in more than 150 years, all kwamis were together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It really took me a lot of time to get my head around how I was to wrap this fic. If you've made it so far, thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I reveled in writing it! Thanks for your support, your kindness, and interest in this pile of crack!  
> ILY  
> PD: I just added a new illustration to this chapter!  
> <3


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